To admit you still love
those porcelain figurines,
koi or otherwise,
I can still hear your laugh.
The first and last time
my eyes were caught staring
there was this side of you
that appreciated my gaze.
Me and my far off look,
I couldn’t help but feel,
when you were near
excited by my first time
there was no way
I’d not take it all in.
How lovely it all seemed.
Twisting a part of your shirt
highlighting the curves
pulling then pushing
attention was spent wisely.
People were quick to compliment
all the things
I first saw in you.
Naked flesh,
there were differences
that playful side
that dropped the world
for both of us.
I would never mind
your last second calls,
as long as you understood
all I’ve ever really wanted
was an authentic
you.
Tag: sex
-
-
This star studded tree
with glorious riches of fruit
ruby red gems
weigh down the branches.
“Just one,” she protests,
we’re all alone
no one will ever see us.
How unfair
to place such a tree here
by nature aren’t we
supposed to explore our surroundings.
Forbidding us from eating
from this one sacred tree
in a gate-less garden.
Still, she could not refuse
how much he wanted a taste
her overly confident hand
couldn’t quite reach the branch.
In that soft demure way
she asked for his help
obviously he obliged.
The bittersweet truth
of them and that tree
the fruit should never
been forbidden in the first place.
There were hundreds
of other beautiful fruit trees
to choose and decide.
Come place your faith
on if they’re going to taste
I’m begging to beg here
tell me how beautiful
this elite garden of Eden looks now.
Placing this un-holy guilt on her
instead of celebrating
the garden’s rich abundance
enough for all humanity.
Instead, we’re to believe
humans are centered on self
focusing on one
where we could potentially start
world wars, suffering and hate.
I’m struggling to understand
how this tree of fruit
started everything
I see on the news. -
The first Raven recalled
the excitement in her question
do you want me?
Here to always call out
the girl needs me available
the pleasure and pain source.
The second Raven from behind
wanting the beat of the music
during this next go around
hips move and sway
she softly sings and bites.
The third Raven is here releasing
suffer handsome words
down on broken knees to palms
she begs to be adored
bring the bird closer please
colorless eyes fill the void.
She turns and asks a question
will you taste the pretty flower.
The fourth Raven draws in super close
too close for a whisper
she’s uses her hands
to guide him to the source
this is their blessed hour
the minutes twist
she can feel his nervousness
turning to adjust the lights
the Raven is startled
and just like that
he’s off on flight.
Eyes are drawn to the dark
her loneliness cries
softly on a forgotten pillow
come back Raven
come back. -
The trouble started up again.
Violet had something
she needed to tell me
and without words of question
I found myself
ready to listen.
Violet came crashing in
like how she always does.
Me and my peaceful day
were asked to brace ourselves.
Violet has some news.
Against a thousand blinks and signs
Violet still looks
so fucking beautiful.
The smell of her
one off perfume
her glowing skin
I am simply drawn to her
and no one else.
She centered us
by taking her proper place,
sitting squarely
in my lap.
Her news was set and ready
and there on the tip of her tongue
she began to whisper
starting with,
“Now poet,
you know you’re the one.”
I was unaware
of her ever loving
any other.
She and her demeanor
inched up super close
all tucked in deliberately
next to my ear,
“I need your every ounce.”
I looked at her
from a mirror
across the room.
All I could see
was her child-like frame
all close and private.
She squirmed and settled in,
and continued with
“I’m sick.”
Just two words,
her decree.
I waited for more,
some kind of explanation
I needed more
of her words.
Violet fell desperately quiet,
her eyes and head
buried on my shoulder.
I held the weight of her
for the first real time
she was scared.
The image in that mirror
instantly looked different,
and I squeezed her.
No access to the words
to her news,
here stuck in my throat.
To be continued… -
Her once dormant and quite mood
had been officially lit with flame
that cute demure thing you do,
has to change, tonight please.
I’ve totally lit the flame
there is a real cause for concern
there is this flash fire
that will be here soon.
I’m here to reinforce the details
get back up on your feet
there’s a situation
just outside your bedroom.
I certainly did not intend
to start an inferno
I had no idea
the amount of baggage
you’d been hoarding.
I can help buy new stuff
if we’re to survive
we’ll need to get moving.
I pause for a second
stare at you there
perhaps this is your wish
to simply lay here
and be consumed in flame.
I’m here to remind you
The Phoenix from flame
by instinct she has no choice,
she must rise!
If we’re to survive this,
we’re going to need
your dark and cunning side
because I’ve blocked all exits
you’ll need to fight to safe us.
Please hurry up,
I’m here begging
there are more words to write,
I’m not quite done
with all my poetry.
Oh let me count the ways,
on this, a chilly February night
the heat is all consuming
I can see the flames dancing
windows are being bombed out.
I need your hand please
to help guide me
through this fucked up world,
just tell me your plan.
I promise to obey
each word in exact detail,
because tonight cannot be
the flash fire
to us ending.
The images of war from the Ukraine are heartbreaking. I hope people are finding safe places tonight. #Thoughts/Prayers -
Me and my second hand
my one-of-kind woman
here drinking on the rooftop.
We’ve got certain things
here in common,
we take turn listing grievances
the one great thing
we both can agree upon,
we’d jump without question.
One last shot
the rooftop is closing.
We walk to the edge
she extends her hand
perfectly manicured nails
I might add.
She says,
“Let’s do this”
we jump. -
Rescue this side of me,
of course I’d never ask
to be taken
stolen from my room.
I honestly wouldn’t mind
if we stopped
using certain words.
In other words
I’ve missed
how we spend
all our awkward time.
We could drive,
I know I wouldn’t mind
if we filled the car
with words from songs.
Only lyrics please,
sing what is you mean
“Baby, Lay your head
on my lap
one more time.
Tell me
you belong to me.”
Like how Fionna Apple did
‘On The Bound’
A favorite song of hers.
Come out
late with me
in the absolute dead of night
I promise
I’ll have a playlist ready.
It’s important to know
you’re willing to save me.
We could stop
and get drinks n stuff
with ears ringing
from our concert hour together.
I can only plead with you
to keep the car running
we have much to sing about.
Even as our late-night hour
devours the best light
your devotion towards me
is mirrored in the rear view
right back at you.
Sure,
eyes could stare into eyes,
but then you’d know
I’d be making funny faces.
Stare straight ahead
eyes on the road please,
just sing for me.
All I really want is
to be in your new car
in that soft and luscious
driving blanket.
You’re being perfect
my addiction spell
all closed in
you and that
fucking perfume.
I feel lucky
to be lost to time,
honestly,
let’s just
drive tonight. -
A thousand other sides
I thought I smelled her perfume
high atop the Sunset Lounge.
I swear inside
she’s my delusion
a quick glance around the room
still no sign of her.
The sun sits threatening
with it’s a breathtaking look
across an uninterrupted horizon
finally set to concede
to the handsome darkness.
Words and my phone
from this side at least
I can tell
the hours are counting
time clearly means
entirety something else.
Sitting here busy mirroring
words of when I think of her
the sun’s light blinds
the room sits flooded
in a warm orange glow.
Her silhouette alight
the color mood has shifted
I hand her
a dry glass of wine.
Delicate, are her tiny sips
the little things
can be easily missed.
Today marks a first
the start of the four seasons
the air has already changed
I’ve begun to memorize her
from an ancient
source code
perhaps. -
My inconvenient journey
it’s time to finally admit
I love her.
By some random chance
or accidental meeting
I did not mean
to trip and stumble
on her lap.
I can finally admit
I am left with
this stolen feeling
like I’m owed her love.
She’s the only one
that would ask for
her very own
strict machine.
I’m in love with
her eye to detail
how tightly wrapped
her special bow sits
when she craves to beg.
Inside her special box
are a list of affections
she insists on
each morning and night.
Time and attention
are expertly spread out
evenly throughout her day.
I’d hate to catch
her not paying attention to
all the pretty things
that brighten and highlight
all the reasons why
I find myself
so
in love with her.
It’s My fault
I see her in one way.
Beautiful you,
the night crawls closer
I cannot wait
until you’re on all fours
begging for
your expensive leather leash.
The feline
lapping up the attention now
chin tipped of course
eyes hidden and very still
in that one position
from palms to wrists
to bare bottom. -
A verbose set of words
thoughtful for sure,
but in other words
who needs all this?
My book of poems
lying open
on the floor.
I never claimed
I was above it all,
after all
you’re the one
that wanted to become
My forever girl.
Maybe I want you
to write something
that makes me feel beautiful.
Tonight,
when I pick you up
walk up to me
in one of your outfits
whisper the forbidden words.
Maybe then
my verbose mood
won’t be too much
I guess I’m stuck here
under this winter sun
I’m begging you
for an hour more
just eyes
up into eyes
this time
I swear.
I’m bursting now
because
I really want to know
just how far
your love
would go?
Come,
say you love me
because
only then
will you ever see
my true reaction.
I understand and know
you’d never think
my language here
is obscure
or verbose
would you? -
Love will destroy
that sense of self
you’re no longer on your own.
Love is selfish
a singular manipulation
making thoughts hard to focus.
Love can be a thief
sneaking in and taking control
making it impossible to breathe.
Love is my dangerous companion
making us do things
we normally wouldn’t.
Love is a dark stranger
slammed and thrown down
against the minutes in hours.
Love and the impossible demands
hijacked and stolen
sick with worry.
Love and it’s sickness
quite honestly
I’d have it no other way. -
The Valentine
all laid out
still recovering from
the arrows
Cupid shot.
This is the hour
that truly counts,
surviving last night.
We are after all
each other’s first
and only thought.
Love sits balanced
on just the tip
as you reach out
I pull in.
Shh, go quietly
forget me not. -
Temperamental touch,
with just eyes this time
if you don’t mind
I’ll stay behind
and write the words
you’ve always wanted.
I know,
more than anyone else
there’s something soft
that goes right through you
to that center spot.
I promise, love,
I won’t ask for much
a season or two
so I can gather and find
the exact proper words
written in my poetry.
I’ve given you much
to think about,
from the very start,
Grace,
you know me well enough
to know I’d never
go and give up.
It’s cold and you’re here
ready to warm me up
under a set of winter blankets
with nothing more than
that wanting smile.
I swear,
my eyes
are defined by yours
and that eager
wanting stare.
I try and imagine
just exactly where
you’d love to go
you promised me the world.
It’s no use really,
there’s no other place
I’ve ever belonged
where I’m all happy.
Oh beautiful you
take your magical charms
spread them
create a safe place
that’ll keep us
uninterrupted from… -
Here from the start,
this might be the fourth day
me trying to convince the girl
to come with a playful kiss.
Perhaps she’s too wise
to fall for my little tricks.
“C’mon poet,
we do our best
when there are no rules
to follow.”
I can understand her point,
she is the one after all,
calling all the big
and heavy shots
for us.
With no rules,
she looks straight up at this
the one in charge
of her words.
I lean in to kiss
to my amazement
the girl is all tight lipped.
Eyes square into eyes,
she smiles,
and says,
“No rules,
you’ve got this.” -
Her sound
is all but muted,
still, she carries around
the weight of yesterday.
My stunning beauty,
I love you,
even in this dark silence.
I can tell you now
I still remember
the ringing perfection
your bell made.
I’m nervous now
the hurt and pain
the loss of a mother,
and other things
have silenced your sound
forever perhaps.
I’m prepared
for a lifetime of convincing
I’ll take the photographs
because in that the way
it may just bring
your “diiinnnnggg”
back to me.
I’m careful now
not to touch or disturb,
it’s the second day now
me trying to convince you
to simply think about
making any sound at all. -
The first of seven nights
it’s been a half hour
since we’ve last kissed
with these new eyes.
Yesterday, when we were blind,
I honestly did not mind
being lost on the inside
void of this vivid light
I was perfectly fine
lying soulful in my bed.
The afternoon sun
sits perfectly balanced
between a quick moving breeze
I was shielded and alone
protected from everyone.
It wasn’t until
your phone call
you asked me to look
square into your eyes.
That’s when everything changed
a small hopeful glimmer,
you wholeheartedly,
just stared at me.
Unruly hands
are now ready to explore
with a boy-like smile,
you ask
wanna play? -
Certain words and other lines
Grace dislikes certain poems.
I’m here now,
on this other side
to explain why
you’re the girl
who needs certain poems.
I’ll take the potion or serum dye
inject you into my arm,
just a few seconds more
so my hulucinatoins can start.
Whatever this is,
or whatever you are
I am transfixed on your form.
Oh let me count the ways,
and tell the world
exactly why I love this girl.
Grace,
you’re an imperfect star
always tripping
across a moonlit sky.
Of course,
it’s hard to imagine
you’d ever fall and complain,
no, you take everything
as if it were intended
simply, things were meant this way.
To my favorite attribute,
unsure exactly,
how this happened
I make mention of your outfits,
that deliberate way
in which you dress,
like some,
theatrical performance
of course I’m envious.
Now, to your beauty wand
that everlasting quality,
your looks I’m afraid,
will never change or fade.
I love that when you enter
the heads of others
just naturally turn.
Grace, my curse and blessing
sure you dislike certain poems,
but I’m here to tell you,
that on this,
crisp and early California morn’
the words,
for whatever form or fashion
are simply yours
because you’re adored. -
According to the hour
today was expected to be
our seventh start.
Of course love’s sickness endured
no matter how lightly we tried
our footprints were imprinted
deep and heavy in the mud.
I suspect, that neither of us
ever wanted to be left alone
so here we are counting.
I pull the flower and stem
and like an expert
I prepare the blossom.
Thank goodness,
this particular flower of mine
has more than a million petals.
I’ll continue
with my counting song,
I pull a petal
“She loves me.”
I pull a petal
“She loves me not.”
I’ll continue on like this
for centuries,
perhaps, this is the flower
we won’t need to
start over again. -
Time and it’s code
an overwhelming pressure
to hurry and finish things.
I only wish to look inside.
She’s everything to me,
it’s an acute ache
same time and place
each and every day.
I wake and immediately
start to miss her.
It’s terrible having hope
feelings can misread the room
her body is a chemical to me
a lock and key thing
we simply fit perfectly.
Time and attention with her
it’s a pretty way for sure
to be inside for a while,
anyway, she’s my better way.
Overwhelmed on the other side
my love sits soaking in her tub
for hours she goes over things.
I can only imagine how
life must weigh
on her soft shoulders.
I hope I’ve made it here
in time to separate
the things we keep
and all that other stuff
we need to throw away. -
The rhythm to first times
it’s always the same
each and every time
a nervous hungry beating
in the back of the throat
you’re almost there
to a one of a kind love.
I honestly don’t mind
teaching you
that being pushed down
so you can crawl
in order to get up
so to speak of course
is a balanced game of trust.
All of us
just want to believe
there’s an automatic drive
buried somewhere inside
that makes us stand.
I’m not the first
to mention this
give and play
to touch.
A lover starts with candles,
some are drawn to the reflection
illuminating a room
everything so innocently planned.
Others prefer the dripping wax,
what a rush,
that brief stinging burn
and for most
that’s where it ends.
Still, tThere are different types
some honestly don’t mind
performing and playing the part
against the candle’s flame.
I’d prefer,
the secretively guarded,
too impossible to believe
they’d ever be tied up
and referred to as a
“Rope Bunny.” -
Alive, but torn apart
this sickness I chase
consumes love’s madness.
I’m drawn to the pretty of course
the beautifully broken ones
like that Girl,
my true one,
where we keep things
equally distanced.
I’m not sure anymore,
if I’ll ever hear the words
from that un-balanced voice
setting under
that sick moon of ours.
I’m torn here because
there are two real answers
I can’t decide which one
will eventually
make me want to run. -
I met a man
who had a broken heart
he can’t quite figure out
how a girl must feel
when she’s let down
over and over again.
This is simple
to understand, really,
if you let her down
she won’t let you
come back in again.
I’m sorry to be the one
to tell you how
a girl just wants to be loved,
constantly without any gaps.
It’s quite simple really,
try and understand
you’ll find the one
who doesn’t require
the time and attention
that this one does.
She’s not a burden,
at least to some of us,
actually, we prefer
her sensitive
and exacting charms.
I swear
I hope you won’t mind
when you find out
I’m dating her.
I met a man
with a broken heart
he couldn’t quite understand
that this one of a kind girl
is a special one. -
What I want
most from somebody
is to simply be loved.
Unconditional on this side
I can’t help you
figure out the puzzle
that seems so elusive.
We could walk for hours
talking about
that nonsense stuff,
just as long you promise,
you won’t push or ghost me.
All I require is
an hour of hand holding
there’s something about
how your cold hand
slowly warms in mine.
It’s our season now
I love how we are
when we connect
always in a hurry
to get things done.
I will always fall for you,
my beloved,
against these late night hours
I honestly don’t mind
tipping your chin up
lifting eyes up into eyes.
I can’t help myself
than be your lover
it’s always been
easy for us
to turn the mood
into one of our sessions.
I’ll say the words
I refuse to use
outside this season of ours,
where we kiss all over.
I know time is limited,
but all I care about,
is that I have every second
of your attention please.
I swear,
I love that I don’t have to ask,
you’re just mine,
doing all those little things
I’ve waited for
in this
our magical season. -
Here with heavy hands.
The girl looks and stares,
this is a first time
seeing her this way
all quietly defeated.
I know she’s begging to ask,
are you going to
jumpstart things?
Unlike, the time last
her fiery eyes
have been
all but extinguished.
Make no mistake,
even in this current condition
the girl commands my attention.
For I know,
unlike no one else
there are forever embers
burning somewhere within her.
It’ll take more than
a string of my fancy words
to pull-start her engine,
this, I’m acutely aware of.
Still, she’s too tired
to look or examine
exactly why her light is out.
Perhaps,
this isn’t her hour
or God forbid, her season.
She asks,
are you going to fix this?
I respond,
just as I’ve always done,
I am in love.
For an instant
she instantly lites up,
for just a flicker,
I swear
and now it’s gone.
I’m sorry
because I’m unsure
what is the exact cause.
Perhaps,
everything is gone.
That fire does not matter,
you’re still the girl
here today,
we both understand
there are no pretty answers
we’ll just take
and accept things,
as they naturally come. -
The girl
with the broken smile,
I must admit
I’ve not seen her
quite like this
all broken inside.
We could start over,
I promise in fact
that today
and each day after this,
if you wish,
we’ll find a piece
and glue it back.
It may take a century
or even longer
to fully restore
that beautiful smile.
I swear I don’t mind
unless you decide
that smile of yours
may be permanently broken.
I guess
I’ll have no other choice,
but to accept that answer
you’ll not hear me complain
about how amazing
that smile is around us.
I may just remind you
that your balance is off,
may I remind you,
love and tides,
the ebb and flow of life
is a constant depth.
There is want and yearning,
selfish I suppose,
hard when nothing much matters
neither high nor low.
She asked if I could help
with her condition
I can’t lie,
change can only come
from the individual person.
I will admit
she’s my one and only
and from the start
I’ve been drawn to her
charmed and haunted spirits.
The girl
my secret garden
full of daylight spells
she’s a perfect mixture
where hands are simply allowed
while the mind explores.
Up and under,
the nighttime sky is alive
it is no wonder
heavy words
have their whispers.
The once flush girl
sits void of any fever,
her hands constantly cold now
numb to the world.
I lay with her,
my drunken moon,
eyes so dark and heavy
her simple wish
has always been
to be simply held.
Me and my Reiki energy
I’ll freely transfer to her
hands ache to warm her
cupped now just above her skin,
I start the energy transfer,
however, the more I give
the more she hurts.
I can feel her slipping,
she’s crying,
while trying to pretend
we’re not up against
a foreboding edge.
I kiss her forehead
center her
maybe, come tomorrow
we can start
all over again. -
The first of the four storms
has come alive because
a single cloud layer,
advances,
taking away any doubt
we’re all about to be flooded.
The prediction of course
has always been,
an absolute downpour
with no relief in sight.
Grace plays her part,
wearing her tiny outfits
forecasting on live tv.
I can’t help but take notice
that this time,
she’s probably right,
we have something to fear.
She’s the girl
so heavily in charge,
she and her sensitive charms
instructing walls be built.
I shout so very loudly
“I’m safely guarded now!”
Grace,
so handsomely beautiful
she’s the only one
I recognize and admire. -
I’ll wait until tomorrow,
to slip in bed,
and begin to dream with you.
Maybe even then
it will be too much
the weight of dreaming
alongside my electrical wire
comes with a price.
It’s dangerous now
getting all caught up
when a spark could lead
to an inferno
we keep hidden away.
I’m not exactly sure
just how much love
I’m willing to spend
especially now
the nights are so cold.
We could simply lay there
in a bed of
cologne and perfume,
quietly listening,
to warm hands
finally getting their feel.
I’ll be under the moon
waiting on you
while you wash your hair.
It’s never too late
to come to bed
with wet hair
I suppose.
There’s always room
for a towel
that keeps your head warm.
Come morning I know,
your hair,
will still be all wet.
I’m jealous because
everything you’ve ever done
keeps me in awe
I’ve been this way
since birth.
I’ll wait until tomorrow
to slip in bed
and begin a dream with you,
maybe then,
the cost will have gone down,
dreaming after all
always comes at a price. -
Those adolescent
boyhood desires
have truly never left
and even after
all these years
it makes things hard
to see certain things.
Teenage boyhood charms
the dark and heavy
illustrations and movies
show us that other side
barely being covered up.
To our twenties,
still unsure how to explore
the strange odd logic
of where we fit in life.
Resigned to starting a family
those thirties were kind
the joy and fun
of raising my two loves.
Finally, the breakthrough,
forty different points of light
on broken knees to palms
so many want to play now
obey the new rules
if you wish to want.
Combine them all into one
adolescent, teenage and adult
all still the same
yearning to get a glimpse
to touch and play together
we can make our own movies.
I honestly don’t mind
if you choose to look. -
Watching the night unfold
there’s never been
heavier words spoken
quite like this before.
Grace turned,
coming back because
she felt safe again.
Life should have never
turned its back
away from her.
That safe place,
sits shattered now
on the floor.
I swear I don’t mind
helping her
sweep the sharp and jagged pieces
so no one else gets hurt.
The tearful art of crying,
helping her
see the brighter side,
from afar.
We both now recognize
how crazy it ever was
to be lost in love.
Standing safe now
on our swept floor
I won’t let her
crawl on broken knees
to palms.
Let Me read to you,
the soft heroic words
written a lifetime ago.
She turns with a smile,
it’s a pretty smile
I’m used to seeing.
Hands touch and trace
a heart-like outline,
“You’re strong Grace”
don’t ever doubt that voice
tucked in and buried close.
She turns and whispers,
three of our forbidden words.
Eyes fall squarely into hers,
weak kneed and other things
I’ve never
truly loved someone,
as much as,
I love her. -
A verse written for
My one and only.
Words express the feel,
mixed in all these feelings
and maybe after all
her kiss after a century of sleep
has awaken every part.
Oh Grace,
who would have ever thought
all the time we’d ever spent
would come down to tonight.
Grace and her epic charms,
there’s an outfit to be warn
I warn the others
who wish to look
you can’t undo the sight.
First times,
like this one tonight
will grasp and take hold
hard against a cold wall
the temperature code ignites.
The music pulses
just inside our throats,
the girl comes alive
her hands twist and tighten
inching closer
my eyes follow hers
she’s in control
touching the surface
there’s no better feeling
palming leather.
The hunger thirsts,
just as the hour turns
she promises
next time,
we’ll finish… -
I love to pretend
no one is around
you’re this stranger
we’re just starting out
with that first glamorous look.
Inching up and next to
the girl everyone wants,
there all alone in a crowd
the music makes it hard
to understand the conversation,
that is until,
we’re secretly tucked
away in the corner.
We quickly establish
all the ground rules,
first times words
are secretly whispered
to the back of the neck.
How I dearly wish
we could bottle time
only to open it up
and taking tiny sips
to celebrate today. -
The start of a justified edge
getting ready to push,
just as eyes are set in eyes.
I’ll ask just one time
trust Me, I’ll not ask again.
Here against
a dark and impending storm
the sky is ready to burst
heavy are the flames.
I love the quietness
just before this change.
Grace and her beautiful charms
out on display,
she’s here to show the world
that on nights like this,
she not afraid,
to show us flame and fury.
The thrill in protecting us
from these sharp and jagged edges
is enough to push her
to make sure
we’re safe from harm.
This strong and handsome woman
I’d gladly lay at her feet
gently kiss her ache away,
because eventually,
all this hurt
will one day
fade away. -
Time and attention
she seeks to read
a lifetime of our favorite books.
The stories she likes
are the rough gentle types
where a strong hand
grabs and takes control,
but only while in bed.
She swears she’s never sworn
never before had she truly felt
until a late night evening storm.
The joy of lust
that wanting need
happiest while in suspense
aching for that cherished hug.
She’s lovely, yet once again
she finds herself
here walking amongst us,
lost without her wings.
So as she searches
and she looks,
I can promise her,
that until she’s satisfied
I’ll forever read for her
all our favorite books. -
The hold I see
all curled up
the nighttime sky is biting
who would have ever guessed
she was fully undressed
underneath a luxurious throw.
A real fur blanket
hands are free to explore
with permission first
strong heavy hands palm
in the most deliberate of ways.
Who would have ever believed
she was fully dressed
using a fur throw
to warm her bones.
She looked up really hard
she and her upturned charms
the contrasting fur
there at her neckline
she mirrors the pulsing need
to be in her.
I crawl to get super close
careful to pay close attention
hands beg to feel
this good again.
Against a coarse whisper,
“Just once again please.”
The girl and her words
lying underneath her blanket
her faux fur throw
is beyond anything
I’ve ever felt before.
It’s come down to this
the want versus the need,
and unless you’ve never felt
the subtle differences between
polished fur and sensitive skin
your eyes may not comprehend
how first times like this
come just once.
Take a minute
appreciate the nighttime sky
the soft glowing candlelight
highlighted by her playlist.
Attention control,
eyes are all locked
on the girl
inside the fur throw. -
If I were the one
to tell only you
I might be going mad,
would you
still be here.
Most times,
I feel like,
a flower growing right there
in the crack of downtown sidewalk.
I’ll sit right down
and wait until,
you’re not so busy and
I’ll keep missing you.
I’m afraid,
I won’t find you,
or my way back.
I could quite possibly,
already be,
lost and in love.
Honestly,
I’m really good at
waiting on this very spot.
I’ll promise
to wait
until you can get back.
I hope you won’t mind
I’ve tripped and fallen
ruining my perfect look.
The whole world is watching
getting a really good laugh.
I can hear them ask,
“Are you a fool
how could a flower
ever expect
to blossom there?”
I ignore them because
I honestly don’t mind
waiting right here
for your hand
to come and take me home
and place me
in that favorite vase.
The vase that now sits empty
next to your naked bed.
I swear I’ll be a compliment
there are a few weeks left
here inside me
and my
handsome blossom. -
All out of focus,
eyes lost all critical detail
having spent hours
memorizing every inch
these are first times
this drugged out addiction
I can feel her
swimming in my veins.
My skin crawls because of her.
The perfect hold over me
it’s hard to look away,
everyone turns,
staring at her skin-deep beauty.
Beautiful you.
The dark and pretty curves,
all hidden away,
learning how to manage all this
this strange and unfamiliar place.
When she stands
here next to me
it’s a feeling for sure.
The girl and her upturned charms,
I swear this time
this interlude of ours
has gone unwritten til now.
Each and every inch
easy to be explored
the dutiful reply
spoken by the Queen
all tight lipped, but otherwise,
completely on board.
This easy love of mine
survives on both sides
I hope you won’t mind,
if I borrow your sight
My eyes aren’t quite right.
Right now,
it’s getting harder
to put this down
touched by a flood of words,
but then again,
I can just as easily stop.
Perhaps this poem
has said enough.
The end.
Goodnight. -
Keeping or being kept
tender are the generous gifts
there are ways to manage all this.
Me and My silver offerings
a damaged way to love
with time comes
giving away more of Myself.
Trust that attention
is alive in both of us,
from that backward glance
eyes were in search of
a different kind of companion.
Here we are,
standing just at the edge
the glorious drug and serum
we’re a little afraid of needles,
but then again,
the rush in pain
I should of known
you’d be My one.
This is here for you
My blog Post 101. -
These are our quiet reminders,
the far away rain,
has finally made it here.
I swear,
there is nothing more coveted
than that sound
the wind throwing the rain
against the windows.
The rhythm march
with each new band,
each new downpour wave.
The ground tries to keep up,
there’s just too much wetness
the puddles are everywhere.
I can’t help but stare
out of an upstairs window
the tree try and hold on
bending by nature’s force
their dark silhouettes
in contrast to the gray sky.
Autumn’s grasp,
throws this storm at all of us
we huddle inside
because it’s supposed to be
safe inside here. -
The sad silhouette
writing in the daytime,
mid afternoon,
this star-struck addiction
still stuck in her head
a closing heavy fist,
twisting hair-handfuls,
drenched in her perfume.
Counting down the time,
the jealous sky
can’t leave soon enough
allowing us
to play in the darkness.
Dress up
in that nighttime exploring
cinched up super close
she begs for more
using the one trigger word.
Up against it now
that quickening rush
to hurry and undress
to her playlist
crawling backwards
on sharp elbows.
Knees open and accept
the hungry whispers,
gently biting
with purpose
her chin tips
slightly to the side,
it’s her favorite place
to have
whispered words. -
Oh the written verse
coming from a man
who wants to keep
to a certain path.
He’s driven by the rush
of newness
what first time things
can do to the mind.
He invites us
to travel along
to keep him company
on his free fall.
He is fragile
adore him
he’s showing us
how to love.
Crawling on the soft moss
his once pristine cloth
now cleansed by the mud.
For the first time
he’s finally invisible
no more prophet or God.
People come and ask
where has he gone?
All the while
he’s right there
in front of them.
His delicate newness
which he has taught us
he’s much safer
buried somewhere
in the forgotten shadows. -
Standing firm
with my big beliefs
that was until
things started
to shift and turn.
And if ever there were
a set of forever terms
I fucking swear,
I’d use them right now.
I swear to God
my righteous one
I’m not crazy
to be in love
with her again.
Love never ends
I can’t believe
I’m explaining this
all over again.
Just look closely
in every mirror
they can attest to
the feelings I refuse
to abandon.
In disbelief
I’m starting to
understand
my dark and
dreary dreams
are always lost
and searching
weren’t meant
for you after all.
I’ve come to find out
she’s been practicing
her secret spell
on me again.
It’s early
the lights out there
are about to go on
revealing my
one true love. -
Here on the edge
against gold eyes,
she brightens the room up,
just this time
unlike all the rest
the woman walks in
fully undressed. -
Unsure you realize
falling from the ledge
isn’t that recoverable.
Time will keep us honest
each of our little moments
something will trigger the ache
and in your mind
you’ll start to over think
second guess if you ever
should have climbed
up on that edge.
Big surprises
with eyes wide open
first touches come flooding back
in that moment
just before accepting
you were jerked forward
falling helplessly
into my chest. -
There are times
when the words
get all stuck and trapped
on the inside
when the throat closes
you can’t get it out.
There are circles
keeping us from going forward
true loving though
keeps us from forgetting.
We can escape on Sunny vacations
where tan-lines went missing
topless in the sunshine
the golden warmth
there on your waist and bottom
reading and filling your mind
you’re my one-of-kind.
These early morning hours
long before the jealous sun
makes it impossible
to lay out naked
without getting burned.
Go ahead and enjoy those drinks
it’s still really early
when the sun is at high noon
we’ll slip on in
behind sheer curtains
you and your tanned
pretty curves
here on vacation. -
The Mother Daughter bond
unlike any other one.
A daughter must go forth
pick and choose more carefully
with that strong intuition
a mother leads by example
generations depend on her.
Gender or otherwise,
if it weren’t for our mothers
we’d have less to celebrate
so when a mother leaves us
the void is immeasurable.
Some of us donate trees and benches
honoring their love
sometimes tough and difficult
however we got here
being single, or on the verge
parenting is our greatest reward.
Keep talking to her
stare at the eyes in the mirror
comfort the others
be a brave sister, mom, or wife.
Today we stand and celebrate
laugh and talk about
the ache.
A friend recently lost her mom. The loss is profound. Keep talking to her. #loveyourmom -
The voice in that hour
it does not matter
first times ebb and flow,
just as the beach dries
it is dust I swear.
The nighttime stands there
of course I’m wide awake
on the edge of quiet dismay
there are certain thoughts,
and it’s then,
the counting starts. -
The trusted source code
running through numbers
the prized girl struts
confidence pours
with each new step.
I’m more impressed
she’s able to walk across
a floor with broken glass.
That soft powerful demeanor
the curves and muscle
match her brilliant mind.
Perhaps she is the girl,
she’s certainly different
against an infectious laugh
I want to inject her serum
deep in the vein
freely running up my arm.
In this nighttime sky
desire is thick
taking on heavier shadows
she does not mind
showing and sharing her body.
Let me tell you,
the hours caught under her
that kissing grasp
her nails lightly scratch
I swear, that alone
it’s far and away enough.
Still, there is this
ancient contract
the forgotten language
spoken just once,
she is curtly coherent
whispering the lonely words
we all love to hear
not by rote memory,
she explores.
Let Me tell you
this cherished season
is drunk with desire
expectation floods the room
down on broken knees
to palms. -
Heavy are the whispers
softly spoken to
that half moon
that swears it wants to
give us more light
so we can focus.
The nighttime air
is too cold
to kiss out here
our lips burn
lipgloss passed from one.
It always feels good
to be outside
seeing who
has the strongest exhale,
all this,
without laughing.
This connection,
when we crossed paths
was a little unexpected
eyes glanced sideways
I wanted to ignore that look
it was no use really
those eyes took hold
I turned
asking
two questions. -
My alternative girl,
a different class of girl
you’re not mine at all
at least not any more.
I know just where to stand.
Loving on the outside
the bottom quickly rises,
there is this other thought
someone who is on my mind.
I can’t quite quiet her voice
she’s too pretty to ignore
something about
the words I write about.
This love language
is a delicious liquid
she can’t quite get enough of
especially since she wants
to be the focus of a poem.
Something that’s all hers
to come and play with,
it’s like, thinking out loud
in some public way.
Go easy to begin with,
just until, she understands
the language I play around with
only then, will I be free
to play as I want.
So here it is,
a first time poem
introducing her to poetry
my favorite kind of thinking
I’ve just barely begun
to understand all my meanings. -
I’ve been dreaming again.
I am lost
and in the make-believe
franticly in search of
the one and only girl
someone I can’t find.
I cannot help myself
to just wake up!
I’m all fucked up,
twisted in the make believe
looking for the one
who stole everything.
She simply got up
and walked away all full.
I can’t quite figure out
why I get this upset
while searching for her
in my sleep-state.
It’s like,
I’m on the verge of tears.
No one in that asleep place
cares to help or find a cure.
When I wake,
I put my mask on
and go on with my day,
because nothing
or no one
ever bothers me.
It’s not like,
I couldn’t just call her
to help settle things
I’d never do that.
Whatever this is
playing with my mind
is there for a reason.
Maybe it’s the holiday
or my mother’s big day.
All I do know,
I’m lost and frantic
looking for the girl
I pretty much adore.
After-all, she’s the one,
my only one,
I’ve ever truly loved.
She and her big heavy eyes
always looking up,
eyes up into eyes
she stares and blinks.
I swear, I love her.
She swears,
she could love Me
unconditionally,
I’m hers.
Tense and unsure
I’ll never understand
that tonight when I dream
I’ll get all frantic and ruined
searching everywhere
for someone
who’s
right next to me -
I am ready
for both answers
to be true.
I’ve long since
applied my
protective layers
guarding me from
the girl who has
no real way of knowing
my stained hands
beg for her.
That touch she brings
in slow-motion detail
how I long for her
everything
that glitters and shines
in my drunken haze.
I can only repeat
she has meant,
the world to me.
I Admire beauty
in things
holding time
carefully for that
one-time chance kiss.
Crawl inside her
admire the pictures
all the beautiful photographs
that highlight
this side of her
that hurts to be away.
I can take a part
from today and show you
how it reminds me of her.
Sitting comfortabley
waiting on her
keeping safe from
the jagged truth
there’s so much time
I want with her.
Truly,
there are words that
faithfully surround
the effort I feel for her.
She’s my one.
My kind.
My Spirit. -
Up against this mood tonight.
I’ve tried a thousand times
to simply get up and forget
I ever fell in love with her.
That’s when
the trouble starts.
I close my eyes to forget
and it starts all over again.
I dream.
I can’t quite,
control that world.
A diluted place
left fearful searching
out of breathe in a panic
looking for her.
And no matter
how hard I try
I can’t quite
ever catch up to her.
I can’t open my eyes
and just stop.
Instead,
I avoid sleeping.
Always lost,
out searching
each and every night.
I ask for one simple wish
whispered secretly
of course.
I’m Centered squarely,
in my perfect praying position,
down on broken knees
to palms.
I ask
bless and find me,
please. -
Let’s be clear here.
There are friends,
and there are other friends.
Some are acquaintances,
some we’d drink coffee with,
still there is one
we couldn’t wait
to be alone with.
The friendship code
a stubborn proposition
sometimes based on
sensitive feelings,
the ones we prefer though
are the ones where
you get what you give.
Nothing less
nothing more. -
Crawling lowly on the ground
making sure not to be seen
the trigger source is hunting.
He’s too young
to be having these thoughts
that are all too consuming
tired of always be hiding.
We’re not supposed to know
he’s in the wrong body
we’re going to be needy today
the trust layers are broken
still, she’s coming out
if we’re ready or not
on all fours
she’ll make you feel
like you’re the critical one.
The drug she injects
is a one-a-kind thing
her platform shows
she’s just divine
today she’s on top.
She’s a strong girl now
after all, she used to be a boy.
Gender girl,
someone who’s finally allowed
to live freely now
prettier in her new skin
she’s always been the same
a person we’ve always loved.
~For my good friend who’s son (13) came out to him. Being a wonderful father showing his son loving support.~ #Inspiration -
Unnoticed,
ignored,
I’d go as far as
neglected.
So this is
the triggered start.
There have been first times,
but none like this.
This time,
unlike all the rest,
the 4AM call
has gone unnoticed.
Picking up
was never a problem
before all this
time and attention change.
There’s limited time,
limited attention
I get all that
that’s not what I’m saying.
There have been
26 years of yesterdays,
filling gaps
of moments and memories.
Forget all that,
let’s just throw yesterday away
down the proverbial virtual drain.
Today the trigger starts
it’s something
I can’t quite fully explain
this fucking corner
where I’ve been placed.
The reason for all this
is terminal perhaps
an unfair
punch to the gut.
Push Us all away
shove if you must
silence
such a wonderful friend
so much better than
the one that I’ve got. -
The eyes,
more importantly
her sensitive charms
she’s important to Me.
I don’t mind
spending time
on my future
timetable.
I can stand closely
on the edge of night
it’s time to hurry
the jealous sky
is threatening to return.
First times,
can only come or happen
just once.
Here we are
My future lover
standing on the platform
people keep asking
if we’re going to jump?
I squeeze her tightly
we close eyes
while falling backwards.
She’s crawls upwards
only to whisper,
“You better know
what you’re doing.”
She and her
threatened look
help settle the world.
A world where
all the jagged edges
are perfect and polished.
We slam hard
there on the ground
no one really notices
our kissing hour started.
Inched up super close,
the words
left guarded in her
slowly fill the room.
This numbness
grabs at her throat,
squeezing,
each syllables awake.
If not for her
I wouldn’t have learned
just how to swear.
I promised her,
for the first time ever
I can finally breathe.
Tonight, she claims
that this
is now her favorite way.
To be torn and taken,
fully awake under the weight
of the star struck sky
it’s something
she’s never really felt.
The heavy bass from music
compliments and matches
the heart beat
beating intensely
in her throat.
She looks up,
eyes all demanding
“Don’t stop,
I want more
of the drug
please,
Sir.” -
With little
to no idea,
it is now up to us
to master the details.
By the wayside
the world was once
reawakened by
a Greek Goddess.
Iris,
a true and glorious
climatic winged beauty.
She began the work herself.
Constantly battling
impossible difficulties,
the doubtful others
questioning her every move.
Why should the skies
ever cause flooding?
Why are other areas
so arid and dry?
Do we really need rainbows?
Their weight,
she so perfectly balanced,
Iris spread her beauty
throughout.
She and her
winged shoulders,
built and balanced the skies.
Iris,
and her thunderous clouds
responsible for rainfall
giving this world our life.
Her colorful forested rainbows,
those early morning dews,
all taken for granted.
Iris,
and her beauty
sits corrupt and polluted
her once pristine colors
now muddied and muted
too dangerous
to swim.
Her life giving water
is simply disappearing,
the most precious sip
now sits too far away.
The simple answer,
channel your inner Iris.
Conserve and admire
let your energy
flow lively again.
Build that
sustainable garden
catch and recycle the rain.
Reuse in creative ways,
make no mistake
these new time trials
have already begun.
It is now up to us
to be our own
winged Goddesses. -
Handsome beauty
has been written across
this feminine sky
that I am drawn towards.
And from the start
I’ve traveled all this way
to simply stare
and look upon
a darkened velvet sky.
Time has this equal value
love cannot count
either forwards or backwards
there are certain songs
buried in erotic photographs.
To have access to her
in the depths of the garden
set exactly at midnight.
There is only one,
I’ve come to pray to
and offer as I might
I’ve yet,
to enter her circle.
There are but minutes left
before the jealous sun
appears again.
Perhaps ‘someone,’
with the keenest of eye
can speak softly
on my behalf.
So in that hour
When I am under
her drunk hypnotic spell
there is nothing to feel
pure nothingness.
It is as if,
I’m flying
weightless above the ground
floating inches
from the edge of
love and darkness. -
I never said I was
Perfect.
Of course I was
different from those others
the way we made love
the rush of wanting
here between us,
I’ve never stopped feeling
even though
I said I was
Perfect.
From my perspective
the others were so blind
not able to see
through you.
From where I stand,
there is no greater silence
even though
I have
the weight of words
with this much sound.
I’ve put a couple of barriers
in your way
I’m curious to see
just how hard you’ll fight
to reach out.
Love is waiting
for the only one
I’ve ever felt
or ever counted on,
so hurry up,
come and find me. -
Time and attention
I swear she swore
she could carry us,
but here we are
I’m asking for help
from strange hands
that aren’t sensitive
at all anymore.
I know it’s hard,
keeping up this fight
alone in the crowd,
you can’t breathe
overwhelmed I suppose,
not sure I’d ever know
exactly how it felt
carrying all that weight
of future time.
I said,
I’m here to help
balance all the weight
here on my broken shoulder.
I honestly don’t mind,
being ignored,
I’ve begged the girl
to simply be a part
Of her fight.
She insists and swears
on doing this alone,
a fight that’s
truly all her own.
I’m afraid now,
she’s going to die
and I’ll read about it
years from now.
My guardian protector
cruel in a way
she’s trying to shield me
from my own
sensitive charms.
It was her own denial
that put us on this road
that turned out to be
my greatest foe.
I never saw today coming.
So I ask you readers
please pray for Jo
these mornings are cold
they keep getting
quieter and quieter.
I haven’t heard from her
in weeks now. -
Brilliant blindness
I can’t help myself
seeing the color code.
Touching someone
there is this full spectrum
red and orange
the full moon colors
a love drawn aching
I’ll wait until
forever fades.
Yellow and green
don’t bring
my envy up.
I’m just jealous
I know
I always have been
I can’t seem
to share is all.
The color wheel
blue and indigo
there’s always hope
I’ll learn to swim
here on my own.
Violet,
and there she is
the favorite girl,
and even if,
she’s just an idea
stuck in my head
there’s no way
she can see
this color wheel.
At least I can admit
I’m blind though
handing over a rainbow
that has no use
take care of it though.
Whatever it is
you’ll need it
to brighten up
your world.
I truly
wish you
the best
love. -
Continuous and or otherwise
the sky floods our eyes,
we stare and still won’t ask
are we truly being our best?
The thrill we take for granted
our heavy clouds flood the earth,
barefoot in the mud,
quiet are the footfalls
reflecting on the neon lights.
Still,
we cannot help
to get all caught up lost
following large crowds
into those bright
colorful lights.
Hand held or otherwise,
we’re much better off
if we go at it alone
time will not require
a dark heavy sky
to pull our eyes
to the brilliant
neon colors.
Love is
neither gained
nor lost.
Love is
in all of us. -
With more time to spend,
time we’ll probably
never get back.
Let’s skip the tent event.
I hate drawing circles
we’re different there
us and our heavy eyes,
I’d prefer,
we treat this night
by doing something else.
All that’s ever mattered
is that
we’re experts together.
Love is more
than going out together
to an uneven gathering
I swear you’re my trigger.
Honestly,
I know you don’t mind
when I hang on your arm,
we can go and explore
the pretty world
in our new clothes.
Say you’ll come with me
for an hour or more,
I swear and promise
I’ll keep you safe and guarded
busy having fun.
No one could ever blame us,
after all,
we don’t know how to pray.
Desperate or otherwise,
I’m afraid,
you won’t read these words
you’ll show up all dressed
ready for the tented party.
I should leave little hints
you want to miss out
on the big tent event
we can still dress up
you and your delicate outfits
I love browsing
you on your phone.
Eyes closed,
on the other hand
I can still see
how you’d want to go
you’re pure beauty
in those photographs.
I’ve changed my mind
let’s go!
The big tent event
I promised last year,
and the year before that
we’d go next year
and so here it is,
Halloween!
Trick or treat,
as long as
I have you
Love,
I’ll go
to the party tent. -
Even if,
we promised each other
we’d let go.
You walk that way
and I’d go up there,
it wouldn’t much matter
we’d eventually
come across a road
where we’d be too stubborn
to just walk on by.
Oh not you,
the one I’d die for
draining ink from my pen
I’m reminded by that phrase
if you truly love someone
you let them go
and if they fly back
there’s your sign.
I’m afraid love,
your love is bottomless,
I know this because
it mirrors my own.
I said goodbye,
but here you are
clearly up on my high road
we know what this means.
We can’t go back
to being strangers,
lost on that other side
where eyes search
for that momentary pause.
I suppose,
we could give it a go
just one more try,
after all,
it wouldn’t much matter
what road we took
because we end up here
eyes staring up into eyes
our favorite season
falling for Fall
I suppose. -
Story telling,
in this,
the month of October.
Change is our hero
under the cold darkness
it’s just easier
thinking it’s safe here
even though we both know
it’s just Halloween dress up.
She puts smiles on faces,
open and giving,
with her ever revealing
set of pretty curves.
It’s just easier
to set eyes alight
letting the others
get away
all safe and sound.
Scary are the heavy cries
coming from underneath
an abandoned church.
Oh bless me Father,
it’s been long enough
since we’ve been here last,
it’s just, it’s Halloween
and she promised
we’d make a sacrifice
placing my forearm
out on the altar
begging her please
“Will you make me bleed?” -
Those close call mornings
the pain of choosing
does she crawl or run
from her warm autumn bed.
The critical temperatures
are soon to be upon us,
perhaps still to come
just one last blossom.
Here we find ourselves
treasuring what’s left
of this summer’s memories
the flowered garden
haven’t quite quit
letting go of us, just yet.
As long as the biting cold
takes feelings from our toes
we should probably hurry,
“you go first,”
she suggests
get the warm water going!
The everlasting downpour
that first warm shower
erases the heavenly barrier
she leans up super close
cupping her breasts,
thank you love.
Taking in a mouthful of water
she holds that pose
pushing all other memories of cold
to the far away corners.
Her tiny bathroom
stuffed and overflowing
pockets of steam cover everything.
Her hands make hungry gestures,
her muted body
behind the sweaty glass
there is nothing so perfect
than these transitions,
she welcomes the change
of the cold Autumn mornings. -
Loving someone,
starts over each day
there’s no need really
to worry about this
ever going away.
That is, of course,
you’re crazy stupid too.
Maybe, just then
these feelings
will take over
and everything will be just
too much to talk about.
Crazy stupid,
darlin I know you want
these damn hands
all up and over
palming a hand-full.
The girl and those curves
this road is dangerous
I understand how you want me
to drive reckless,
but always in control.
There are four covenants,
here between us,
understand that I know
this crazy stupidness
is ours alone.
Turn the playlist up
do your special thing
against the fire
the shadows intertwine
to their own beat.
This crazy stupid love
has always been
a part of us. -
Sweating really hard
moisture trickling
finding it hard to swallow
a pounding pulse
coming up my throat.
I remember when
we had one of our sessions
just like this place
this same kind of feeling
the pretty bodies
working on a purpose.
I kissed you hard
against an immovable object
fighting to keep pace
lips were thirsty
my little one
buried underneath
my six-foot five frame.
I couldn’t stop staring
drool and all
in awe of just how beautiful
it truly was
to be in that gym
alongside the girl. -
Just as the jealous sun
finally quits and gives up,
a dark most handsome girl,
arrives from out of nowhere.
Eyes stare up at her,
she and her crescent curves
it’s truly impossible to know
the affect
she’s going to have on us.
That is until,
we turn and take notice
to a once in a lifetime flood
and here is where it starts.
Hidden somewhere behind
the dark corners of night
she’s truly in our nighttime sky,
filling and flooding our eyes.
I cannot help but notice
a single rose sits
begging for our royal inspection.
Heavy are the words of introspect
become aware of the moment
it’s harder said than done,
because our moments are fleeting
and on a night like this
we should simply
gather and dance. -
Be my golden one
inside a 24-hour span.
I’d let you roll up,
if you let me come inside
we could share stories
those pretty kind
that require
some sort of dress up.
I swear you’re just the one
that when we’re all done
with that matter of fact look
it’s only then
we actually begin
the session of sorts.
Inside the coveted hour
the kissing kind
coming slowly of course
you push me down.
Down on bended knee
it’s a joy to look up
to see the pleasure
there on your face.
From down here though,
I can see the clock
time is chasing us,
my golden one,
we need to hurry up
before that other clock
truly catches up. -
The temple verse
resting on my shoulders
I’ve been right here
all along by your side
someone who very kindly
stood by your breakdown.
If today truly counted
we’d have a different conversation,
yet, here I am
ready to lend a hand
there’s no real need
to look through the want ads.
Despite all the rumors
you must have certainly heard
there’s still some time left
day or night
it makes no difference
because you’re my one
I’m prepped and ready
to do your heavy lifting. -
I knew this day would come
when I’d fight
to ignore the signs.
Clearly,
you’re in my mind,
it’s just,
I’m having trouble now
because I can’t quite remember
how your voice sounds.
I’m worried all over again,
I might wake up,
and you’ll be
completely gone or missing.
Little pieces certainly add up
I can clearly smell your perfume
you and your favorite flaws
will always have that I guess
I won’t forget the laugh
I wish I could
take your beauty for granted
I’m love-sick with worry now
afraid I might forget you.
~
God,
I hope today never comes. -
The surfaces are always softer
whenever you’re in view
I guess it never really mattered
I choose to blind myself
at least that’s how I see it
trapped with a belly hunger
I know I could
feed for hours
still, I choose to go hungry now.
I’m starting to catch on
knowing just how come
time and attention matter
especially when they’re played
up against stolen promises.
The addiction is moving
strung out trying to catch a glimpse
I’m not sure you understand
why I keep this up
perhaps it’s because
we tend to come alive
when we crawl in the dark
flushed out from our corners
I honestly don’t mind
how or why all this started.
You still strike love
my permanent one
my mind is forever stuck
writing poetry at night. -
These are my temperamental moods,
I guess in other words,
I could have pretended
to ask all the right questions
without that tone in my voice.
There was this excited Ms.
who could not have waited
to become my burden,
I guess in other words,
that girl is my one true love
temperamental or otherwise
I honestly don’t mind
wasting time waiting on
my mood to fade. -
The temperature code
when the mood in the room
shifts and changes
letting the cold winds come in
it’s hard to remember why
this year’s beauties
were taken from us.
A negative light
highlight the gems
they’re all fragile now
having been exposed
to an unforgivable source
their once strong stems
have been reduced
to a delicate glance
from here though
their strong ancient contact
is being safely guarded
here in my hands and arms
I’ll take the dried beauties
smother them in love
spread them all delicately
celebrating nature’s bounty. -
Standing
high on the edge
the ground is warm
the sky is quiet
the air is full of charm.
Can I come
stand by you love?
We can watch
the flower’s bloom
their scent
flooding everyone
Love is natural
Love is real
just as long
as I have you. -
The soul is said to be
buried in all of us
hard times or otherwise
we found our way
to touch and feel
in a real contemporary way
mimicking nature
gathering our nectar
collecting little things
building our place
something that’s ours alone
I think it’s time
we started growing old together
it’s the perfect time
c’mon we survived
a world wide pandemic
I know you love me
you know I love you
we could skip a couple steps
moving on to our world
a place where we can be
in a big anxious hurry
always worrying
if we should
share with others. -
What if
your manipulation
is exactly what I want.
It feels so good
always craving you
the smell of perfume
that exact perfume
drives this part in me
to the cupped edge
pulling your thick hair back
exposing that spot
between neck and ear
I could live there
whispering the dark
and scary tales of
Halloween. -
We are exactly the same,
you and Me
fluid in the night
sinking down and in-between.
I can’t say this loud enough
the tortured words of love
simply don’t belong
here between
you and Me.
Our soft spoken denials
shout and proclaim
there is this real attraction
or in other words
there are certain things
that grab and take us.
Some have called you
the prettiest-thing,
the others simply don’t understand
how to use certain words.
In all your beauty
such cupped velvet gems
take time to spread and grow
to be fully appreciated.
How lucky we are
to have each other’s hands
to help balance every move,
just as the moonlight
starts to take hold.
We have sympathy for the werewolf
under the influence
of our drunken moon
the night is full again
there’s no denying
there’s the same driving hunger
in you and Me. -
Her voice starts
just above a whisper
time and attention she swears
and whether we like it or not
her voice starts to grow on us.
Some turn and watch
my eyes have not left
watching the crowd grow and gather
and from all sides
the glances start to swarm
she’s our idol now.
The chemistry and energy
it hurts to be too far away
but just as equally though
it’s even harder to Love her
there are trigger reactions
following her song
we have no real choice
but to dance.
She’s pretty and perfect
in her own fucked up way.
Her voice reaches the top
and from way up there
it’s clear to understand why
I promised a lifetime
I’d keep and memorize
every song of hers. -
The truth has always been
something we’ve kept secret
far from the other’s eyes.
One can only imagine why
we’ve always tried
to get behind the garden gate.
Because back behind there
there’s this new language
with a different set of rules.
Only certain plants can grow
based on a structure guide
there to give a good life.
I’ve always been the One
to help guard the beauties from
the stinging sun and its rays.
Just as equally though,
some velvet gems gems prefer
the crushing heat of the day.
It’s critically important
to know each individual need
in order to be their gardener.
Eventually the others will return
begging to look at the give and take
the flowers are at their best.
The strong and thriving garden
where you can literally see
all the hard work that’s been done.
Some thrive under a heavy hand
while others feel just as good
under a blanket of shade and whispers.
The truth of the garden
comes down to a simple philosophy
you get what you’re willing to put in. -
Just in case you’ve forgotten
there are still
a thousand pretty nights
still ahead of you.
Take a real chance
the little steps
have been laid out
and are waiting for you.
Don’t worry,
about the sideways glances
learn to shift your focus,
eyes are all but gone,
it’ll be too bright
to truly see anyone.
Listen for the quiet footfalls
sneaking up from behind
you’re squared and center
ready to surrender
to whatever drug
that plays inside.
Yesterday is good and gone
no more second guessing,
sure, we can look back
without ever meaning to answer.
This is temptation’s template
undressed in front of everyone.
I can’t help but stare
hands are sinking
fully grabbing hold
of the open sky.
Set on a steady surface now
it’s easy to understand
the effect this change is having
it’s near impossible to move.
Accept time in here
as a blessed gift
simply listen to the words
skipping in the background.
Each tiny whim or desire
has a place all its own.
The garden sits waiting
for the royal inspection
for the moment you kneel
the onlookers gasp in denial,
not understanding this world.
Trust and knowledge,
are the jumping off points
give yourself this chance,
because tomorrow,
The Garden lesson
is coming. -
Come alive on the platform
against the traitorous goodbye.
Finally, there are real secrets
I swear I love you.
This nervous anxiousness,
I fucking swear,
eyes are locked and speaking.
And all it took
a simple,
yet, gentle nod
don’t worry.
I promise. -
My secret life
I hope you don’t mind
while I balance both divides,
the mind and body,
here in equal parts.
I swear my meticulous side
is sure to recognize
the smallest of changes,
and yet, I am as equally blind.
We can both agree,
your photos sway all our emotions
the top layers and backgrounds
simply always agree.
Promise, to keep shooting.
Vermillion, your elegant color
staining your confident kiss
inched up for closer inspection
that moment your lips are imprinted.
My obsession, and your beauty
simply hangs in the balance
I am forever stuck and drawn
to you and your earthly body.
I’ll never look away
having memorized every inch
these words are my paintings
memorialized in every update.
To the tiniest of smells
tucked up and behind your earlobe
the softest of bites
where lines are softly whispered.
The expert curve,
me and my drawn out words
always adding to the whole
go ahead and glimmer with me
against the shadows
I know you won’t mind
me and our secret life. -
There is one thing
sitting in all of us
a wild horse or beast
a velvet flower or dragonfly.
There is this language
certain words we need to speak
to tell the truth or lie to us.
Silence is our second nature,
so sit by the water and contemplate
alone in your quiet mood
there is this solitude in all of us.
You’ve come all this way
barefoot with a cup of coffee
sitting at your favorite table
the morning is still and quiet
the sky so grey and full
this beautiful moment
weighs on all of us. -
Finding the reason
how you just accidentally
fell in my lap
when we both know
there are no true accidents.
Starting from the top,
I honestly don’t mind
time traveling in dreams
when you magically appear
all fresh and new.
It was the World’s Fair
our clothes were so tight and revealing
I could hardly breathe
and then I saw you
the colors were all muted.
The exotics were everywhere
maybe that’s exactly where we belong
against the large dangerous beasts
with very little effort
we walked amongst all the danger.
You turned and extended a hand,
a beautiful gloved hand, I might add
it felt safe being there with you
oh my, the love of my life.
You were leading me to a bridge
I can clearly remember
soft puffs of perfume and cigarettes.
Slow walking closely
you were pointing out the women
showing how each one
had something pretty to offer.
Standing at the middle,
the bridge was weighed down
full of the others,
making room for us,
and just as the sun was to to set
the sky instantly turned golden.
It was there
we finally kissed,
before I woke up.
What a thing
to have you on my mind
this way. -
Time and temperature codes
are set on their collision course.
Tell me exactly,
just how it feels
going through the hours
searching for puzzle clues.
There are some of us
that prefer to fight.
I’m standing here
refusing to move.
The flight in you
was settled on
long before we ever met.
I wonder if,
the dreamer is left,
the one who,
shared her treasured gifts.
The standout girl
the one who couldn’t wait
to get all dressed up
the one who would stand
there at the mirror
checking out her rounded bottom.
The Top is ready
to claim and capture the girl
recreate the kissing hour
to finally awaken her
from the lost poisonous spell.
It’s only when eyes
fall desperately into eyes
that the breath is stolen.
Time and attention
have long since been set
on their collision course
ready to wreak havoc. -
It’s the right time now
grab your jacket
come follow me out the door
there’s something I need to tell you.
Running to catch up
latched safely on my arm
I can feel her excitement tighten
jog-pulling her forward,
we stop at the big opening.
Right there on the forest floor
we remove our shoes
barefoot and out of breath
I make sure she’s ready,
so I drop down on one knee
needing to tell her something.
Her hand was all nervous
there were so many things
I could have asked of her,
she wasn’t exactly sure
why we were here.
I looked up at her,
I’ve always looked up to her.
“I’ve been writing
these poems for years now,
nothing truly ever changes
all the pretty things
I’ve been trying to say
because of you
I’m not sure you’ve noticed.
There’s something I have to tell you
I need to marry you.
Nothing else has ever mattered,
I already know
I’ll never love those others
there’s only you.”
I don’t need your answer
because I’m stuck here
there’s something I have to tell you.
“I need
to marry
you.” -
Hi You,
I’m thinking of you.
I would give anything,
to give everything away.
Those lost and stolen eyes
having the hardest time
to stop and rest.
Stare into mine,
eyes up into eyes
for the first real time
let your color return.
Allow the others
to see that smile of yours,
it’ll remind them
just how beautiful you are.
Look straight ahead
to the horizon’s edge,
because if you must jump
I’d have to hold your hand.
Who knows,
we may never land,
but then again,
we could come crashing down
all twisted and piled up together.
Honestly, I’m thinking of you. -
Holding tightly to the ropes
the girl and her pretty ways
that identical laugh
every time we agree to kiss.
I can’t wait to hold hands
in the center ring
we whisper private things.
She asks in a certain way
I can’t help but agree,
her beauty beats me down
it’s no use, really.
The girl is a prize fighter.
Ten or fifteen rounds
she’s always ready to go
deep in the corners
I can never escape
this thing I have with her.
Finally, the bell sounds
I watch her wash her face
the same repeated habits,
I’m always wide eyed in awe.
Lying exhausted on the canvas
it’s a split decision.
She turns over on elbows
“Are you ready to go again?”
The girl is a prize fighter
she’ll go through me
to get to the belt. -
1.
Inert love language
sits choking
at the back of my throat.
To think, I chose to be here.
I put myself in a place
where it physically hurts
to miss her.
I’ve made common mistakes
that invincible side of me
thinking I could leap
and land without any scratches.
The human condition
needing to belong to others.
It’s crazy to think
the hands of others
touching her.
2.
Out of control,
I can’t get her
out of my mind
it’s no use to try, really
she’s too pretty
of a mistake to erase.
Perhaps, just maybe
I’ll get through to her
and ask if she’ll meet me
on the steps of the garden.
Poetry and submission
words we’ve come to respect
I wonder how many would follow
to kneel at the foot of a flower
gently kiss the velvet gem.
This is the fifth hour,
wait, to calm yourself.
Treasure the quiet solitude,
stare and believe in a place
that only you can create.
Close your eyes,
imagine you’re giving a tour
to your one true love.
Showing the time and attention
it has taken you
to reach this place. -
One last go around,
one last time.
I’m now on the other side
waiting on you to come,
otherwise, why would I be here
waiting on the only one
I’ve ever truly loved.
We always made simple promises
that someday, like this day
we’d find ourselves
on this strange land.
I’ve traveled all this way,
me and my odd dialect
asking for directions
trying to find
the only one
I’ve ever truly loved. -
Sitting on the edge of my bed
I’m immediately woken up
my head is soaked and flooded
with thoughts of you raining down.
I can tell
the sky is already too full
a half an hour of darkness is left,
the jealous sun is threatening
to end our time together
and I can’t help, but write
making room for my sorrow
now that you’re all private.
I can remember a time
when you laid your books out
spilling off your blanket
sun-soaked smiles on the dunes.
You’ve finally found me
out here writing my words,
just as birdsongs are interrupting
this is how tomorrow starts. -
Staring up into eyes,
and for the first real time
I find myself,
in love.
Still, I’ll convince myself
to quickly look away
it’s obviously too late
you’re trapped inside.
My mind stumbles and falls
it’s no use trying
others can’t erase this feeling.
In the flash of a moment
everything got all mixed up
I know I can’t
undo what yesterday meant.
Today, I’m trying to ruin things
knocking down this
tower of feelings within.
I carry the weight of you
balanced on my broken shoulder
glad to give everything away,
if it only meant,
I’d have eyes
locked up into eyes.
There’s no time to waste
to run or slip away
lay with with me
with no regrets.
Here underneath a swollen sky
I need to confess
I’m in love. -
Time and attention is true
love was never the answer
yet, I was tossed by the wayside
dropped on the side of the road.
I am here, stranded,
looking at the vast nothingness
waiting on someone else.
I’ll spend my entire life
looking for the very one
drawing eyes up into to eyes
taking away this nothingness
stripping away my ache.
I want the smell of perfume
to step forward and kiss my lips
I’ll sign whatever contract,
as long as you promise me now
you’ll stay and whisper.
We can find ourselves
locked in that ancient dance
always going back forth
my hand to the small of your back
you leading us forward.
Be the superstar I’ve come to expect
be the one I’ve imagined
I can’t tell you
how many times I’ve looked back
hoping you were in the shadows
looking to sweep me up. -
The lost dawn of the morning
is truly done and gone
the lights are all off and quiet
thank goodness no one can see me
wrecked with little Ms. shy thing
sipping the life back into me.
Even the birdsongs are screaming
from the floor to the ceiling.
What started out as whispering
quickly evolved to a heartbeat
pounding in the throat.
Strangers and their funny hands
unsure where to put them.
I believe in foretelling visions
especially coming from
someone so serious.
The one type that get me
oh my is this a dream?
You must know how to cut hair
how to properly walk in a room
know what it means to have a playlist.
The last dawn is now done and dusted
the jealous sun has ruined everything
it’s time to get up and move on. -
Here at the doorstep
there’s such a lovely voice
calling for me
“Come here.”
Just inside on a table,
two glasses of wine,
it’s a pretty scene
all the windows and doors are open.
I’m invited to join her.
See-through top and curtains,
a gentle breeze
her tan highlighted
by the moonlight.
She stands next to me.
We toast our California summer
this time is unlike anything else,
all warm and expensive
these sunsets cost a lot.
I catch the smell of her hair,
she reaches and kisses my palm,
face to face,
she’s surprised by my height.
Pausing, taking her in
we’re finally here
dancing alone with each other,
the music relaxes the hour,
and from her shoulder
she’s half naked.
Up on tip-toes
she’s looking straight up
the night is full.
Stars are lost to the city lights,
still, we know they’re up there
pushing forward so
eyes are locked into eyes.
Hopeless to this condition
we spend a few songs
hard against the lyrics.
Hand holding by fingertips
I watch her ass move,
towards a decorated room
a thousand twinkling lights.
The heated heavy session
is given it’s own permission.
Fuck, the girl can move.
Eager to watch her
my one pre-condition
she inches up super close
and whispers… -
A classy look for sure,
she knows how to make me turn
accidentally handing over photographs
pulling on every ounce in me,
she loves watching my reaction
when my eyes light up
seeing this true side in her.
This is where all this began
between a soft and hard edge,
standing perfectly still,
counting the minutes in hours
memorizing how it felt
to be held in her arms.
She truly doesn’t mind
if you press hard into her,
just as long as you control
that sensitive side of yours.
I try and avoid the very words
that got me here in the first place
stuck writing for her.
She appreciates the strong oak
centered in the garden
shading the delicate beauties.
Her truths,
always be honest and kind
to your whole-self inside.
Accept and learn
the places where you belong.
The girl and her charms,
occur naturally,
killing and crushing time.
I guess it’s safe
to return to her side.
It’s just, every time
I look in her eyes
I get all caught up
giving my emotion a voice.
If I truly whisper and place
the ancient words
perfectly through her center
my rough chin, her ear
my gripping fists
will trip her.
The walls will crumble away.
She’ll fall face forward,
with that,
weightless floating feeling
she craves so much
long before
she accidentally
handed over
those photographs. -
I guess it never really mattered
the girl and her second name,
which is something,
because it’s all too easy
for her to change everything.
I guess this comes down to
how she prefers to play
with her dress and fashion
always making every day
this new attraction.
There we stood
holding our gaze,
at this, the amazing garden.
Her demands,
quite revealing really,
oh how they caught me off-guard.
There was but one requirement
a strict heavy hand,
the one that nurtured this very garden.
She wants my manicured attention,
and the tortured hours,
I spent building the pond.
With the garden finished,
all she simply wants
are the time and attention,
it took to create all this
to be exclusively hers. -
The garden struggle,
it’s just when you think,
you understand,
we have our differences
something always goes wrong.
Going first means
we’re making all the rules.
I promise to try,
to make you all happy and
even though I never will
I’ll be the first in line
without any a excuses.
This garden of ours,
have flowers that need things.
Sure they’re mostly forgiving
especially when we forget
we made certain promises,
to love unconditionally.
Yesterday and
every day in between
we should make certain promises
to take a few minutes
tend to the weeds.
There’s still enough time left
to admire the beauties,
but all that
starts in us first.Qatari
-
Platform goodbyes
it will be a little while,
not having that laugh around,
not to mention
all the other things.
Remember, it’s me
yesterday when we were pushing
applying sunscreen
on sensitive shoulders.
The day is exactly the same,
this being the first hour
there sits a stupid mug
lipgloss and all
begging me to look inside. -
I’ve got to hurry because
someone has really changed,
I can only ask,
is the plump heavy sky
a place I can still look
to see the pretty clouds.
I can still remember
that temperamental side
where we kissed
the backs of our hands.
I’m just surprised to see,
this big new side
you’re trying to fit into.
I still can’t forget
how the room always lit up
when love walked in the door.
I understand,
the world has changed,
everything is all time sensitive.
I swear I can still remember
that handsome smile of yours,
in the back of your car
with the clothes all piled up
it always felt good
lying on top of that mess.
Today never bothered me before,
but I saw this new you
and it’s hard to believe
it was your idea
to ignore the Garden.
I’d ask if you’d be mine,
just seriously this time,
I wonder if,
we could reverse course
and go some other way
I’d hate for us
to get all caught up
looking back
seeing all the change. -
The girl obsessed,
taking all kinds of photographs
I wonder how and why
there aren’t any fountains?
Those slow trickling shots
where time sits so deliberate,
while everyone else,
gets lost staring
at the pretty drops.
Hopefully today,
the camera lense will turn
focused on the shimmering,
just inside,
the garden gates.
Against large beautiful flowers
this pool of water keeps turning
waiting to be seen.
Adrift and carefree,
the girl and her camera
are finally ready to capture
the very things we see.
So come tomorrow
I hope she comes prepared
to share her photographs
of a fountain,
in this,
the people’s garden. -
The garden is bursting
a magical date stamp
has everything in focus.
The girl turns with her camera
barely fitting all the blossoms
centered and in frame.
Her photographs mark time
tonight I’ve come to learn
to take notice
of the fragrances.
A hungry bee thirsts,
stop the petals
that open up for him.
He’s frantically searching
in and out of each blossom.
Oh how she loves watching his dance,
going from flower top
to top again,
until the golden pollen
covers absolutely
every inch of him.
Love is a dutiful task
I promised I’d write for her
just as long as
the girl snaps and snaps.
Opportunity is alive in this garden,
water is all I ask,
perhaps her favorite fountain
or a reflection of certain images
the girl begs for my eyes
to take notice of the surroundings
beauty is all around her
there is one massive blossom
that is truly showing off again. -
Future Lover and
the comfort control,
love may have all the answers
to the things we must avoid.
Yesterday, when I kissed you,
the first of the chances
you had to tiptoe
in order to reach.
We have this destination
already pre-programmed
we just need to execute.
So today we’re in this garden
pretending not to notice
all the humongous blossoms
surrounding the trespassing visitors.
Tomorrow truly starts something,
while today we learn
exactly how to be.
Future lover,
coming with all the strings,
love is change,
so put away the scissors,
soon we’ll know the language
spoken by the ancients
long before you and me. -
Sun-drenched or otherwise,
it’s all she’s ever known
with her stingy dry eyes
always threatening,
maybe one day,
they’ll let loose with a vengeance.
Heavy hands reach and grab her
getting her out of the way
a flash flood is coming.
In disbelief, she stares,
it’s a forgotten creek bed
overgrown and neglected.
The first drop lands heavily
touching her face
with no warning
a wall of water
is right there on top of her.
That once passive sky
is dark and threatening
her thin summer dress is exposed.
Down on all fours
crawling to move forward.
She turns over and watches
her entire valley flooded.
The drenching downpour
carries all the overgrowth away
standing in the muddied ground
she looses her way.
Her temperamental soul
is wiped free of all memories,
this isn’t the same place anymore.
She lays in the water now.
The rain hasn’t stopped,
tilting her face skyward,
the earth wraps itself
around her drowning frame.
She keeps the silence
a closely guarded secret.
All that the others know
she’s lying in a massive puddle
enjoying the droughts end. -
Getting this far
I’ve long since accepted
letting you inject you
deep in my center vein
letting me feel
all of you.
You have a way
of taking hold of me
honestly, there’s nothing
to be done.
I can only stand and watch,
as the jealous sky pulls at me.
I prefer to be like this,
lying next to you,
the night stuffed full
of twinkling little thoughts
I’d love to stop this
and make love to you,
but I promised,
I’d write words first.
I’m pretending to be asleep
not wanting to wake you up.
I can honestly wait
to see how you look
in your brand new clothes
you have hidden
underneath your bed.
I really can’t complain
about your favorite outfits.
I think I’ve already memorized
every look of yours.
Trust in me,
when I say
I’d rather be running
my fingers instead of my mind
up and down your curves.
It’s impossible really
being this close
ignoring the very thing
that has you,
injected in me.
The Noise Inside Me
Sometimes I see others
they’re all happy and
I’m having trouble again
fighting all the images
beautiful you.
I start to count
thinking of all the ways
you’ve changed
the noise inside me.
I’m still the same
as I’ve always been,
blessed to have you.
I’m here waiting
on the sun
to wake the fuck up,
so I can catch a glance
of my solitary one. -
Up from that desert sky
I swore I saw Violet peeking,
with those blue and golden eyes
I can still hear her laughter.
Oh come back to me love,
there are still a million stars,
and from this night until our last
I have been fighting hard
to keep your perfume
under lock and key
safely guarded.
Doubt the voice within you,
doubt thy triggered words,
ignore those who keep you,
promise you’ll never doubt thy love.
And perhaps our seasons
aren’t perfectly aligned yet,
perhaps the sky must fall.
Still, for whatever reason
I know what I saw.
Violet, you were peeking. -
Tonight will most likely be
the start of the secret garden
they’ll get all dirty
down on knees to palms.
Last years beauties
are filling the beds,
they need removal
it’ll be up to him.
The ground there
is completely sterile
the dry earth is begging
to come lay with him
listen to the stories.
The crisp and heavy conversations
are all inched up and guarded
trust will take a minute.
The dangerous girl is threatening,
because beauty like hers,
is a single lifetime event.
She encircles his body
stretched across his shoulders
the playful feline
interrupts the quiet
crawling slowly of course
she reaches for music.
The room is finally alive.
Lyrics play all hard
oh how the words
drag and pull him along.
She honestly doesn’t mind
his pleasure look
against the candlelight.
Cupped up under fingertip,
touch control,
it’s all he’s ever truly wanted
something to never forget.
The restless ache builds,
she squeezes hard,
still safe in her arms,
he understands,
she’s in charge. -
The secret language
has been spoken once before,
it now appears,
there’s another
who knows this special dialect.
So here’s the payout,
the girl will push love forward
it’s all she’s ever wished for
knowing all the unspoken rules.
Unopened and undone,
this girl is powerful
with strengths and marvels
she’ll never be matched or covered.
This is her year
awestruck and marveled
she has a way back
that’s truly all her own.
In speechless wonder
the lessons unfold,
starting with eyes
noticing tiny details.
This time however,
she’s put under pressure
passing in flying colors
the girl excels.
Second lesson,
she’s the teacher
in glorious detail
outline the compliments
with a calm steady hand
she writes the lectures.
The girl and her
intellectual charms,
it’s easy to see now
why she’s traveled all this way
to grasp the language
an ancient contract
sits in her hands.
She signs and hands it back
for the first time ever
I pray she returns. -
I know I’m supposed to be
asleep at this hour,
I’m up against a nude girl
who’s more than a distraction
her soft curves are at odds,
it’s hard, not to think otherwise.
Any second now
beauty is set to fade
I swear I’ve tried
to fall back asleep.
It’s no use really
trying to dream
in that other world.
I shouldn’t have gone so long,
between posting poems,
there’s too much to say
words get all bundled up.
I’m saying two things at once.
Love is altogether too much,
each time I say to myself
I love that nervous laugh of hers
I repeat words
that make me nervous
because anyplace anywhere
have been our instructions
for far too long.
I’ll scream tonight.
It honestly won’t matter to me
who hears me say the words,
just as long as you’re here
at the edge of our world
ready to jump all in.
I can’t help but
replace the worst in me,
honestly, you have prettier eyes
that see much brighter than mine.
My hot and feverish mood
I caught from you
can get all caught up.
I’m imprisoned with infection
that burns in equal measure
in the both of us now
so I look to you
and ask if you’re sure
anyplace anywhere? -
From the start,
and up until the end
there are other sides
we haven’t quite managed.
There are changes,
a transfer of challenges
we haven’t quite seen just yet,
we’re too busy to notice
just how quiet
life can truly get.
There’s nothing wrong with
starting from the middle,
there’s still so much more
we haven’t quite seen.
She’s centerfold pretty,
love is a compromised promise
let me break this down for you.
Most can’t commit,
I bet I could
love you better
from those over there.
Tonight with all the stars,
that’s what you promised.
I swear you swore,
if I learned to paint
you’d love every image.
It’s strange
here we are,
stuck in two different worlds
with no room to move,
it’s fucked up
thinking of you there.
You and your beautiful pictures,
don’t forget,
I’m the one who taught you
how to properly set the aperture.
I’m the one who held you,
just slightly out of focus
from the start
and up until the end
there are other stories
we haven’t quite said.
I could go on
showing tiny kisses,
the kind,
we haven’t quite perfected
because we’re still pretty flawed.
Divine intervention
I take the lights away,
you stop sharing images.
Time stops and settles
I last an hour
before I blind you
and you send
a shower photograph. -
There are times,
times like these
when I over think things.
Have you ever wondered
all the things
that have drawn you
to the edge of faith.
Maybe we could
walk together
holding hands in public
letting all the others
be the voyeurs for once,
like how we used to
look in their windows.
I haven’t said I love you,
perhaps my familiar voice
is stuck from saying
how much I’d be ruined
if you pulled away.
There are times,
times like these
when I over think things
and in doing so
I get stuck repeating
the very things
I should of said today.
Late last night you texted
you thought of me,
you know,
when you woke to pee.
I wonder if,
you have any idea
how much I love you.
The girl,
that would grab her phone
on the way to the bathroom
letting me know
I’m her first thought,
before nature calls. -
Tonight the sky shattered,
way up overhead,
there sits a million little parts.
It’s hard to imagine
not being with you,
the one I love the most.
Perhaps the sky shattered on purpose
the twinkling little lights
are there to draw us up,
eyes stare up into eyes
it’s hard here without you.
I know I’ve pushed you away
to create more space.
I know I’m careful
especially where I step
I’m sure you understand
the floor has been swept.
In a thousand different ways
I’ve asked if you wouldn’t ask,
and I know it’s selfish,
but I’ve spent my entire life
trying to convince you
I know myself.
You’re pretty,
in so many different ways
I sometimes catch myself
trying to act like you,
it’s impossible really,
because I can’t be you.
I can only love you
it’s enough to know
tonight the sky shattered
sprinkling a million pinpoints,
as my beautiful reminder
to look up
and make that wish again. -
The story begins like this,
on a warm summer’s eve
there was a nervousness
the two lovers kept apart
by the rules of the Kingdom.
Unable to obey anymore
one snuck into the night,
and from the start
the risk of being caught
only added to their excitement.
Oh, but to smell her once again
to hand hold and stare,
standing just under her window
a familiar voice was in the air.
“Is that you my love?”
They froze at their reflections,
thinking, how wonderful this was
to be back in each other’s arms,
the girl on the balcony froze
someone has seen her light.
“Juliette, are you alright?”
She turned and replied,
“I am more than alright!”
She stared down at her stranger
and with the softest of whispers
she instructed her lover
“Hurry and get up here.”
Finally, the two lovers together,
Juliette and Marie. -
On a platform
it’s strange standing here,
elevated above everyone else.
I swear I’m trying
to come up with the words
to help explain exactly how
this stolen feeling
is buried within.
Strangers push on me,
it’s obvious I’m in the way
I’ve been this way
long before now.
I push back,
keeping my ground
I honestly care
what some may think
I’m not moving
until I get this out.
Texting in a sea of strangers
who have no idea
how important this is
to convey love in this way.
It’s fine,
interrupting this busy world
and I smile because
I’ve learned to release,
this, I’ve learned from you.
My one true one
it’s a restless feeling for sure
to hear your voice.
That subtle laugh,
un-interrupting
but still, I stand here
on this platform
waiting on you. -
The start of my first and only
I swear I can stare at her for hours,
but just as equally,
I could turn and walk away.
I’m convinced, she’s my hero,
each and every time
I close my eyes,
it’s impossible
not to search for her.
My hero persists because
she filled this void
left vacant centuries ago.
Sure, she’s horrendously flawed,
it’s worth noting,
she has this soft glowing scent
a memory trigger for sure.
I know when she’s close
or has passed through a room,
that beautiful scent of hers
has always tripped me up.
I can’t quite explain
how all her little triggers
have imprinted on me,
and here I stand
next to my hero
watching her flawed powers
touch and take control. -
Into the gentle night
birdsongs have gone all quiet
their anxiously waiting
to see who will emerge
from that once broken blind.
The girl and her charms,
she has these stories to tell
against a softly broken accent
I love figuring out her words.
What’s even better,
learning that ancient language
hard against the universal truths
certain phrases in ones tongue
have the identical meaning.
So when things,
get all heated and such
across the touching layer
the girl simply reaches out,
so I can take hold,
and enjoy the ride. -
Finally, our summer-time has returned
it’s warm tonight,
you’ve come ready to play
that kind of warmth
where everything sits still
too tired to move anymore.
Nothing wants to be outside
not until things cool a bit.
There on top of the comforter
your room begs to be used again
in the old kind of ways.
Voices and sounds
are alive again.
Up on the saddle,
against the sensitive air
your long hair on shoulders
it feels good to be free again.
That topless stare
I know you love sharing,
eyeing the excitement in me
tonight is so brand new.
I won’t take time for granted
as long as we’re in this room. -
The color code
begging for the hour to hurry
the boy and his dark little soul
want to get up and leave.
I swear lover,
the night still bleeds
I can clearly see that pretty place,
it’s all I’ll ever have
the crimson leaves
placed in colored vases.
Maybe this is our better place
God knows I’ve prayed enough
damn, heavy sipping
the new, surely are different now.
With temptation set to ruin everything
I accept the bet,
heavy mouths and their whispers
sure, I don’t mind to listen.
There against the edge
claws dig in and twist
with full attention now
I have no other choice,
but to listen closely
to the girl who produces
the beautiful photographs.
Red colored vase,
inspiration comes once
love-making in the afternoon
the bright sun outlining
a very thinly laced dress.
The colors in eyes,
it doesn’t really matter now
that I’m all blind.
I’ll use my hands
to get around
I’ll feel the world
on all fours. -
Through the veil of trees
this is our comfort place,
and as strange as it seems
I know I can help you
come run with me.
Through thick and heavy words
want drips from the mouth
buried in those good Ol’ days
when we kissed all freely.
Let words come crashing down
don’t get all caught up
thinking how it’ll work out.
We’re here on the eve,
maybe we’ll emerge
from these trees.
I honestly don’t mind
watching the sun in the morning
the release of that glow
mirroring this feeling
buried in here somewhere.
Time and attention,
I swear it wasn’t that long ago
you swore we’d have a place
built for our heroes. -
Standing on this platform,
I must admit,
I’m impressed by one of you
you’ve read almost every poem.
The hours inside days
I’ve been on your mind
trying to unravel
exactly why all this truly matters.
Just words,
I beg to be different
because I am in love
standing on this platform
looking back at all of you
from all over the world.
The good in all of us,
I appreciate you,
the time and attention
you’ve shown.
I wonder if,
the tables were turned
and I followed every syllable
the dedication you’ve shown
I think I could get lost
in your words too.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I wanted to say thank you for following my poems. I shared with a friend how a number you have read and liked a solid number of poems. It was suggested that I “Pen Pal” anyone that would like to talk. So let’s talk. Thank you for reading the words.
Jeffrey
dragonfly533@icloud.com -
There from the start
she’ll try anything
to find her way in the hive.
By birthright, she’s the one,
a chosen giver,
there to give us life.
She has her protectors
with one solitary thought
guard the Queen Bee.
Her private army
will swarm to protect her
sworn never to leave her side.
Against all good reason,
she longs to perform
her favorite dance.
With a normal life
keeping her crushed and busy,
there’s more to the hive
set in its darker corners.
The Queen craves time
to be alone and free
allowed to explore.
Perhaps, she’ll be the one
to forcefully guard
applying the pressure
and perform for the others.
For a single day,
maybe she could take a break
get away from us,
to enjoy the sweet flowers.
She just might dare
to move an inch forward,
it could trigger chaos
a heavy swarm for sure
I’m sure she’d look pretty.
Seriously though,
who are we kidding?
The Queen was born
to be in charge,
all coveted and protected
sharing her hive’s honey
with the rest of us
in our envious world. -
This is the start,
the spotlight hour,
let the questions be asked.
From the first until the last
let’s let answers
trigger the complicated feelings.
Want versus the need
she is here to dance
to fill our lives.
There is a depth in words
that make perfect sense
only she understands.
There are certain meanings
from underneath this light
the girl has perfect balance.
Tiptoeing or otherwise,
she has near perfect form
it’s hard to turn away from her.
Still, the future is female,
time is running quiet
she’s calm and ready
the crowd grows silent.
From the center outward
the curtains separate
lights outline her figure,
just as the music starts
the ballerina steps forward
to begin her dance. -
Perhaps today was our best moment,
in these sessions of ours,
we move without words.
Unmatched from anything before
I swear, I’ve memorized her tempo
there’s something powerful
coming from deep inside her.
what I love most
her drowning trigger memory.
The world may be changing
some run from their source
thank goodness there are some
who embrace their beauty gene.
Every thought has an outcome,
from the outside
there are sensitive surfaces.
The touch control,
something she’s taught
there’s no need for permission
there are certain places
where a hand is free to grab.
The rush in her feeling,
she begs to move in closer
I promise not to ask,
I’ll grab hold of the moment
inch up super close
whisper her trigger words.
We said we’d wait for night,
it’s no use really,
the girl and her pretty charms
a broken understanding
it’s all too much
this borrowed ache
building between us both. -
A temporary machine-like feeling
pulses throughout the body,
strong and everlasting.
These mechanical positions
void of all imagination
I just want to bend,
to be flexible again,
twisted and or contorted,
by the hands of my lover.
An all too sensitive girl,
afraid I might break
if I were put under
any undo pressure.
We switch positions,
just so I can show her
temperamental control.
Woah, I didn’t expect her
to love the pressure so,
more, squeeze harder, please.
Funny, she’s starting to use
certain trigger words
she must have read
on the back of one of those,
smut magazines.
I can’t believe, what I’m seeing,
the once demure girl,
has to wear, skin tight leather
in order to feel.
It’s a new day,
short bursts of electricity
fill our once dull room.
I seriously cannot wait
to see just how far
the girl will go tonight,
when she’s the one
in total control. -
With a heavy handed voice
coming softly of course,
the girl repeated her command.
I have come all this way
without shoes or protective layer,
who amongst you speaks my language?
With eyes so cleverly disguised
she watched the crowd intently,
to see who would step forward.
From there in the dead center,
she could hear their song,
eyes turned at the intrusion
his words slightly above a whisper.
In that blessed moment
Violet waived the others away,
allowing his voice
to be the only reasonable sound.
Violet stood over her beloved
the poet and his lyrical words
there with his ink-stained fingers
she smiled at the sight of him.
In lock step with each other
Violet simply offered a kiss,
against a thousand blinks and sighs
he bent gently forward
kissing the tip of her nose.
Violet wanted more of him,
oh the hours she’d spent with him
in the dark recesses in her mind.
She looked back at him,
surprised by his playful kiss
and with that little shy grin
she whispered just to him
“Come find me,
when you’re ready to…”
And just like that,
Violet stormed blissfully away
wishing her poet
would come and follow. -
There is good in the morning
we sometimes shout together,
but try as we might
I can’t ignore the betrayal.
To say you’d love
and forever count
was met with denial and doubt.
So here I am left,
the handsome stranger,
every now and again
I get some morbid letter.
Please forgive,
so we can start again.
Well, I’m here to tell you
on the eve of my big event
I can’t see myself
getting over,
the image I hold in my head. -
In kindness,
so balances my love and joy.
These words are my witness
that help convey
the urgency of my love.
In strict adherence
I pay tribute to time,
for as long as I can remember
I’ve held a bow for her.
Alongside birdsong,
there is no more purer quality.
I call you here now
to simply bear witness
to the fire in my soul.
It is only when I am near her
do all things settle and calm.
I have come all this way
to confess a betrayal,
cursed while in a dream state.
I am frantically searching
whenever my eyes close,
oh how I beg for her return. -
My apologies,
I’ve been away
writing this book
I promised myself.
A New Years Resolution
the first draft is done
I’m currently editing
the second time around
was much harder
than I ever imagined.
My 33 chapters
who would have imagined
I’d have 350 pages
one hell of a story
a lifetime of observing.
I hope you’ll promise
to read every word.
Maybe then you’ll understand
why I am this poet.
I’m lucky
to have you
reading my words.
I swear and promise
it’ll go to the editors soon.My apologies
-
Love’s poison bitter pill
I swear I crave the girl
with a temperamental dark side,
so that when we kiss
we’re all dramatic
like this will be our first and last.
Maybe I’ll choose you
to be my tepid lover,
could you handle the command
to softly cut my arm?
Understand, we’ll make love
in strange places,
we’re different, you and I
a one of a kind passion
the builds and then crashes down.
I’m lucky to be lost
loving you. -
I can’t help but care to imagine
just exactly the reasons why
there was this first night.
The sound of a starting gun,
triggered that our race was on,
with a thick and heavy smell
gunpowder our memory scent now.
The feline was born and alive
she sprang forward in the shadows
with her sinking claws
all poised to strike.
I dare not move
she’s too dangerous
in this, the radar hour.
She cuts the distance in half
any movement draws attention
the songbirds have gone all quiet
heavy eyes have found their mark.
In a deafening silence
she cornered and captured her prey
the pulsing jugular vein
there for the taking
she sank the first bite
tasting the quickened pulse
an erotic joy of fire
connected us as one.
The light quickly fading
I lay there helpless
ready to accept my fate,
but then came a stunned reversal
she nursed me back
jerking me from the edge.
Eyes locked up into eyes,
she whispered,
“Until next time
My precious pet.”
And just as quickly
as all this got started
the girl and her infectious scent
simply up and vanished
leaving me here exhausted
with two very tiny
pin pricks. -
Time counts in between
so you shield your eyes
from the sun coming in.
Will you dance with me?
Here on an empty field
we come super close together,
you and your tiny frame
folded neatly in my pocket.
We step as the music starts
you whisper our forbidden secret
using our favored trigger words.
Careful to keep perfect rhythm
the world softly spins,
alone against the tepid sky
you spin from extended arm
soft shoulders flex hard,
we push the want forward
there in each other’s arms
we live an entire life
in one night. -
This is our hour
I find myself awake with you
underneath a million blinks and sighs
for the first real time
you’ve discovered these words.
Maybe this is the language
that speaks to you
in some different way
I’m willing to teach you
I’ve come all this way
to whisper quietly.
Beautiful spring flowers
are waiting to burst
showing their naked blossoms
they honestly don’t mind
if we stare, just as long,
as we give them
something else in return.
This is why perhaps
I find myself
caught up inside you.
I’m willing to give
whatever it takes
to make nature agree
with my plan for us.
We could advance slowly
Me showing you exactly how
to stand stoic at my side
inch up close to me
take hold of my arm.
I promise to listen
to every guarded word of yours,
just as you tug and pull
to slowly uncover
this secret part in me
that covets and memorizes
every part in you.
I’ve already begun
to take notice
of all the attention
you’ve given Me and my words.
Balancing on an edge
this is our morning,
I can’t wait for you
to awaken and read these words
knowing I can’t stop
thinking of you. -
Skin soaked reminiscing
we sit here looking
face to face
and for the first real time
eyes are locked
balancing between
this need of ours.
The pulse quickens
I cannot erase
these feelings
mixed with the warm rays
our treasure source,
you undresses,
curled now in the dunes.
With nothing more
than the jealous orb
you invite me closer
of course I lay
in the arms
of a sun-drenched girl
maybe this is love.
I whisper questions
she likes how it feels
wanting me to continue.
I grab a fistful
we walk through the garden
and for the first real time
she swears. -
Balancing need against want
yesterday when I fell in love
there was this side
where I had no real choice
so I sipped and watched her.
She closed the door
I watched her undress
paying special attention
to the one
who has a million different looks.
She’s pretty at any hour,
and I swear,
I’ll wait a lifetime
as she struggles to sleep.
I’m love-sick after all
here against this hour
the sky is threatening
to reveal the jealous sun.
I honestly don’t mind
if the others know the truth
the girl lives inside me
I can recall her voice
at a moments notice
she and her trigger words
playfully touching,
just as we kiss
against a sticky fence
her long hair
clings to the boards.
I can’t help but love her
mascara running down
ruining the hours
it’s taken her
sitting on the counter
feet in the sink bowl
working in the mirror.
Fast speeds,
she smears her lipstick
kissing me hard
making sure to leave a mark.
It was easy falling for her
me and my sensitive mouth
breathing the same air with her
underneath what’s left of this night
I pull her close in to me
she pushes back into me.
I enter her,
she crawls and hooks that foot
need and want mix
we use the last of the darkness
pressed from behind
a heavy hand steering
the other with a fistful of hair
the minutes dissolve
the sky opens up
birds are joyfully singing
oh this is a morning indeed. -
It’s sometimes too hard
to say exactly where
the girl is coming from
when all I truly know
she sits on the top of my tongue.
Her name is never far
she asked if I’d travel
180 miles south
we’d have one of those nights
the playful kind
that’s no longer allowed
in this day and age.
The kinky side
the girl has this other side
others can’t know about
she and her begging charms
she’s really pretty
down on all fours
wanting pressure
twist the knot
taking air away
she loves the edge.
Limits have been drawn out
in our plug and play
the girl waits
a touch of leather
while the others sleep.
They have no idea
just how naughty
she can truly be
obeying the rules
time and attention
is exclusively hers. -
My favorite drug of choice
the poisonous kiss
coming from the girl
who wishes to do me harm.
Her fire drug
burns feverish
this I already know
I need her love
to extinguish flames
ablaze behind my eyes.
It’s only then
when she whispers certain words
the pulse in my veins
begins to settle and
I feel warm again.
It’s just easier
to float through life
counting down the hours
until that next fix.
It’s only when I
get all strung out
all good reason goes away
I’m at my weakest point
like yesterday
when she called.
I start to fantasize,
just one tiny sip won’t hurt
I could promise and swear
to give up and stay away.
Today she’s in my head
I thought I would forget
the sound of her voice,
I know it’s no use really
thinking I don’t love her.
I can still feel her mouth
close enough to a whisper
that craving ache is in there
in every ounce of my being
she’s the only one
swimming inside me.
I hate myself
I gave up and answered,
letting myself go on like this
standing on the edge
I was warned
her voice could trigger all this
the torturous pain
of needing someone else.
It’s been years
since I’ve been in her embrace
I’d almost convinced myself
I’ve moved on from her grasp
until yesterday,
she gave me another taste.
I could instantly smell perfume
my memory trigger
I fell speechless and quiet
listening to her voice
how I’ve fucking missed her.
Taking in the deepest inhale.
There is no strength in me
to fight off this addiction
even after a thousand yesterdays.
Today I’d gladly give up my wrist
let love crawl right back in
this time I’m afraid
I might just
overdose. -
There’s truth in the attraction
that moment when eyes are seen.
There in a gothic vase
there are a grouping of flowers
tied so tightly in the middle
their stems struggle to drink.
Imagine the strong,
sensitive hands
that had to be careful
not to harm the flowers.
The mind that picked each gem
placing them with caution
sometimes girls prefer
sensitive gentle hands
with an eye on the details.
One cannot know
or decipher the reason why
a feeling grows.
To that voice inside
that’s often replaying
a looping song
it won’t leave the mind.
Constantly going over lyrics
only to imagine them happening
deep in your private thoughts
you hear the trigger words.
A strong single attraction
consuming the whole inside.
This is the attraction
that wasn’t supposed to happen.
Mademoiselle
wearing something different
beauty comes from the inside
a style that takes a lifetime
to achieve and or design.
I am drawn
to her independence,
how she controls the others
speaking her love language
she does not mind
taking on the challenge,
as others depend on her.
She’s a strong powerful force
that demands finite attention
she is the one in a million
I’ve come to cherish
without the use of my words. -
Praying hands
held in their position
on chipped steps
I’ve been taught words
in order to repeat phrases
it is then and only then
such words become sacred.
So that’s where I begin
how my tradition got started
down on bended knee
I confessed and
took the blame
for an accident.
Time and attention I swore
time takes my attention away
I make my list of words
and ask if you’ll memorize with me.
We can scoop and gather
carrying all our shit
to a different gathering.
We’ll sit instead of kneel
in a candle-lit room.
Together, we will discover
what it means to pray.
Let us define and agree
exactly what rules to obey
as long as we keep and promise
everything stays in bounds
open minds get
heavy rewards.
The next time we meet
maybe our praying position
will sound different
the others will accept us
and adopt our trigger words.
Perhaps one day
this sacred language of ours
taken from palms to wrists
will be the language
used in prayers. -
There’s something about
where you stand
against a setting sun
when you watch it set.
These last 15 minutes
are the most important
the colors deepen
crawl across our skin
a professional highlight
applied by the Gods.
Sunset Control.
The sky is on fire
getting all stretched distorted
the clouds bleed
here on the coastal bluff
I guess we’re the lucky ones
always the last to see her
say her dramatic goodbye.
Even on this winter night
her rays try and warm us
everyone stops and gathers
to watch the orb drop.
Only these last few minutes
is it safe to stare
it’s not so dangerous anymore.
We remove our sunglasses
and sink into each other.
Shadows draw on the ground
like long crawling fingers.
I can only imagine
how pretty we must look
from that crisp horizon.
With every ounce in her
the sky reflects one last show,
she fights her surrender
fighting the downward pull.
We’ll wait through the night
come morning
she’ll come storming right back
with the most amazing sunrise.
Beauty squarely rests
on her brilliant shoulders. -
Crawling in next to her
it’s hard to disguise my frame
against her warm back shoulder
careful to keep my cold hands
far from this girl.
The dream girl for sure
she and her secret charms
I’ve not given up on yet.
The world ceases to exist
when she falls asleep first
because in her exclusive world
she has just one chance
of going deeply under.
Slowly her hip shifts
she settles and comes to rest
I place a single cover over her
careful not to touch or disturb.
I’ve been trained well enough
to recognize her sleeping position
this being her one and only chance
she’ll actually ever rest.
I’m careful to pay attention
watching her eyelids flutter
far off and chasing
constantly searching to be loved.
I do all this because
the nights when she cannot rest
she needs a way
to burn her nervous energy.
There on top of a sleepless world
she rides to slay and conquer
getting all saddle sweaty
she rides hard into the night
up until her tiny body
falls forward and collapses.
Mirroring her heavy breathing
she reaches for the iced water
I can hear each individual gulp.
With everything now done and settled
she can finally get her rest
simple names mean more to her
than the stupid pet names
I crave to use with her.
The world has changed
with a quick and easy gesture
I better not wake her. -
Secret January morning
I realized tonight
this might not be our year.
You asked something of me
I had not heard of before
of course I’m here to answer.
Admire the garden with me
pretend you understand my meaning.
Don’t underestimate this chance
I can easily leave things
exactly how we’d left things
long before we met up again tonight
our game board and its pieces
strewn about on an already swept floor.
I’d much rather prefer
being in some dizzying free fall
controlling the vertigo
not on my own anymore.
I can easily use time
filling out pages
in the miles of my diary
that I’ll eventually hand over
for your Royal inspection.
I just hope in the end
you’ll be there hovering
standing at the foot of my bed
telling my boys
stories about their father.
The handsome gentle side
an insecure stranger
not letting many get too close.
Play my favorite song
“How Soon is Now.” by Morrissey.
Watch me from your invisible shell
there’s something pretty about you,
this, I’ve long since accepted
the voyeuristic side.
You’ve always been safe
keeping to the shadows.
Fill your pockets with my poems,
God knows I’ve given you enough
to read for a lifetime or more.
In other words,
you’ll always have something
to fall asleep by
to figure out my meaning
My Gift to You. -
In her glass cabin
she’s way too exposed
always walking around shirtless
in the darkness.
If ever there was
a perfect moment with her
it’s after a couple of drinks
when she starts to laugh
and reveal her truths
that she will most definitely deny.
The girl that sits under stars
preciously guards her feelings.
It’s way easier for sure
to pretend we don’t exist
out-side her glass cabin
where stands on her balcony
throwing the biggest stones ever.
She’s not just lobbing little objects
careful because she has perfect aim
always using a high powered slingshot
where she might just knock you out.
Love cannot escape from her lips
once a year to a single person.
This complicated utopian girl
she’s adopted this certain way
even as her bar is set way overhead
she’s affordable in other ways,
see through in her glass cabin
she’s the only person I know
who has a driving service
taking her from place to place.
It’s not always easy,
she’s not always pretty,
but she is the girl
I choose to love. -
Waiting for that soul
that mirrors my own.
Maybe this constant wanting
is my own vanity.
The pretty and perfect side
never had a real chance.
So inside I reflect
never wavering from that promise
waiting on that soul
that mirrors my own.
This constant looking
has caused me to notice things.
Only a fool would waste a lifetime
on the hopes of a far off chance.
And in there lies the awful beauty
trust in your inner voice.
There are far off worse things
at least this takes very little effort.
Besides, watching the others
they’re mostly void of written words.
They communicate in little bursts
through snapshots they talk.
Perhaps my method is madness
the doubters are wrong.
I truly believe
I’ll awake tomorrow
and that person who mirrors my soul
will ask of me,
what’s taken you so long? -
I’m right over here
you know, the one
with love in his eyes
watching as she’s kissed
and until forever
those were the promised words.
So maybe I’ll forget her
moving up and over
I’m trying to erase her laugh
that stupid dance
I can’t help the photographs
my temperamental snapshots
she’s stuck inside
imperfect, broken and all
still, she’s the one in a million.
I’m standing right here
I’m afraid I won’t move
like I’ll be stuck right here
the place where I asked
for a phone number and a hug. -
The mixing of colors
we love walking barefoot
holding tightly to hands,
even as she leans on me
to steady our path.
Beneath this rich burning hour
naked neon colors glow,
both our bodies look so different
painting tiny pictures on curves.
We dance naked this way,
for a while until,
someone yells to cover ourselves.
We laugh until it hurts
we’re probably in a mood
we cannot get our fill
sipping on the visual cues.
In this way, I am all male
the triggers are visual
I can watch her for hours
stumble in her unsure way
only to find her footing
back to me.
I’d be the first to say
let the colors bleed
wherever they appear.
The city lights are blurred
slanted rain on our windshield
reflecting her pretty smile.
We drive going nowhere because
we love the sound
the rain makes. -
I’m lost inside
maybe because of you.
I don’t understand how
everyone else has found a reason
to find themselves
a way to get out.
I’m here to proclaim
I’m lost worse now,
than I’ve ever been before
I laid eyes on yours.
Even when I heard your name
I simply turned to watch
to see how you’d answer
you noticed me staring
and it was over.
Maybe that’s why
I decided to sign the deal
fall apart inside myself
to deny the others their chance.
It really doesn’t matter
I understand my free trial
will last a lifetime now.
I want time
to be exclusively yours,
we can spend the extra hours
letting time pass us by.
You’re the real reason
I ever fell in love
the color of your laugh
the attention was blinding
every thought consumed.
I can’t seem to cancel
this contract of yours
the one where you promised
this limited deal
would never expire.
Will you come save me
take away all denial
I promise to pay your price,
as long as you’re loyal,
promise never to break down.
I’ll even get the extra warranty
as long as you swear and promise
you’ll simply love me,
for being me
and taking a chance
on your free trial. -
She asks to kiss her please,
of course I oblige
because I adore my place
there on top of the world
where I can pick her up.
She’s always so surprised
I’m that much taller
her feet are up and lifted.
There’s something pretty
about being above everyone else,
it must mean, she loves.
I can see she’s upset today
tired of trying to tie the ends
making ends meet.
In other words,
life is just simpler
when she asks to be kissed
and of course I oblige.
She just wants it to be safe
to sink in my arms
told things will be ok.
It’s more than all that, really,
because not just anyone
would ever be allowed
to kiss her this way.
She’s deadly private
superstitious in a way
I think she’s carved my name
in that old oak tree
buried deep inside her.
I honestly don’t mind
picking her up
I understand her thinking
where lips barely touch.
She just likes knowing
someone will come running
when she asks
do you
want to kiss? -
Is it so strange
to be in love
with an idea of a person.
It’s a stunning high, really,
because when that one
trips clumsily,
it’s easy to reach
and help them.
The service award
wanting the pleasure of others
I could go a lifetime
passing up the high
of knowing something different.
Bless the first times
meeting the one
who causes this drowning.
There are innocent accidents
so many new things to try
down and underneath
we know this is working
when we start to speak
this silly language.
There are a handful here
that understand every word
I wish to have your audience
we could share and take turns
reciting the words in titles.
The morning is our dark friend
some try an avoid her
staying up all night
reversing the sleep cycle.
Everyone changes,
still, there are the devoted few
that demand a poem
to keep their minds distracted,
keeping just busy enough,
in order to delay
the start of another
real day. -
These are new coverings
with open hands to palms
I invite one closer.
Step to the locked
foreboding gate.
Grace,
the beauty anchor,
begs to be taught
the rules of this garden.
With stained-glass darkness
the brilliant sun illuminates
her shimmering eyes
for the first real time.
She asks for more words
explaining this place,
its well worn paths
that lead to favorite flowers.
She has simple wishes,
to be admired,
like the scent-less blossom
sprayed with Kai perfume.
Scent, her first lesson
our trigger source
she’s handed her very own bottle
of the cherished aroma.
We step to the next display
a sunlight-craving climber,
the wisteria vine
that begs to be noticed.
Grace is handed
a see-through blouse,
just as coastal winds
make the ideal photograph.
Standing against the railing,
Grace steadies her balance
she can’t help but stare
the bees and their feeding,
by instincts alone.
They search feverishly
coating their tiny bodies
in nature’s golden pollen.
Grace offers her demure wrist
a most delicate of bracelets
magically ties her
to this magical garden.
You can see true happiness
all lined up in her eyes.
Grace cherishes the offerings
looking over shoulder
she privately whispers,
“Blessed are these remedies
I promise to protect
my time here
in the garden.”
There as the sun settles
Grace steps forward
slowly accepting
the moonlit sky.
www.kaifragrance.com -
Time and attention,
two very sensitive conditions
shine when you’re at your best.
I swear and promise
we will share and balance
the start of all this.
I’ve been meaning to write
about a pristine garden
where we plant and make rows.
Spend the hours with me
learning how to properly tend
all the lovely gems.
There are tiny details
I hope you see
the larger story now.
Come lay with me
smell the different flowers
recognize how to prune.
There are certain hours
we’ll walk barefoot
under the neon glow.
Avoid love
hold hands tightly
jump over pitfalls.
We’ll soon start to learn
our own unique language
spoken by the ancients.
Let me teach you
how to safely clear overgrowth
an empty pallet awaits.
I can’t wait to discover
the hidden thorn
held tightly behind the back.
Here we stand
against our cancel culture
will you jump? -
Maybe I did
place you
way up there
when I put your head
up in the clouds.
I get it
it’s hard
to breathe up there.
Not to mention
trying to be all
perfect
most all of the time.
So You fell yesterday,
I’m here aren’t I?
Trying to pick you up
and place you
right back
up there.
Why can’t you
understand
you belong there
up in the clouds
where you are
all loved on.
It’s a bright stage
so what?
You can handle this
I’ll find someone
to dress you
apply the makeup
whatever you want.
I’m not the only one
trying to lift you
to that place
where you’ve never been
this popular.
Why can’t you get
we need you
back on that stage
to perform?
We’ll pay
any price.
Ignore the rest
they’re just jealous
you know you’re prettier
have a bigger chest.
You love it
when they turn
and look up
in your direction.
It’s hard to see
that glowing charm
when you’re down here
intermixed and mingling
with the rest of us.
I promise
if you go back
take your proper place
we’ll cherish you
your popularity
is sure to explode.
Just imagine
the millions
of followers
that will flood and
be at the foot
of your stage alone.
Just sit there
do your act
give them
what it is they want
you made this promise
when you decided
to sell yourself.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ -
Money and music
heavy are the sounds
coming from that thumping bass
coming from our throats.
Could it possibly be
the reason why
we’re dancing now
in our certain way
where bodies just lay
heavily on each other.
Today,
the day is lazy
we are strewn
all over the place
spending hours
spending a fortune
on handsome things
that are sure
to make us pretty again.
I was put here
to pull you from
the depths of doubt.
Don’t question why
we’re here now.
Let’s focus on
that figure of yours
curves and all, but still
you complain
crazy still
you can’t see yourself
anything other than
beautiful.
Let me write a poem
to show the world
how absurd
it is to feel
anything but
my cherished
one. -
Starting
every verse
in identical fashion
breaking up
the thoughts
we share
in our sentences.
I can only wish
to be loved
by the one
true one
who loves the most.
It can happen
at any time really
it’s a wish
that’s been wished
a thousand times before
the title was ever lost.
I’ve seen words
whispered
to backs of hands.
I swear
nothing’s more
beautiful than
You
in your
praying position.
Always down
on broken knees
to palms
hands are folded
properly
of course.
Use your mouth
to chant the whispers
you want to have happen.
Call and summon the one
you need in front of you
to satisfy the ache
building slowly
up underneath. -
Today it rained
for the first true time
in more than a century.
Oh how I’ve counted so,
as I pull and pluck each petal.
It’s been longer still,
since I’ve seen that smile.
That beauty shot
that comes so naturally.
Perhaps she loves me, still.
Against all other chances
say what it is you feel,
what you truly want to remember.
Use your stylized words
Oh dear, she loves me not.
In her best
fake and distant accent
I just want to hear her
repeat every word.
Of course you’re loved.
My memorized prayer
where I’ve substituted your name
and these are the places
that trigger devotion.
I know you cannot love this way.
So I’ll chant
and or otherwise sing
to mark the next tomorrow,
excuse my celebration
let love rule this hour!
I rejoice at this new chance,
yesterday my lonesome stranger
Time and its addiction pass,
just she steps forward
with flower in hand.
So poet,
you want my answer?
Against love
and this ridiculous flower.
Keep in mind,
my decision is final.
And with that
she whispers her words -
From the start
my star-struck lover
had her eyes stuck in mine,
never changing her gaze
doubled over love-sick
never complaining
how much it hurt
the ache from being apart.
It wasn’t until we agreed
to meet up in a mud filled room
our once clean and pristine clothes
finally laid ruin.
Each night since
we get even filthier
understanding this sickness
truly can’t be helped.
Until she made us bathe
I promised I’d help clean
each and every inch
with her homemade bar of soap.
The rich and illustrious feel,
privilege or otherwise,
I should keep it down
my impossible stare
entwined with hers
until we were both staring
at a steamed up mirror.
How pretty was her form
she saw herself
for the first real time
this was her miracle.
Admiring herself
naturally strong features
hands touch inside.
Eyes follow curved lines
heavily soaped parts
feel the textures
suds start above shoulders
rolling down her spine,
just above hips
my favorite part
the choice of words she uses.
I drown in her thoughts
and whether I like it or not
I’ll listen to every word
until we’re toweled off.
She pushes me back
hard with both palms
with that look of hers
she’s my trigger guide,
just as we start all over
getting filthy again
in her room. -
Big dreams,
they’re just around the corner
this feeling
when I’m all high
heavy in my thinking.
I’m in love with a monster.
What’s the difference?
Today could always be
so much worse.
I could write something
all pretty and forgettable,
but why pretend
time is so different
especially when my mood
is all dark and brooding.
I’m in my early morning ritual
uncomfortable in my own skin
writing about feelings
I know you crave just as much.
I itch to be loved
maybe some other time
I’ll let you
use those fake nails of yours
run them up and down my spine.
I can’t help myself
when I’m this stuck on you
even I know it’s stupid
most all the time
I try to take care of myself
it would be all too tragic
to actually bother you.
Busy in your other life,
I understand,
where I need to go
it’s so hot there though.
I’ll keep my mood out the way
waiting for the sun to come up
warm me and erase this mood.
I can’t promise
I’ll be all quiet
until then. -
I keep adding on
the words go against the hours
they compete with each other.
Time and attention
something we’ve always sworn
we’d give one another
focus that stare for me
promise you’ll use the words
that trigger the things
that draw us close together.
Lay the perfume on thick
even if that’s the only thing
you wear from now on
that scent of yours
my memory guide.
Hands can’t ignore the pathway
full of carrying
priorities favorite things
they hold onto everything.
Yesterday you wore
that combination
I noticed the time it took
how much you care and love.
There is enough for everyone,
still, you chose just one.
May I suggest,
you take a second
indulge the sense of self
give yourself a good talking to
convince yourself
you deserve to be loved.
I could write a thousand poems
and still, some words are missing.
Attention is a strength of yours
I’m learning to be less selfish
it’s hard to do and
I can see you smiling
reading this admission of mine
that I’m sure I’ll take down.
Today I promise,
to do something
exclusively for you.
The hour is still early
so when you wake
and find these words
scrawled on a public wall
know that
I love you. -
Oh how I think I know
I’d never betray the night
innocent mistakes I’m sure.
It’s true you know
there are seven sins
deadly or otherwise,
we could hide under mask
pretend we’re all protected
play it safe and
ignore all the warning signs.
Do you want to gamble?
We can agree on an amount
pay that price tomorrow
let’s assume for today
we’re free to indulge
everything else
being the same and equal.
We could very easily
be each other’s naked fool.
Why not pretend
we think we know it all
with our tone bodies
some say after all
they are our temples
the ultimate equalizer.
Let’s make a day-promise
we’ll forgive and erase
covering our mistakes up.
She goes first
squaring herself,
hands centered on hips
she motions me to join her
I’m centered exactly like her
she instructs,
“It’s critical
we jump straight forward.”
With hands in their
praying position
I’m in an empty room
asleep and dreaming
when I hear her voice
trying to wake me
I’m here to swear
she whispered my name.
I heard her say,
“Jeffrey.”
I leapt up and answered,
“I’m here.”
Repeated it twice,
“I’m here.”
No one answered back
I’ve been thinking of that voice
why did she wake me?
A sign perhaps?
Almost all day
nothing feels comfortable
I swear
I heard her voice. -
With fun and satisfaction
she ordered a special surprise
a glistening beaded burlesque top.
I must say
the second she turned around
her hips and middle
immediately looked different.
Gentle were her moves,
slowly at first,
she’d been practicing a while
for this moment to occur
and here we were
a girl and her burlesque top
all pretty and beautiful.
She’s the only one
I’ve ever seen pull this off,
but it wasn’t until
she put her favorite play list on
was she truly transformed.
She danced closer
placing me on the edge of the bed,
so fucking beautiful,
unclipping her hair
flowing over shoulders
she dimmed and changed lights
the colorful beads
sparkled from candle light.
Hypnotic hip movements
how did she learn all this?
Roxy and her little top
did all this
with big eyes and smiles
she’s easy to love
my wonderful electric machine. -
My broken shoulder
maybe it’s hard enough
holding onto the weight
of ever having loved you.
Did you ever think
it was ever possible
I’d trip,
coming up with all this?
The things we say in poems
are so easy to dismiss.
There are pretty answers
I can’t always predict
handsome things come from you, always,
especially when
you’re hidden behind a wall.
I dare not push
for answers I don’t want feel
so I wait
for the look
on your face
to turn a different shade.
I love you when
you’re asking for a hand in yours.
The perpetual distressed damsel
not wanting to be counted out.
I swear you swore back then,
promising if I held tight to your hand,
you’d be forever be mine
I’m pretty sure you assured me then
you’d never let go
as you’ve clearly done. -
The start of the hour
nervous digging startles us
we turn knowing we’re not alone.
This is the midnight hour,
the girl turns and smiles,
welcoming the others to their places.
We’ve come here to play
she undresses the silence
eyes stare straight ahead
they open the candy wrappers
sip and taste the romance.
Hands reach and feel
the sensation is unreal
finally, there’s someone who knows
just how it feels to be felt.
With even more buttons to push,
she leans backwards
presses downwards and laughs.
The curtains drop and close
in complete darkness
the girl recites her favorite verse
“Doubt thou the stars are fire;
Doubt thou the sun doth move;
Doubt truth to be a liar;
But never doubt I love.”
She lights the one and only candle
shadows dance in the allegory
the cave has just one story.
Against the rough and uneven walls
she pulls even harder
inch up and whisper the words
to her favorite
little triggered verse.
She’s begged upon years for you
please stay and listen.
In disbelief, she transforms herself
into the goddess.
Hair and nails are imperfect
her voice is the ultimate drug,
she injects up in us
our veined arms are hers.
We slip into this state
everything calms and settles
it’s warm to be here like this
listening to the girl
who has so many smart things to say. -
The high road,
leaving everything standing
walk away touching nothing
a ghost in the shadows
leaving untouched love
to simply fade away.
The low road,
complete destruction
nothing left standing
the sins left bleeding
every door slammed
the earth void of all existence.
Choose one of two paths
maybe a mixture of both
pick one good feeling
and it’s equal evil twin
meet somewhere in the middle.
Make living about today
be the best you know
and that might mean
you’ll have to bite that tongue.
Ignore the little things.
Trust that voice will return.
Walk slowly at first,
eventually you’ll pick up and run
freely spending the nights
in that belly laughter
you’ll figure life out.
These are your big moments
you’ll show us your strength
the reason why
we looked in the first place.
Today might seem all burned,
tomorrow newness returns
it’s right over there
waiting to be discovered. -
Free verse words
this particular girl prefers
the words to be all about her.
Exclusively hers,
I’ve promised to push others away
I’m sure they’ll understand
Grace and her sensitive charms,
she begs and then jumps
and in that instant
the girl of my dreams fades.
I call for her
to come back and finish,
just echoes I fear.
Standing there on the edge
there’s one thing left to do
she expects me to follow
do I really have a choice?
If I truly love her
I’d lean forward.
For God’s sakes Grace
this better work.
I hope this plan of hers
actually has a part
for both of us.
There’s probably nothing
I wouldn’t do for her
after all, I’m free falling
chasing her temptations
she’s beautiful and
ugly in the same voice.
I think I see her
body twisted and frozen
it’s not too late
to wake up and stop all this,
I keep my focus still
and aim for her body.
A hard landing
Grace lets out a laugh,
“You actually jumped!”
Not that I had any other real choice,
still, she didn’t see me jumping?
I have something to confess,
Grace of mine,
I’m drawn and addicted
to the red hot blooded side.
I’m drawn to time and shadows
all faithful good reason
I’m here on top of you because
you make me feel loved
in some twisted funny way.
You push me Grace,
just to see me fall down,
it’s funny to see you laughing
that embarrassing snort laugh
Grace, you’re so unbecoming,
but you’re all I’ve got
flaws and all.
I apologize for my landing,
she prefers to be on top
ruined dress and all,
she whispers,
“You’re taking me shopping
later on today.”
The girl and all her good reasons,
she jumped just because
she wanted to see
exactly where I wanted to land.
She’s happiest when
I’m right by her side
holding hands
broken wrists and all.
This girl of mine
promises she’ll love me
exclusively until the end,
just as long as I promise
I’ll keep jumping
landing squarely on her. -
Every opinion
every lyrical poem
the words are the same
about this girl
I’m all hung up on.
Holding hands
I’ve gotten used to
how it feels
or how it felt
when we’d spend all day
cupped and lying on top of
love in and of itself
has to be enough.
We can easily spend hours
keeping to ourselves
never missing out
on the wanting.
Maybe today might be
on of those days
where we miss out on nothing.
It’s serious
this love of ours
we keep hidden away,
just this morning
she crept up close
whispering trigger words.
Her silhouette moving
in the mirror in a way,
hips sway,
to the round hoop on hips.
Eyes fall and catch up
it’s easy to watch the girl
right now against
a new year
where we’re forced
to stay inside.
She and I
the key and ignition.
My face lights up,
she plays with my skin
softly on fingertips,
sure, I want to do it
exclusively with her.
A thousand different ways,
just this girl
and her secret recipes
impossible now to duplicate
I can’t remember
to make mind my up.
Focusing on her side hip
she hooks with her leg
all the edges are
smoothing out.
It feels good
doing it with this girl
steady keeping pace
the girl stumbles forward
on knees and palms
and then she looks
there in front of her
the morning takes all day
to finish up.
Love in and of itself
is worth giving
especially when
you find the one
that’ll just show up
and ask to be kissed
behind locked doors
she’s free
to give herself
to her one
she looks up to the most. -
I’m tempting you
to sugar coat the love
hidden inside
that dark side
we all know
is a big part.
The girl and her charms
all stubborn because
she’s not liking
her attitude
being all called out.
Ignored,
shunned,
neglected
all this because
her temper code
was plugged in and charged
almost neglected
in her eyes.
She’s all wound up
in this
the first day
of a new year.
2021
what’s it going to take
to get you
to undress that stubbornness
you so desperately cling to
when we all know
you’re much prettier
when you’re being ugly.
Still the most handsome
you’re the one
everyone wants
to love
and hang onto. -
I don’t want her
to ever stop reading
these love-sick words
exclusively for her.
She undresses
with each new thought
dancing bare top and panties.
Thinking,
how in the fuck
did yesterday
turn into today.
Face it,
you’re the girl
with the magical charms
that keeps spinning this web.
Oh, how she’s forgotten
the power she yields,
she hasn’t felt
for years now.
Perhaps this is why
I keep a journal
to keep her memory going
so she won’t forget
how it feels
to be someone else’s idol.
Teetering on lonely
I pull her back
then push her forward
daring her to jump.
She glances upward,
so eyes are locked into eyes
there’s nowhere
for her to turn
she has to answer why
love ever mattered to her.
What difference would it of made
if she never touched
the untouched source?
She wouldn’t care to remember
how love-sick feels,
all doubled over
hiding her favorite words,
as if, I’m a stranger.
Yet, she comes here
to secretly snort
every poem I’ve ever written.
She needs me
to get her daily fix
of a string of thoughts.
She promises herself
this will be the last poem,
until she gets the notice
I’ve published again.
I really then
get stuck in her head
until she’s all strung out
on her bright screen
reflecting how it feels,
knowing,
I’m the one
in love
with her. -
The start of a transition
we only wish
to peel away layers
revealing the beauty
made of nakedness.
Beauty that’s been
locked up for years
is finally free.
To roam as she wants
all cupped and warm
with an upturned glance
casually falling over
her bare shoulders.
Written there, on her side
are the pretty words.
She honestly doesn’t mind,
as long as we look
keeping eyes
away from hers.
This promise
to always be the one
comes at a heavy price,
most wouldn’t want to swear
to be her one true love
against the hours now
I’m hurrying to write
to get it all down.
So that long before
she ever wakes up
and asks from exactly where
all this is coming from?
I can deny
I stayed awake
making sure
she had her fill
of poetic words.
Love stumbles and falls
all laid out
are erotic wants and needs
that bleed and sour together.
Even still,
she’s prettier than
most others
and all this
is long before
she ever
grows her wings. -
These are the hours
where beauty reigns.
Treasured bodies
carried out in a way
where passing glances
compliment her look.
She’s the girl,
who seemingly has it all,
and yet, she’s fatally flawed.
She passes each and every day
with the same attention
and attraction to detail.
Try and count
the familiar faces.
Beautiful Grace
is Beauty’s Burden
she swears she has no idea
what it means
to press her luck.
Going even further than that,
Grace can’t forget a face
or the words in a conversation.
She’s just in time
to identify the man
being held against his will.
She’s 100% sure
she’s seen his face before,
just before he turns
and says they’ve never met
she repeats their conversation.
Prolific Grace,
has supported her claims
of knowing every face.
Every person I point out
sure enough, she knows their name.
Photographic or otherwise
Grace’s mind is constantly at work
without ever realizing why
she’s committed these people
to her working memory.
I sit amazed,
thinking of her burden
remembering every tiny detail
the minutia just adds up.
Details never escape
her mental grasp.
Grace apologizes
if she’s offended anyone
remembering every word
that’s ever been whispered.
Does this mean
she’s never wrong?
Imagine the conversation
she repeats word for word
it’s impossible and real.
Grace just begs
to simply be forgotten
and not remember
every single word
for word
for word. -
Strung out,
it’s getting harder
to deny certain feelings.
Good knows I’ve tried
a thousand different ways
to block and avoid
those private pictures of you.
The visual trigger in me
you’ve squeezed me
almost too perfectly.
Eyes stare up into eyes
this little gift of yours
where you magically know
exactly what’s going to touch me.
Beautiful you,
you’re somehow growing in me.
That goodness in you,
you’re constantly displaying
means more than anything physical.
I’m learning to be like you,
it’s true you know
how they say
imitation is flattering.
You’re purposefully
putting yourself
out in front of me
next to my broken side,
curled up super close
to the point where
I’ve memorized
every inch of you.
The smell of your love perfume
drawing me up,
even closer still,
I get all protective
yeah, you’re the girl after all.
Glitter on the skin
you’re all over me
you sparkle and shine
under certain lights of course.
I swear,
I’ve never had this part before
where my world
has been this upside down.
You’re some sort
of love-sick potion source.
Ground zero girl
I’ve been trying to avoid
the cure because
I’d rather be infected by you.
I honestly don’t mind,
having you,
course through my veins.
I curse the Gods
for taking so long
because every minute in every day
I crave the touch in you.
You’re becoming more
of a need than want,
I can promise you now
you’d never miss out
on all the golden treasures,
just as long as you promise
never to change
that beauty part
buried in the center
of you love. -
Putting the girl
way up there
high on a shelf
I know I could
keep her safe
from falling off.
I’ll just love her
24 hours a day,
the girl way up there
who’s constantly on display.
It’s hard to explain
how it feels
admiring someone
who gets all this attention
every second
in every day.
She doesn’t mean to be
a distraction,
maybe all these words
are just filling her head.
I can’t help but
shower her with intentions
when she shares
her hard toned curves.
Only she knows
exactly why though
I’d carve all this time
making things
exclusively hers.
The girl
and all her charms,
she’s obviously more
than a pretty face
my odds of one in a million
she’s my perfect one.
Especially when
she’s all curled up
on this,
the shortest day of the year.
Tonight we searched
for the “Jesus Star”
the brightest thing
in the sky tonight.
Impossible because
she was standing here
right next to me though,
singing the words
to our favorite song.
With no real choice
we spun out
underneath the sky above
in uneven circles.
We fell off the edge,
and waited to see
how the other would react
to the broken little pieces
scattered between us.
I love you Grace
there’s no use
hiding this secret now.
Today when you showed me
just how quick
your love can infect,
almost instantly,
my breath was stolen away.
It’s going to take
a lifetime to recover
soon I hope
you’ll come down
off that shelf
way up there. -
The girl is covered
from head to toe
in her professional clothes.
Truly, no one knows
she has this little battle
raging on inside.
A dragon is defending
her Geisha girl,
both stretched across
her polished shoulders.
There’s a serpent twisting down
the side of her rib cage so
when she breathes,
her snake flexes too.
Most times these things
are way too private
to be seen,
unless of course
she’s atop you
in one of her heavy sessions.
Grace had to make sure
her drawings were tattooed
under her professional clothes.
She didn’t want the others to see
she has this other side
where dark colors blend and bleed
into darkness and pain.
I’ve been lucky enough,
I suppose,
to have seen her private parts.
Grace!
Who did you get to put that there?
She loves that funny face
the jealous insecurity of mine.
She laughs,
watching me struggle
thinking someone had their hands
pretty much all over her.
There are even pretty words,
just under her bra-line.
These contrasting beauty marks
are meant to be traced.
I love this girl,
affection is all over her body
down the length of her spine
following her high heels.
I can’t help but stare
at her routine
when she undresses
with her back to me.
Her long feline frame
she does this high stretch
both arms high over head
the cupped curve of her breasts
are there on the edge
she covers when she turns.
I turn and divert eyes
pretending to look
at something on the other side
of her love-strewn room
all soft and sensual.
It’s no use really,
Grace already knows
her voyeur inside
loves when eyes secretly hide.
She knows she’s a beauty source
somethings, she knows she can’t
so easily hide
like her body
of tattoos.
She usually ends the routine
naked, pressed super close
her hands tucked inside.
I squeeze with both arms
keeping her warm
keeping here loved. -
You asked if you could
love me anymore?
What a waste of time
to ask such a thing.
I dare you Grace
do whatever it is
you think you believe.
I already warned you.
Love or otherwise,
you decide,
if you’re ready to risk
Me not returning those words.
Let your feelings out
it doesn’t matter much if
they match mine exactly.
I’ve never seen her smile
as wide as when I landed
squarely in her face
inhaling her made up perfume
mixed from all her exotic oils.
Happy Grace, of course I love
I paused and watched her eyes fall.
You!
It’s what I whisper now
tucked up and from behind
next to her better place
so she can clearly hear me
say her favorite things.
I promised then,
I’d only say them to her
towering high over head
love comes in waves
flooding her world
making it ever so hard
to properly breathe.
Try and lift your chin
above the highest watermark.
Just as the first words come
she lifts her chin and
does this thing with her eyes
giving this hypnotic look
she’s threatening me
I’d better not stop.
Whatever song I was playing
always seems to be the perfect one.
We’re all caught up and mixed
I push harder because
with each new hard syllable
her wanting grows.
She inches forward and rocks
and then jumps on top.
Gone is that nervous grip
her flawless manicured fingers
take on the reigns.
Straddling, slowly at first
hips writhe and slide forward
up and back through each valley
she’s truly riding bareback.
My expert rider
with hands still free to roam
she cups and holds
drawing eyes to her steady moves.
There are no words anymore
riding comes second nature.
There in her favorite position
that smile returns,
just as she presses down
firmly down in one place.
Grace lands the jump
she turns for a second pass
the gallop quickens
she squeezes with her knees
and then all at once
she’s completely relaxed
floating while riding the wave.
Yes, of course Grace
I love you,
just as I smack her ass
she falls forward
both arms draped over
breathing hard and heavy
she mouths,
“Again please.” -
The girl asked about this
“Little Song”
that I promised
I’d write for her.
She wanted to know
each little verse
and if I really would
sing every word.
She asked what instrument I’d use
to accompany my voice
to this, little song.
The girl and her charms
I said I’d start there,
or somewhere in between
the love she shares with me.
I start on the guitar
here’s her song
My Hero
I can’t help but think
you’re the girl for me
I’m just half the man,
until you’re by my side.
You’re my hero,
my little guide
with these superpowers.
You don’t seem to care or mind
when my arm is draped
across your shoulders
we just fit in a way.
My hero
my pretty guide
sensible or otherwise
it seems I’m taken
by your sweet glow
when your eyes
fall in to mine.
My hero
oh hell no
you’re that other half
saying the things
I can’t quite bring
myself to say love.
This line of mine
I’m trying to get out
so I can use my
six foot five frame
to stand tall.
My hero
you’re about the only one
to ever understand
this part of me
that gets all flooded
all trapped within.
You’re not here to judge
it feels like
you’re one big ‘ol dream
that keeps getting tender.
My hero
maybe you’re my surprise
that feeling I get inside
opening the biggest thing
one man could ever think.
You keep giving more
I see all the little things
you do love
without ever expecting
any payback.
My hero
I’m not sure I’ll ever find
a girl like you, love
especially when
I go on writing
songs and poetry
for a girl
that’s nothing more
than my one and only.
You’re the kind of hero
that will listen to this song
and make it your favorite. -
I decided today
I’d write this little song
for the girl I love most.
Maybe she’ll never hear it,
maybe it’ll make her smile
thinking how I feel
she’ll want to hear more of it.
I’m all stupid inside,
drawn to a girl
to her talents and charms
balancing on a wire,
a tightrope way up there.
She’s probably more than my hero
balancing way up there.
Yeah, she’s the one
I can count on
when most others won’t
put forth the effort to add on.
She’s sensible and pretty,
and one of those attributes
really don’t matter,
just as long
she can hang out a while.
Whenever I’m around her
my eyes get all full
I fall all blind
I really can’t help myself
using my hands to see.
This poor girl
having to put up and deal
with these poems.
Maybe this song of hers
will make us millionaires
and in the end
she won’t mind
if I keep up
writing exclusively
about her. -
The temporary mark
written across the sand
fighting the crawling waves,
pulling and reaching
with each hungry grasp.
Endemically eroded away,
the shoreline begs
for someone to scrawl
their name or
some gigantic heart
claiming the day
to be exclusively theirs.
The familiar sounds,
the surf crashes and
it’s almost too cold
to actually go play.
Promise you’ll ignore
the undertow
and go for a swim.
Cut through the surface
dive under each wave.
Lay on your pillow
floating weightless
adrift in a different way
contrast the sunset
way out there
our tiny little dot.
The news came today
you’re lost at sea.
The girl we once knew
probably fought
against every rogue wave.
It’s hard to imagine
why anyone
would go out swimming
especially when
the beaches had been
closed due to storm.
Why would anyone
trust that water?
Especially when
everyone she’s ever known
has drowned
under the weight
of that heavy surf.
I stand here
on the shore
too cautious
to get too close.
I’ll put these words
carefully on paper
and throw them out
in that angry sea.
I hope the girl
is out there,
somewhere,
and gets this
message in a bottle. -
I’m in another one
of those moods,
something is gone.
I’m trying now
to put someone in
the place of the missing.
I cry out for you
you’re deaf now
it’s hard to listen
when your back is turned.
No one blames you
for me and this mood
teetering on an edge.
I’m just as happy
having these words
being the handsome steward.
Oh will anyone
truly understand
the soft and delicate pieces
that are jabbed and stuck
deep inside me.
My mood
never compromised,
never asked if I’d mind
if it could stay
a couple more days
writing down the words
that help explain
the hurt and hurry
the child felt.
Down now,
on broken knees to palms
there are pieces of me
that only a few
will ever understand.
The difference now,
between my mood
and my reflection
the hurt in me comes out
in all these words.
So sit
with your favorite glass in hand
and watch as I
unfold myself. -
Inhale and holding
the thick smell of smoke
surrounds and engulfs,
just as the battle rages
a second day of violence
draws everyone to their places.
We’ve come together
to take and overthrow
we’re set to capture
because I’ve grown tired
waiting on you.
If this were
some other time
we’d already be
in the fight
for our tepid lives.
When I close my eyes
I can only see
the two of us
drawn out in rage
on the battlefield
the one place
we’ve always belonged.
Fight alongside my side
protecting that part
I can’t quite accept.
You are my War hero
getting stronger
with every strike.
Cover me up
shield me from
their screams.
You’re the love
of my life
out on display
on the battlefield.
When you’ve conquered everyone
I’ll be the first one
to lay down
the beautiful weapon
you gave me as a present
and kneel. -
Phoenix eyes,
staring at her prize
she and her narrowly focused gaze,
just ready to fight.
Flames or otherwise
this girl will rise
letting all the pain fall
a victory will heal
her singed wings.
I was the one
who pushed you to fly,
now show us,
the strength you hide inside
you’re our majestic bird.
Pick up your focused eyes
and share the world with us again.
Every tilt of the camera
bringing your magic back.
The rebirth of our Phoenix
this newness has seen
a growth in you.
Let sorrow fall by the wayside,
maybe this time
make the others wait their turn
you’re not here to serve them.
You’re our Phoenix!
Let the smoke and flames
guide that driven side in you.
I’m screaming at the girl
to get up and take flight.
Take chances again
let our eyes
view you again,
before time actually erases
the hope we hold in you.
Rise Phoenix,
rise.
One last time,
dive into the ashes
reclaim confident you.
I promise to be
the first one to fall
on broken knees to palms
and pray to you. -
When the mess requires
using two hands,
the lubrication
gets further inside.
Careful putting
the lid back on
we wouldn’t want
any gel to spill.
Maybe that’s why
we take the long way
whenever we’re in
such a hurry.
We’re actually pretty lucky
to have this chance
now that we’re all lubricated
some would forget to ask
is friction the happy source?
Skin against skin
there in the saddle
hands to curvy hips
weight distribution
evenly pressing the center cup.
Everything has had its purpose
time moves slowly now
make believe or otherwise
one must devote themselves
to give what they expect. -
Time goes against love.
A word we swore to erase
never to be used again.
Just as the hours counted down
we were impossibly drawn
almost forced to use
that dreaded word again.
From behind our closed door
it took only minutes
to strip her completely free.
She loves just standing there
showing exactly where
my hungry mouth
was starving to feed.
I love leaving permanent marks.
Permanent or otherwise,
it’s easy to understand why
she asks for more of this time.
Properly hooked in her corset
pulling the laces so very tight
important the garment fit perfect.
Each of these sharp little tugs
meant her breathing was guarded.
These are the hours she adores
the ones of devoted attention.
She pulls at the the cord
stretched directly over head
lengthening her curvy posture.
On tiptoes she’s perfect and balanced
careful of her manicured toes
she turns using her favorite words.
This is the first of many hours
the girl begs for more time,
inched up against love
she swears come tomorrow
we’ll rewind and
start time over again. -
Her temperamental side
she looks and asks,
are we playing tonight?
From there it made perfect sense
I’d listen to every word,
coming from,
the world’s most perfect girl.
There in a doorway, she stood
with this hungry look
wanting to get started.
I was the only one invited
to join her make-believe world
we’d pretend we were strangers
meeting for the first time.
The girl and her wild side,
always trying to ignite me
in a way that gave her
almost all the control.
She’d dance heavily
with a stranger,
of her choosing.
I watched the unsuspecting one
turn to friends as if,
he’d actually won.
She glanced back
over naked shoulder
to see my tepid reaction.
She’d laugh and push
even harder still,
giving the stranger
more of herself.
Hands squarely on hips
guiding her closer,
she pushes back
checking my eyes as she spins.
The burning was definitely starting
the room had shrunk in size,
just those two,
in a sea of strangers.
With her arousal all satisfied
she dismissed her dancing partner.
To my open lap
she places a fancy kiss,
while locking arms
squarely around my neck.
She whispers her favorite words,
even I can’t believe
her special set of instructions.
Of course I’m paying
special attention now
we need to move on
hurry and get to our spot.
Underneath her moonlit room
she undresses
from her tiny little slip of a dress.
Naked in our room
I watch through a mirror
her cast silhouette
my trigger guide.
Slowly across every button
she peels the layers down
and from behind
she reaches through
putting hands on her curves
she tips my chin and asks,
“Are you better now?” -
This is her first verse,
perhaps her tragic surrender
coming forward from a place
that only she can remember.
The start of her story
is based on one blessed night,
she kissed her stranger
and at that time
only she understood
the impact it would have
on all their lives.
The girl is far removed
from attention’s grasp
holding firmly to her waist
her curves fit perfectly
in the palm of the hand.
Twisting her tiny shirt
her body took on a different form
eyes in front of eyes this time
she swore not to look too long.
The girl has this perfumed scent
mixed from her favorite oils
atop her bathroom counter
impossible to duplicate
she’s the one to turn heads.
Inside the span of this hour
it was unthinkable to move
standing alongside this girl
the path was easy to decipher.
Quietly and perfectly still,
she asks for one simple promise
give nothing more
than what you receive. -
Majestic and or otherwise
the girl listens to Jazz.
I stare and watch every move,
she lifts and tips her glass.
Nothing has ever mattered more,
so she acknowledges the moment
and blows a kiss at last.
I wait for her eyes to return,
she moves to the rhythm,
drawing almost too close at times.
It’s here she whispers
her favorite set of words,
it’s a double-sided question of course
asking if I want to...
Or proclaiming she would like to...
I want her more than anything else.
I swear to the love-sick Gods
thanking them for gifting this one.
The girl and her fractured treasures
a dimple compliments her pretty smile.
She’s truly my one and only.
Her beauty is easy to memorize
along with her sensitive charms.
I would easily accept her curse
pandemic or otherwise,
I’d spend every waking moment
sharing every breath with her.
There are no masks this time around
afraid I’d miss her perfumed body.
This, the majestic girl
who loves listening to music
has a way of infecting my world.
I can feel her body come closer
she asks for my answer,
“Well?”
I scooped her up into the air
not sure of her reaction,
my smile mirrored hers
she clutched even tighter.
The music stopped
we didn’t care
being void
of all the strangers. -
Standing underneath
a grove of autumn trees
the girl and her charms
compliment each other.
One can’t really tell
where the sky begins,
all that I can confess,
I can only stare.
There are certain words
that are often whispered
a thousand different ways of course.
I watch as she steps
the ground sits convered
in the most colorful of leaves.
Her arms are straight down
twisted around her sides,
her legs slightly crossed,
the girl admires her voyeur.
She’s in her anemic blouse
see-through or otherwise
it’s still her favorite time of year.
So what exactly
has caught my eye?
Her amazing horse cropped boots,
tall, and at a perfect height.
I swear to the Gods
this girl and her designs,
she’s incredibly accessorized
with thick chunky bracelets,
one on each wrist.
With summer now gone and faded
her eyes are rich and full.
Autumn and this beautiful attraction
from under the trees I stare,
the girl and her illustrious colors
the reds, greens, golds and blue.
I swear once again,
if love were my companion
doubt would be my stranger. -
Out on the couch
the fire is too hot,
she gives herself a toast
to new beginnings.
Her glass is full of ice
it’s there to cool
her temperamental side.
That side where,
she’s a seductive scientist
creating the chemistry
drawing me to her.
I owe her now
for putting these images
deep inside my mind.
Seductively,
she’s always so quiet
I honestly can’t tell anyone
how she gave me
this fresh set of eyes
where everything
is still so blurry.
She’s comfortably loyal,
she didn’t used to be
the girl who is happy
her color keeps changing.
This previous season
held her super close.
Available to love,
the choice,
has always been mine
to cut and bleed
or offer up a drink
a glass with ice.
Thirsty and wanting
the outside again
I can’t help,
so I fall in line instead.
Arms are set
for recovery
it’s always safe
to collide
alongside her.
Her beauty always wins
each and every time
I see her there
that super cute
tiny little skirt of hers
hands clasped firmly behind.
She’s so elusive
always trying to pretend
she has stopped
trying to compare
the blessings.
I’m not as pretty as her,
it’s easy to try
to love her,
at best
all one could ever expect
is to always say her name,
just before,
going to bed.
I’m too tired
to finish
what I screwed up
the first time. -
This is my early hour
standing alongside
a bitter night,
just as I’ve always done.
The sun is on the verge
of staging another battle
I try to keep the moon
from her bitter rival.
Oh what I’ve done?
The early songbirds
are getting ready to sing,
perhaps this is the morning
the jealous moon
has already won.
From the heavens
to our beloved Gods
I glance at the hour,
I swear she swore,
“Just a couple of days”
she promised.
I won’t believe her anymore,
for today I am love sick
and in heavy withdrawal.
Time is freezing cold
I look and wonder
are you still reading my poems?
I’m no stranger to love
these words of hers
have been building.
Slowly over time
I still undress her
with my naked eyes,
I stand here in clothing
wanting to devour the girl.
The last time we spoke
she let out this laughter
and I had to whisper,
“Fuck, if I’m not in love.”
Sitting closer now
against a tiny space heater
I dare not move
away from its precious tendrils.
I’m all
caught up in her now
fighting against
the frigid cold.
Oh spare me this hour
spare me her love
I defy her pull,
if I am to be the sun
and she my moon
I’ll sit huddled now
until it gets warmer.
I’ve almost an hour left
my eyes draw weary
shall I deny them
thy rest?
I draw my strength
from pen and paper,
even if it were
just virtual
blogging paper. -
If in a day
I saw you love
I could easily pretend
to ignore your love.
Would you
continue to be
my one and only?
I implore you love
to choose your one,
either way,
just say the words
or remain silent
just as you’ve done.
I can very easily
remain in my world
simply to be a fool
and write how much
I love you.
I dare those words
come across your lips,
if truly,
you are the girl
I’m supposed to love.
I can easily pretended
to hold your hand
while dressing you
in the finest of clothing.
Will you deny
your eyes their look?
I say you will
remain all stoic
and brewing.
All of this
has been said before
I’ve done the math
close to 20,000 days
5,282 poems.
It’s just now
that I’ve properly begun
to access my handsome words
and maybe,love
may not be
for you. -
I wonder if
you’ll truly laugh,
like how you did
when you were barefoot
walking on our muddied path.
Are you that same silly girl
that could remember
a thousand words
and then recite them
in no time flat.
I ask this of you
simply because
I’m starting to forget
just how and why exactly
I ever fell in love.
Yesterday,
you had one of your days
and I don’t mind,
honestly,
I wish you could
find a way
to include me.
Imagine if,
I shunned you
or pretended to use
a make believe name.
Would you still
chase me
across a crowded room?
I say to you
pick your own
flower today
and start to count
by plucking each of its petals,
“Do you love him?
Or do you not?”
That’s what
Love is…
-
Crushed black velvet
her favorite color
against her dark corduroy.
This oversized sweater coat
a double wrapped covering
around her kind of curvy waist.
Two very large buttons,
hide the girl
all hidden away.
First things first,
or her first expression to me
always making sure
“Are you ok?”
Dressed up tonight
against the bitter cold
biting ferociously down
taking pieces of her.
I’m jealous for sure
this one garment
hugging and holding tightly
to every part of her.
She asks,
Do you want to come
inside right now?
She and her double-sided words,
lay strewn all over the floor.
Her eyes wonder why
I question her meaning
when she asks,
if I’d like to come inside?
She reminds me
of an assassin
getting ready to leap.
I beg her
to play on
down this tepid path of hers,
she teeters,
almost forgetting
I love her
underneath her half smile.
She takes my sensitive arm
grabbing firm and hard
she’s mine.
This particular girl
who would rather freeze
in order to wear this coat
She would never volunteer
for an easier
chain of words,
tied tightly to her wrist,
as if she were blind
and needed a guide.
My beautiful stranger
is never alone
always getting offers
She’d prefer I just flirted.
Unsure how to navigate
especially at a time
when she’s had
way too too much to drink.
I honestly don’t mind
being her late night driver
keeping her arm
safely in mine. -
Can you hear me?
I get the fever has a hold on her
I have drowned inside myself
trying not to use her exact words.
I’m comfortable being vague
meaning nothing to her
from the outside at least.
I’ve long since washed her away,
my mind is stuck and spinning
she was technically my first
to get all hung up on.
I’m sure it’s a sign or something,
but I keep silent.
Come here finish what you started,
press both hands on my shoulders
keep me under the surface longer
until it’s too much
to properly breathe.
I’m begging her
start all over with me,
just this time though
push me away with both hands.
She’s the only one
I’ve ever gotten this sick with,
somehow I wish,
she could undo this curse.
I’ve tried this praying thing,
I’m convinced I’m possessed,
I constantly hear her voice
tortured by her
I trip and stumble
on broken knees to palms
in love with an imperfect girl
my imperfect memory
she’s my equal mistake.
Maybe things will never change.
I’ll just be sick
with her name
filling up my mouth.
It’s hard to breathe now.
She never meant to be my burden
I can’t get rid of this fever
I thought for sure I was immune
I’m fucked if I see her picture
stuck memorizing
the very thing I once held.
Hands can barely remember
how good her hips fit.
I didn’t think I’d need her now
knowing how I feel
I thought I had everything.
Wasted time sits heavily,
I’m in an imperfect world
where I can easily
smell her perfume.
From underneath a full night
her kisses were my weightless truth
I couldn’t get enough of,
but even with my strong arms
I wish I kept her closer.
This is the hour
that matters most.
I can’t use my words,
or say the things,
that gave us this condition.
Somehow I have to finish this
new block of feelings.
I understand this poem is way too long
I keep going on and on over her
without mentioning her name
or how she felt.
The part that fit so seamlessly
we’d go in and take turns
trying to mend the broken parts,
ever so slowly,
I can keep on writing
and what’s worse,
I know she secretly comes here
and reads every word
in every verse.
My peverted vouyer
getting off on all my words
that make up this,
poetic part,
that can’t quite stop
and put her away
on some forgotten shelf.
No, I’m the one
that’s never cold now,
burning of fever
from a girl
who is long gone. -
Even if, I could stand
far away from her
she’d still insist I come
closer to her because
she wants to hear me
read her favorite books.
Nighttime air
she loves to lie here
half dressed sometimes,
just to make sure
my eyes still wander.
There’s more to her
I can honestly swear
she keeps me up
talking all night.
The girl is my first stop
I beg her to love me twice,
she says she’s prepared
to be my path and power.
I’m not exactly sure
what she means,
but it sure makes me smile. -
The girl has spent weeks now
learning the new rules
with more of the lessons still to go,
it was time to show what she knew.
Instructions were as simple as
Time and Attention are yours,
unsure, but confident inside
in to the gathering she strode.
First, an older gentleman holding coins
asking her to choose,
with both his palms extended out
in one was gold the other silver
the girl thought for a moment.
She reached and took the silver one
and placed it in his pocket,
he wasn’t her one,
so the girl moved on.
A woman holding fruit in a basket,
“Please my dear, choose one.”
the girl went so far as to feel each one,
in the center a luscious apple
slowly bringing it to her lips
the girl watched the woman
take a bite from its center.
Time to move on
this beautiful man with stained fingers
she immediately stopped to proclaim,
“Yes, he is my chosen One!”
“Time and attention
“My kind Sir, is yours if you want.”
The above is Dominant/submissive lesson. I’d instruct; Tell me why the girl made the choices she did and would you make the same choice, why or why not. Write an email with perfect grammar and punctuation so that we may discuss.
The lifestyle is not always those stupid red balls in the mouth or barking orders at someone.
Enjoy Everyone.
-
I can clearly see
where it is
you’re coming from.
You’re my one true hero
not some bitter man
that can’t let go.
I love when unspoken words
are truly left unopened.
I can’t wait to be picked back up,
so I can rest in your hands.
I close my eyes and wish on you, love.
Asking seems not to matter
I don’t mind being a fool
the others say you’re not coming.
I know how far I’d go
following you from town to town
asking anyone who will listen
if they’ve seen my hero.
You are my pretty man,
I might be asking for a miracle
please say you’ll come home
I can hear footsteps,
but even if,
I can’t tell if you’re approaching,
or leaving me again
I’ll stay right here.
It makes no difference
because heroes never chose
where they’re wanted most.
I can feel the power in hands,
this place next to me, extended
I’m taken, for now anyways.
I’ll be the better man
and be your hero
for a little while longer anyways,
until you find your footing
and become my hero again. -
From the inside
time settles and begins to count out loud.
This backwards counting clock
looking backwards, is not looking back.
Over a polished pristine shoulder
I know there’s no use in going back
there’s no hope in changing you.
So little sleep for now,
just tiny naps to keep us barely safe
far from a hallucinating edge.
It’s hard to remember how it felt
when we were struggling with fever
that out of control passion
gnawing at us like some hungry dog.
The misery when one is alone
there’s nothing left but to surrender,
give in and drink from the blessed cup.
Consequences can come tomorrow
a place that is so far removed from now
we’re young enough to not care anymore
happy to tragically die alone
to meet up in the afterlife.
Broken words are sung with sincerity
even if, half the words are forgotten
because we can’t quite remember
how love was to be truly played out.
We once swore to love and cherish
don’t worry about being pretty now
fall on your already swept floor
the razor sharp edges are dull now.
Crawl to your one true and safe corner
where you lie in order to hold hands.
I don’t mind if I’m beneath you
I’m here to always offer my shoulders
because I can easily carry you
wherever it is you need to go. -
Cupid has made a final purchase
a state of the art bow.
This high powered beauty.
A bow that’s gaurunteed
to pierce through anything.
Anyone foolish to stand near him
will surely feel his arrow.
Especially that golden beauty
the one with the glamorous shine.
Cupid and his carbon fiber bow,
super lightweight and easy to load,
he can go all day
without ever getting tired.
He’s never missed his intended mark.
Bullseye there in the sweet spot.
You, with your tough exterior
be prepared to go down,
or are you already wounded?
No worries love,
we have a handful of extra bandages
sure to get you back on your feet
because this season is gonna hurt.
Love comes in different ways of course
don’t pretend this is nonsense
because some sit with envy
constantly looking over their shoulder
wanting the bouquet you now hold. -
Small are the openings
when the quiet good times
are where we look before we fall.
Everybody has a certain way
why they look, how they look
from the inside out,
even the flawed are all pretty.
Yesterday, when you actually looked,
taking the time to act,
like you were some-what interested
from the inside this time
you were pretty then too.
Maybe you’ll never fade before me,
let me know,
when you need more of me
before you let my hand go.
I could bankrupt that part in you
that asks in all the different ways,
I think I’m the only one
who would let you fall,
so I could land safely on top of you.
I swear when we swore,
we’d put eyes up into eyes
no matter how many hours it required
making up our near perfect plan.
Here we are today
with no room left on paper
it’s time we act
to let it all out and confess
love in front of strangers
they honestly don’t care
what fools we make of ourselves,
just as long as we move. -
With these late thoughts
wondering where you’ve gone,
perhaps I’m the one,
lost, while wading around in this room.
A space that is vacant, yet cramped.
I’ve come to memorize every inch
there’s barely enough space
for my thoughts to gather properly.
First light comes this morning,
that eye opening moment
where you find the actual place
you’ve been placed all along.
Flooded with a last poem
I promise to change the chase now
I’m too exhausted to ask again,
I guess I’ll read about your outcomes,
or how it was,
when you turned out in the end.
The easier dream if ever there was
has been letting go of the one promise
writing close to 400 poems
that went mostly ignored.
Sure you glanced over your shoulder
flicking the tiny pests
to leave you alone.
Quite honestly,
I’m relieved to put this away
misfortune has never been
this sorrowful part of me.
Different shadows ask for my thoughts
my attention has turned for now
because I can’t quite understand
how being all silent
was ever justified,
especially since,
I would of paid to hear your voice.
Perhaps the price was paid
like some drunken slumber
I spoke too harshly in my sleep
when you actually heard
my guarded inner voice.
-
I can’t wait to run up to the girl
the one who’s currently
giving herself away,
some could say for free.
The thrill in the sex hours,
lost somewhere in my head
I was thinking about forever,
it’s been some time since
we sat across one another
avoiding those judgmental eyes
that can’t seem to understand my side.
She’s always fought with me
to get back on track.
She says the right start is oh so critical.
In her eyes anyway,
and since I can’t quite sleep anymore
she’s all I care about right now.
Hooking up is a thrill,
she makes me pledge
swear on this super strict allegiance,
never to share this world with others,
this, tender flexing bond that’s in us.
With no interruptions,
I quickly sign her document
some could say is unconventional.
Anyway, I’m ahead again,
she’s firmly stuck in my head
it’s worth repeating.
She adores trying to figure us out,
come and play with me
aggressively in bed and stuff
pin her perfect set of shoulders, firmly.
She begs and wants to be proper
in a way that comes across
like some naturally occuring act.
Love naturally happens
that powerful lustful wanting
clouding all good judgement
my muse is showered in attention.
Maybe you the reader,
haven’t been properly taken.
Compare that inner filter
that voice that balances you
from slipping, making certain choices.
To one day waking up
being completely void and missing
like you ever knew it was there at all.
You can’t quite judge us anymore,
the right from wrong anymore,
especially when you look back
and your old self is so unrecognizable
there’s no more making sense
of time and attention anymore.
Your mind is flooded looking back
with that one person who’s allowed
to do whatever, however, they choose.
It’s hard to listen to this message
be careful how you
give yourself away for free now,
especially now since
time is so fucked up.
My advice,
get ahead again
make you the priority of self,
start healing yourself,
from this day forward
no more stupid mistakes
we both know
you’re so willingly
going to make. -
The early years are so easily wasted
the spent lovers lie in the naked streets.
Bodies hang loosely over each other,
a bitter taste of nicotine stains their lips.
Still, those two crave even more
much more than the other can give.
There has been light constant rain
calling for their kissing hour to start.
Heavily inside her mouth,
she moves her tongue against the girl
they somehow press softly into the other
this is will be there cherished moment
while fingertips so effortlessly trace.
She swears like never before,
underneath their sheltered blanket
they start to take turns.
Where one has hands made of feathers,
and a body that is barely there, and still
she begs to be scooped up
to be completely taken.
While the other may have clumsy hands
accidentally catching or pulling hair,
her round curves are but perfection
clumsy or inexperienced matters little now.
One cannot predict how this will end.
Time and attention
they will forever swear
lying drunk and naked
isolated in each other’s arms.
-
The day I wrote my first poem
every inch of my soul
was still buried under this deep soil.
With miles more still to go,
I’ve kept on writing these poems
posting a string of non-stop words,
some could argue they make little sense,
while others have spent hours
digging themselves even further down.
Then there are the devoted few,
following me through every inch.
Here on the surface now, my soul rests.
I’m not quite down there yet, instead,
there are joyful moments of change
otherwise stripped away and explained.
I must admit I love the admirers,
the way in which each person inspects
walking around the poetic corners
careful of the layered edges.
Even when I pine away about a girl
every new poem is like my first,
I’ve gotten wickedly good
at whispering words,
just on the edge of her jaw and ear.
With a deep and hungry sigh
the girl confesses for time not to stop,
in fact, she’ll beg to hold the position.
Underneath her bright little smile
it’s now easy to understand why
I have no other real choice,
but remember why I must write
and get it all down. -
After all,
today is the moment of truth,
with no two ways about it,
it’s getting harder and harder
this thing I’m trying to explain.
There are some girls who complain
about people and their reactions,
like an obvious infection,
that’s sometimes hard to expel.
So perhaps this irrational love feature,
most likely genomed in the male DNA
simply can’t be taken away.
From the start and inside that garden
a girl found herself in Eden
where she unfairly took the blame
for eating a forbidden fruit.
All that I’m saying,
instead of fighting,
this love inside,
give in and make him
go get the apple
so we can see if the girl
can truly refuse to eat.
I’m sure her cunning
will make it impossible
for us to truly know
if she really ever would
commit to taking a bite. -
Trying to see her for myself
in a crowd of strangers.
I’m over here,
trying to get close again.
I can’t quite move forward,
there’s too much glass on the floor
and I swore I swept earlier before.
Trying to avoid the shards now,
I can’t quite afford getting cut on this
her deliberate voice today.
The ground doesn’t matter anymore.
Glass unswept or otherwise,
her voice hasn’t changed, still stubborn.
Softer in other tones,
I’m always wanting to get close to her,
cautious of the impassable corners.
Caught up in getting caught up for now
I can’t imagine walking away from her,
time sits underneath the skin.
These scars of love sit so guarded and
it’s not like how we were when young
pretending on having this future life.
Suddenly the floor has washed away.
We have so much more life to support,
maybe all I ever missed in her
was the voice in her after all.
-
From the start of yesterday
words were coming to the surface
there for a second, but then soon gone.
The Utopiangirl had reappeared,
and with little or no real notice
she was tucked up in her usual position.
Her pristine favorite place,
and even though she hates that word
there’s something about her pain
that far outweighs my brokenness.
So she’s here on the eve my surgery
by luck or chance, she stands straight up
waiting to take her place again.
Dutifully the next morning,
she’s there making sure things went ok.
She asks without ever truly asking
if I’d take her hand and dance again.
Not sure for how long or to what song
her thoughts take her all over the place
even though she’s equally matched
it’s time we leap.
She likes the chance of being noticed.
A true Utopiangirl, half committed
she handed over her instruction booklet,
every word clearly spelled out
like the contracts of old.
I, on the other hand, could only write
time and attention as my request.
She laughed, kissed on tiptoes
and said, and I quote, “Fine.”
First things first, we’re starting slow
she gave that wrinkled nose look,
I said, and I quote, “Sure.”
-
The girl said to improve,
a girl with a perfect smile
has always expected better, after all,
she’s still my favorite drug.
Up and under the garden gate
there is no outward love
she’s always inward and guarded.
The Queen still giving commands
on the edge of this hour
waiting to read something
she’d actually like.
I may not have the words anymore,
that focused light,
perhaps extinguished and gone.
Who knows, I could start anew
ripping a flower from the ground
I pull the petals and count
she loves me! Who am I kidding,
she’s never really loved.
I pull again, she loves me not,
and that sounds more like it,
I smile and pick again,
she loves me! Words she refuses to use.
A handful of petals this time,
she cannot love.
The flower now sits exposed
anemic with no more color.
I toss the stem on the ground
she asked what the flower said,
and with no real answer
I go back to the field
and pick again.For My Uptopiangirl. Love you.
-
Most of us write on this,
single Saturday,
when things have gotten all mixed up.
We’re supposed to be the ones
who take notice
and write it all down
picking up on things,
most others have missed or forgotten.
Unfortunately my attention
doesn’t quite span
the chasm between us now.
You’re way up there
high on a hill where
I can’t quite climb the walls
keeping you free from contamination.
I want to show up
kiss how we used to,
so I could rush and write
something broken and pretty.
On this single Saturday though
we aren’t supposed to
co-mingle or gather
with friends or otherwise.
I’m counting on you
disappear leaving everyone behind
so what if the corners have changed,
I miss how we used to
just know what the other thought.
Before this lockdown was enforced
time was free and taken for granted
we didn’t really think about
how we looked while wearing a mask.
Time sits imprisoned now,
buried in heartache
I hate not seeing you.
The chances of catching
just a single glimpse
from this place we once knew
I guess, would be enough,
until we were given permission
to go ahead and meet up on this
single Saturday. -
The fever swears
fingers grip and clutch hard,
it’s getting impossible to breathe.
A better way is out there somewhere
still, we can’t turn, not until
we have a satisfactory answer.
Would you mind
if we prayed together?
Come join me on sensitive elbows
recite words about heaven
that glorious supposed better place,
I’m here to argue
this is where you belong.
Here on earth
where so many things are wrong
your work isn’t done
too many hurt
they haven’t quite felt
how it feels when you look in eyes.
For the first time
I don’t mind telling you
you’re selfish if you leave us
we’ll clutch and pray even harder
if it meant you’d stay longer.
Even when there’s no reason
you should just stay longer
because I can’t breathe
when I go searching for you
I hyperventilate trying to find you.
Believe me when I say
this is not your big escape.
The strength in us,
all of us, trying to keep you.
We’re here locked arm in arm
stumbling over each hour.
None of us truly know
how to properly pray
but we take turns
trying to convince you
to just stay. -
Even on a perfect day
there are moments to remember,
from the start of it all
it’s hard to feel brand new
when everyone expects the same outcome.
Come hold my my hand,
I’ll show you
there is this place
far from what you’re thinking.
I can only count on myself
so I’ve seen things differently
down on broken knees to palms
I’d love to show you this other side.
Kneel next to me,
so we can pretend to pray,
pray in their way with head down
chanting the same old lyrics.
Tonight I want you to see
we could give life to other words,
so in other words,
I want to show you an exotic world
from the back row of the church.
Rows and rows of busy seats
sit so unused and ready
with plenty of room.
I’m begging you,
come explore every inch
back there where no one cares
if you want to dance,
that dance of yours.
Let hips move around the psalms
I’ll be sure to focus the light,
until we hear,
the church bells explode
killing the quiet night.
When midnight stirs,
we’d be free to escape
like the biggest rush
running through filling streets,
of course we’d tiptoe behind the crowds,
who were wondering
exactly who
had used their church. -
Sentimental pictures
we work hard on capturing
most times, love sits somewhere else.
We’re often missing
that one stance or pose
always trying to line things up.
Come sit with me
here in this sterile room,
in real terms,
where we could trade ideas.
All we ever really wanted
was to be truly needed
to be in love.
Open your better set of eyes
negotiate your path differently
with reckless abandon
there are no consequences.
Think about never having to ask
for the very thing you want,
and if by chance we slip up
we can always get an exact replica
with no questions asked.
If I let you get under my skin
would you promise to go to work
go to the damaged places
stop at nothing to fix and mend
be my very own skilled surgeon.
You could make me automatic,
I’d be able to answer your questions
with no hesitation,
I’d spit information.
Maybe then, it would be a match,
a day in which
everything would naturally fall in
its a perfect place to me.
So what if we don’t understand
the consequences of reprogramming
we’d already know everything
in the span of that one handsome day
we could be in love
forget yesterday,
and then tomorrow
reset the code
start over. -
The mystery and connected clues
spread out here before us,
too cautious, and you’re sure to miss out.
With summer now almost gone
come count these last hours down.
On tiptoes looking up, always looking up
from where bellies undulate
hands sway on curves and hips
the heavy air insists remove clothes.
There on the side of the budding wave
she holds her practiced position well,
from dreamt up memories
every step, every move
these autumn days are now set in stone.
Crawl forward to get attention
the edge begs to look and see
sliding deep inside her
slow and cautious
the temptation teases.
A hooked foot guides the movement
firm at first, almost as if, she is the first.
Eyes are buried up into eyes
on a makeshift bed of pillows
there’s always something
when hips move in unison.
From behind, that foot hooks again,
setting the temperature mood.
The upturned points are all sensitive
words flick and gently bite
a squeeze a second too long
the floor falls from underfoot
the tepid wave finally crashes,
and with seconds still left,
sensitive eyes look up and lock
before the end of summer
is completely awash and gone. -
The upstart girl
void of stars in the eyes,
she needs to be hated
to feel good inside.
She’ll push us aside
because she doesn’t want to feel
we need her
she’ll make the perfect excuse why
we need to up and leave her.
It will never matter how we feel
when we fell in love,
she can’t help us.
The girl needs no one
and yet, she has more friends
than the rest of us combined.
She spends most nights
selectively going through
the songs that make her dance
when she’s high and drunk.
Still, there are easy things
she prefers we watch someone else,
just the select few are allowed
to gather around and witness
her most cherished side.
With eyes squarely on her
the one in a million girl
that no one hasn’t really noticed
can’t quite get to the place
where she can return
the love and devotion shown.
It would be better if,
you just got up and turned
run away before
your eyes settled on hers. -
The first of the four nights,
she dreams of the warm winds
and by clockwork they start.
Starting out slowly at first,
she walks barefoot enjoying the change
half of her looks at the horizon,
while that other side,
sees something coming over shoulder.
Heavily and on purpose
she loves and embraces change fully,
barely wearing anything of course
the girl begs for the winds to continue
wrap their hands around her.
That second night,
she dances in the music
it’s almost too loud,
too much coming too soon
she stumbles a bit
no one has taken any notice.
The girl and those hips,
she sips from 20 year old bottle,
with this luscious enviable mouth,
some start to notice her new look
her full figure struggles in the gusts.
The winds have gotten stronger
hands reach out and grab her,
she pushes back and stumbles
for a second time now
the third night starts out much different
instead of dancing by herself,
she wants the company of others
and from all sides and angles
the girl explores her darker side,
that unwanted side of hers
where she doesn’t deserve his love,
tortured by years of reading
and it’s only the third night.
Come morning, the winds are dangerous
everything is ripped and torn,
objects pass with deadly accuracy
roofs are torn from foundations,
still, she swears she understands
for a second there,
the skies quiet and open up,
everything is perfectly normal.
It’s just her touch we’ve ever wanted
but before she has time to reach
everything is permanently taken,
there’s no more hiding,
she stands in a field of debris
a bruised and damaged yard
where once there were houses.
The fourth night starts in chaos,
this terrible screaming howl is gone.
It’s a dead quiet silence,
standing there by herself,
she screams for someone
to come take her.
There in the belly of night
her dream lover fills every void,
the fire in her voice is quenched.
Down on knees and palms,
she’s finally satisfied.
The end of the fourth night,
she starts all over,
she picks herself up
heads to the beach with her kite. -
In the idle darkness
answers trickle to the surface
for now though,
one can’t breath underwater.
It’s getting easier
taking tiny sips of air,
no one hasn’t really noticed yet,
I was punched in the gut.
Forever is unlike anything else.
On the edge of relaxed dreaming
coming back to count and ask
a feeling like I want
to laugh and cry again.
Everything is coming all at once.
No one knows the inside
especially since,
we stopped speaking
like we took some
fucked up vow of silence.
Sometimes we need to be alone
I get that, I’ve had enough.
It’s the voice on the inside
saying words like;
a forever love, for always and ever, the one who completes and on and on.
Every other day
I swear and curse at the nothingness.
It’s hard to ignore
this clear and simple wish inside.
Wanting, the ache to go away
erase all thought, almost as if,
I never asked to be kissed.
Spending hours now trying to
re-glue the inner-brokenness,
when it’s no use really,
hands aren’t steady enough
to perfectly align
the tiny faults and cracks.
Oh this will never go away
along with the filter-less voice
that keeps reminding how
this is the hour where a vase inside
will shatter and break
on an already swept floor. -
I am tempted to call you my lover,
but those are just words
pretty and stunning
the perfect girl.
I want to reach and trace
pull her into position
that submissive space
where everything is negotiated.
There are required requirements
where we exist in equal measure
we balance both brain and might
start a set of lessons.
Learn how to train the ache of emotion
so certain words can become triggers
a prehistoric need to please of course.
Most won’t understand how it works
one can wear a collared leash
and still have a stronger voice.
The feline obeys,
down on knees to palms
eyes in their expected place,
warm and tempted for sure.
She begs and asks all the same,
please, if it’s what you wish.
A perfectly placed palm
leaves a welted mark,
she braces and pushes back
wanting more of the sting
ice is dripping down and inside.
She falls on elbows
raising her ass even higher still,
and from behind,
she hears her favorite string of words.
A command she must answer
nudged by the slightest pinch
she centers to focus her words
and from over her shoulder
she answers him. -
Under a temperamental sky and all
Violet woke to a burning smell
her love had escaped and gone.
An out of control feeling was free,
she found today to be dangerous
hard to just breath in.
Violet knew,
she belonged to one,
she pulled her hair tightly in place,
here to face the devil alone
fight or flight she told herself,
as smoke were filling her lungs.
Violet did not know of need
still, he quieted her mood
by making her look at the moon.
Last night’s nighttime sky
was now set on fire,
by an unusual August storm
she spread her fingers.
Again, time and attention was calling.
She silently screamed for him,
by noon, she swore at the heat
cursing love from her veins.
She caught sight of the flames
her glance fell on their garden
the silhouette of smoke and shadow
covered her once pristine greenhouse
sure to be destroyed, betrayed.
She sunk to her knees, ashamed.
Gone are her hours in the lessons,
the dedication to Plato’s cave, erased.
In complete ruin, her punishment.
It’s hard to catch a breath
Violet smears the soot from eyes
she blinks and sighs for the last time
under this, crimson evening sky,
she’ll stay and fight
her horizon looms heavy on shoulders
an even angrier sun is about to rise.
The 24th hour with no sleep
in the orange glow and haze
Violet froze, for there he stood
trying to free the large animals
set free to escape
Violet quite literally
ran and leapt to his chest
knocking them to the ground,
and before he could say the words
she buried the deepest first kiss.
Violet’s Fire,
had taken everything away
there in the smoldering ash
she had made her promise
“yes, I am yours.” -
She adores having hands
taking control over her affections,
she’s somewhat lost
when it comes to hand holding.
With fistfuls of hair
she reaches and grabs
securing the very steps
that will steady her.
She raises her voice because
certain words have avoided her
she looks at her parents
that everlasting everything
escapes her.
She grips and holds on
to the words that come
from her wicked little tongue.
She trusts her beauty
will always call them to her
the summer of love making
she spends every moment
thinking how every minute
belongs only to her.
She’s forgotten how
her forever
has a way of twisting
the insides of others.
She looks back on that path
she still listens to songs
that help with her memory.
It’s still early in the moment
she truly feels it’s her time to shine
to truly fall in love.
Her today lover
has much to be thankful for
yesterday when she was learning
she held her breath
lost in our outspoken world.
Today she turns,
thinking of how her forever
has so much left… -
A grown man’s shadow
stands alongside her
the lucky girl sings to celebrate
quietly to herself
she turns to her sensitive side
and thinks
about the person who loves her most.
Inside a set of pretty words
these are the undulating poems
a forgotten language of course
that somehow wrap around her
holding tightly to her swaying hips,
while everyone else
can only stare.
The heavy bass sounds
coming from
the surf line rhythm
every other beat thumps hard
he prefers to be alongside her.
Her and that smile,
void of any words
the coastal fire burns
against these nightly bonfires
they spend hours in them.
Sparks beg to rise
released up into that night sky
pinpoints and her perfect kisses
she tiptoes and pulls him down.
Centered and focused
whispers are placed hard
at the point where water recedes
waves pillow on top of each other.
Bare feet make their marks
silhouette of lines
she draws in the sand
from shoulders and hips
she slips from all clothing
wading in the summer surf.
She begs for company,
but quite honestly,
the darkened water feels
all too dangerous.
She dives just underneath
her mermaid-like moves,
hips break the surface
she floats there all still
the hours of body sculpting
are showing.
Buoyant love making,
she swears and promises,
hands are allowed to explore
her warm curves
night swimming
until morning. -
Trying to outshine the outside light
on this, the special night.
I came forward and asked
would you mind if,
we sang in the dark?
We could trip and fall on top of
our perfect melody and all.
You’re so fucking beautiful.
I’ll carry you out across
whatever stage you choose,
my beloved superstar
with gold matching ringlets
everyone wants a piece of you.
We can stand here arm in arm
ignoring the long forgotten shadows,
just you with me because
you’re our brilliant guide.
The girl with a different side
of course we can kiss for an hour
spending heaps of our favorite hours
spoon sleeping together.
Let’s just lay here for a while
there is something about
when you pretended
we are untouched strangers
blind to love and that drunk side,
you let this girlish scream out
for that second, you’re weightless
I lift you up and in
we start falling all over again. -
The first and only look,
a one time glance coming from
the part of this girl
that pains her to stare.
The temperature code,
she swears,
she’s seen this look before,
tired of turning away
eyes are properly set up
inside of another hour
we don’t mind paying her price.
When she dances,
her perfume smothers the floor
and from the start of this
she’s spread herself all over and
it’s getting hard
to turn her down anymore.
The temperature code,
sits heavily underneath us both,
where a full moon keeps dripping
I can’t remember how or why
this girl got so close inside.
Here she is, none the less
we spend the night
against a set of hours that
take us back to a time
where we tripped and fell
landing perfectly
on an already made bed.
Eyed just very naturally stared,
without words this time
there with the perfect girl and
our temperature code. -
Accidental or otherwise
she was dancing as per usual
wearing mismatched socks,
pretty much nothing else
could divert my eyes from her.
I swore I wouldn’t
let her show up again
like some well meaning stranger
showing me this new move or step.
Innocent or otherwise
I may as well admit
I’ve signed myself over to her.
The night enveloped and twisted
she bragged and I listened
about her body structure photographs.
These miniature sets of strangers
traveling all over and across
her sensitive places.
There was something about
my insecure reaction
watching their hands touch her all over.
She’s always been in love
with my child-like sensitive side,
that’s only evident with her.
The harder I try and ignore her
she shows up hula hooping
in mismatched socks, in love
with beautiful you.
-
Heavy hands,
wanting that girl back,
in this, the playful season
the summer of 2020.
That cold insensitive look
coming from the girl
wearing black lipstick.
The night skies are all warm
perfect for keeping the windows open
and this is how the day starts
trying to beat the sunrise.
It’s summer now,
the girl is miserable
she never felt comfortable enough
showing off her size 8 curves.
With just one month to go,
I miss Ms.,
here on the back of another long day
I honestly don’t mind missing her
the craving is appreciated
here in my own memory fog
I’ve forgotten why
she left in the first place.
With summer more than half over,
I wouldn’t mind if,
it started all over again.
Soon she’ll return
move all her things back in
her dark and moody disposition
taking up more and more room,
but to be fair,
she’s an unbelievable giver
it’s a perfect hand in glove feeling.
I’ll put this away
and look forward to her return,
just as soon as summer is over. -
There on the edge
a blanketed room quickly filled,
she stood there, fists at the ready.
Cheering to the punches
she squarely landed the blows
front page news, she was in love
and she took every possible chance
to bring her opponent down.
Looking in awe at the display
modern barbarism at play here
she was the winner at last
had the black eye to prove it
walking away arm in arm
she swore she could have gone on
tonight was the night
Love won.
-
The biggest candlelit eyes,
locked while staring up,
she’s counting out loud again
waiting on the exact amount
drugs clutched in tightly
she takes my arm,
you’re stuck with me
she jabs the needle downward.
Romance has always been kind
poison lipstick and all
we’ll kiss these feelings away
tonight will be dangerous.Going all in on a girl,
one who hates making promises
she has convinced me this time
a million times over please,
there has to be some other place
private where we can be alone.
Kneeling next to her perfume
a scent I’ve long since memorized.
I’m stuck with you, I say to her,
applying a shade in the mirror
holding onto the bend in her arm.
Tonight we plung
let them find us
eyes locked up into eyes.For the hundredth time
I honestly don’t remember
her poisonous mouth with mine
we sing our favorite song.
Together, Romeo and Juliette
inch up super close
there’s something about tonight
clever words come cascading down
spoken all dramatically and
we laugh the nervousness away.
We start all over,
more lipstick please,
we’re being all serious.
Practice kissing me, she begs,
take your poison pill
bring your lips to mine.
Unsure if this plan will work
I kiss her dramatically hard,
almost as if,
this is it
tonight we’ll die
arm in arm. -
There is no more room
for birthday cards from you.
Deny truth to be a liar
there was never enough room
for good words on paper.
I’m not sure why
I needed to be told today
about these skipped over years,
years that have been kind.
Time has been kept quiet,
dutifully, as if
sharing a birthday card and letter
was my wish at all.
The hurt in you
is a wide open chasm
a beautiful book to read
during these long summer evenings.
If I had taken the time
to actually write a birthday card
I’d say something like,
…I wish you and yours the best.
With an outstretched hand
void of love
or those sentimental drawings.
I wonder if,
you have any idea
just how misguided
your denial to them
actually was,
while being totally truthful
with me. -
It seems so serious
this need you hold for me.
To get inside and knock me back
a dramatic life threatening fever,
the loss of taste
my goodness my skin is oh so flush.
Without excess energy
I suddenly find myself
in a hurry to cover up.
Breathless almost out of breath
the number of infected
keeps getting worse,
I wonder if,
you have this affect
on everyone you’ve ever met?
I agree to quarantine,
and take you seriously
I’ll help bend the spread.
I don’t want to be
the one left here
lost in the aftermath.
So a mask is the request,
by those who protect
the ones completely overwhelmed.
I hope you don’t mind,
if I stay inside,
I’ll avoid co-mingling with you.
I’ll keep my distance
6 feet to myself
because I don’t
want to infect you. -
The God’s very forcefully asked
show us love through your eyes.
Reluctantly, the camera she grabbed,
so unsure at the beginning,
just a bit of encouragement
the frames she photographed
instantly came to life.
Something as simple as,
a dramatic milk bath
the girl wrapped in red
beauty played with light and contrast
there in her luxurious bath.
A sheer sweater, very lightly draped
across her upturned breasts,
eyes are drawn into eyes, I swear.
Looking deeply into her lens,
each new series tells the story.
Juliette desperately on her bed,
a rusted pickup in the desert,
a brand new picture, a photograph.
The girl with her heavenly eye
seductively exploiting the scenery.
I can’t believe my eyes,
each time I get to sneak a peek
I see a little piece of her
in every pictured piece. -
From the start of the season
the rains came heavily down
rain has long been predicted,
the monsoons of love.
A torrential flooding tonight
with our path being eaten up,
we climbed to higher ground
and up there for the first real time
I saw this pretty look.
In a flash,
the sky had really opened up
a biblical downpour for sure
hands were spread like palms
catching all the laughter.
The midnight air we kissed
our shoulders they were soaked,
we tried to huddle under cover
every touch felt new and,
the crawling water kept advancing.
Places where we once walked
disappeared under a torrent,
dangerous now, we waited for lights
not wanting to leave
tonight was our one real chance
to float away arm in arm
and disappear
without a clue or trace. -
A quickening pulse
I am rendered helpless here,
for she is my strongest hour.
Always my first thought
she insists I help her count
in the middle of the night
propped up on elbows
talking nonsense.
My kind of love
stretches across the decades
my words come in equal measure
whispered or forcefully choked
I beg the truth from you.
Down on all fours
I’m properly waiting
my turn is exclusively yours.
A glancing blow finds its mark
I’m surprised by her strength
my shoulders take on her weight,
by another strong smack of hers
affection sun-kissed or otherwise
the redness accompanies my look.
Instructed not to move,
I can’t help but flinch,
still playful while in her mood.
I’ve always been way too sensitive
with certain kinds of words
my arduous task here
is to obediently listen,
and act as if,
I want all this to stop.
Her eager want is attractive
that deep belly want
I’m drawn to just her.
To be flipped over and taken
she inches up super close
whispers those instructions.
Heavy love-making
my little charmer
is now buried up underneath,
and the tip of her chin
digs squarely in
satisfying the ache I have for her.
Lastly, she turns
half out of breath herself,
she throws a towel with instructions
“clean up, yourself.” -
In this, the one and precious hour
there seems to be this one
who thrives on a glorious drug
the want and need of attention.
There is nothing more divine
than to have everyone at your side
thinking that this is the precious hour,
the blessed final one.
I beg to beg differently,
calling out this selfish need and want.
A blinding defenseless light
shines in all our eyes
so when one begs for our attention
we are too blind to question why.
So even on this day,
when good news was afoot,
everything crumbled,
such news wasn’t about suffering or
a more serious time limit.
The news the rest of us would want
meant our attention
would sorely be missed.
Make no mistake,
these words may make little sense,
but on a day when the mass
had its density and size shrink
shouldn’t we have celebrated?
Devastated instead,
because a procedure was canceled
the answers from such a prick
meant she’ll have to wait for answers,
but we’ll line up like we always do
and pour our attention
so desperately out. -
Time and attention she swore,
she always swears when serious.
She wants nothing more
than a perfect relationship.
A union where,
one is simply allowed to please,
the other has firm control.
Her gift is to be the pleaser,
it’s a rush and the biggest thrill
of course, she swears
both have to agree to conform.
She’s mostly misunderstood,
unless you’re the fortunate one
to be the one who waited.
She loves being called the “girl.”
On a day when words are so sensitive,
being equal isn’t always better,
she swears she can’t or won’t conform.
Both sides have their positive roles
she’ll bend for the proper hand.
Her way goes against the norm,
the joy of being submissive
after all, she begged for the lessons
she’s absolutely drawn to thought
to the intellectual hammer
soft and sensitive enlightenment.
These things were in her all along
her absolutely beautiful thorn
quietly hidden behind the back,
she was asked to hand over her palm
she reluctantly exposed a fist.
Slowly and over time
her thorn is her greatest strength now,
polished and perfectly balanced
time and attention she swore. -
What matters most,
during this,
her praying hours
are her pretty looks.
Tonight she must decide,
exactly who,
gets all her attention now.
Her choices are somewhat blind,
still, she can see perfectly fine.
She swears to be kind
giving while trying to please
as sensitive strangers surround her now.
The girl twists her long hair
nervously, she tries to laugh.
I swear I love her the most.
Tonight she’s in a mood
saying something about
the way we interfere in her life
she’d probably be better off
if we up and left her alone. -
We love our sons
when they stumble awkwardly,
our sons who look up to us
wanting our unconditional love.
Sons depend on their fathers
even when that father is single
working two jobs to keep up.
A father who may also be his mom.
We love our sons,
so they can give fully of themselves,
to be compassionate and the caring ones.
We love our sons
not for their merits or awards,
but simply because if they fall,
they know to get up again.
Share with them your own missteps,
let them know the vulnerabilities
the things you’ve overcome.
We love our sons
because each new day is a gift.
Our sons need to hear the words
“We love them.”
Lastly,
we love our sons
truthful and unconditionally.Happy Father’s Day Everyone
-
Time and attention collide
from the filthy streets
an innocent man was murdered.
Still, police on horseback
those poor horses
thrust into our violence.
Under the weight of a curfew
we’ve got minutes to decide
if we’ll pull up with our white peers.
There on the edge,
words are smashed in our faces
windows exploded on tv
the ratings are getting higher.
So we decide to join the protest.
That black man shouldn’t of died
we needed to be outside
twisting our way inside
underneath all the glassless windows.
The smell of burning wood and tear gas
we tried to protect our eyes
it was no use really
we didn’t have one of those fancy masks
that all the police are using.
We watched our televisions explode,
the violence was real,
we were taking as much as one could grab
no one dare stop us from looting.
Keep your eyes down,
we kept silent
there’s nothing like free stealing
the frantic chaos
was almost out of control.
Everyone in our neighborhood
out taking advantage
the moment that black man was murdered.
The hour is late, no one cares
we’ve been instructed to stay inside
the riots on tv have just started
let’s sit with some popcorn
watch the world unravel.
The tense tension can’t be described,
the loose hour on this night
is unlike at any time before.
Our attention is torn and drawn
we can’t help but stare at our phones
friends are begging us
to come join them protest
with a wink and a nod. -
To tell the truth
we ask if anyone cares,
they won’t begin to answer.
There’s always someone out there
that one true giver
begging to be the one
who is forever chosen
to out perform all the rest.
Would you sit even closer
if I had been the one to ask
I nudge her closer
pulling her into my arms.
There in each other’s stare
the moon and clouds
twist in their nightly ritual
all we can do is watch.
The cameras try and focus
we’re stingy with the light
hungry hands prefer the dark.
Feeding from the girl
she starts to whisper
fame and fortune
coming from her heavy mouth
she gives me the key and code
to her everything
and instructs,
” do what you will.” -
Against a wall
we are burdened in heavy thoughts.
Still, one of us
has to be reminded how to love.
Yesterday when we sat atop the news
we spent hours trying to talk,
quietly, the words never came
we inspected the images in silence.
Today we face the news
we stare at our beloved everlasting
nothing we decide makes any sense
we’ll simply steer directly into the wall.
Failure weighs in all of us,
yes, we’re all to blame
for we’ve forgotten sorrow’s sharp blade.
Memories can cut deeply,
they should be locked up
and stored safely away
I already miss her,
today we add another layer
another cut to the wound
on top of a scar that all this while
never had a proper chance to heal.
Perhaps tomorrow
we will time travel
and act like none of this was real.
Pick a new time and start over
and simply choose
who we want to tell. -
There are words,
and then there are other words.
Time is about to break again
time will go against time
and not be my friend.
I’ll find myself on the other side,
hiccup crying or otherwise
lost somewhere in my throat
choking on a devastated memory.
This ugliness has shown its face before.
I am not ready for hurt to injure,
nor console my broken emptiness
there are words
and there are other words.
This is a love of devotion
born in the moment
the simple act of seeing someone.
The excitement and thrill
causing the heart to quicken
blood enriches the body
a pure and ecstatic joy
this is that kind of love.
Unquestionable without waiver
there is this constant longing
that never leaves or says goodbye.
There are words,
and there are other words.
This pure trust is our strongest guide,
always making sure we protect
to fiercely guard with our lives.
We pour ourselves fully
we know only how to give completely,
and when we are empty
by our truest nature
we draw on that love
that fills our insides.
Today, when time
goes against time
I’ll clutch and hold on to
a memory. -
The beauty code erupted inside
a locking sequence had engaged
she swore she’d never feel this way
there on the edge brokenness
she wasn’t so beautiful then
keeping her toes face forward
whatever was inside
would most likely pass.
Everything else always did.
She briefly looked into a mirror,
still as pretty as ever,
just not on the inside
the others had left their marks.
I don’t want to ask
what’s coming next,
she often repeated to herself.
Today she’ll ask,
for this person to take a step back,
otherwise she’ll have no other choice,
but to go all silent again.
Our perfect ghost
in isolation now
takes nothing for chance or granted.
So today when she awoke
with a million questions
oh how could this have happened?
Someone had gotten under her defenses.
Now against a thousand blinks and sighs
Juliana inched up to her window
and with a half guarded smile,
she mouthed,
Roman go away!
If my brothers find you,
they will kill you!
The fool looked into her eyes
and said his most famous phrase,
Doubt the stars are fire
Doubt the sun doth move
Doubt truth to be a liar
Never doubt thy love.
Oh you are a fool
Hurry, I can see them!
Go!
Juliana ordered back into her room
there was a plagued virus outside
which meant everyone
was in self-quarantine.
She mouthed,
I’ll doubt everything,
I’ll doubt love is a lie.
Take back your sun and stars
it won’t work this time. -
Time and attention beliefs,
she asks, can you follow all of my commands?
He stumbles forward into place,
she undoes that one specific clasp,
she asks, do I need to remind you
always keep up with the duty at hand.
She quickly jerked him in place,
now on all fours,
she squared her 2 point stance
instructing him to the mark.
Just as quick as all this started
she asks, do you want to continue?
Of course.
That probably wasn’t necessary
a simple nod would of sufficed.
New mistakes are bound to happen,
however new, she still wanted this one
to be stripped of all masculine trace.
Squatting between her highest heels
she reminds him of his place
words don’t come from pets,
she put his nose in his puddled mistake.
Punishing the newness out of him.
Joy in this exotic place
he tested with a passing glance
there in her rich melodic room
she tensed at his intrusion.
She snapped his focus into place
correcting with a stiffened leash.
Her curt and tightly pierced words
keep me from your sight
she asks, is this understood? -
There on top of a treasure
sat my most prized possession.
I can catch myself
staring into trouble,
the girl and her charms
demand my time and attention
are exclusively hers.
She’s free to push whatever button,
as long as she agrees, to care.
Not carry my temperamental mood
neatly in her side pocket.
We work on syllables, remember
that tone and focus
we play with certain words,
and by that I mean,
we all have our triggers.
Trained and taught how
to release that toe curling wave
while on her saddle,
but only if,
the words have been
properly worked on of course.
So exactly where have my words been?
Today she put her foot down
demanded I get back to this,
the puzzle pictures,
where she’s handsomely predicted.
Oh what have I created?
I can only whisper
today started with beauty
way up high
all excited and in a mood,
so here I am
writing of course.
-
Working on and against the minutes
she battles to stay afloat
wanting to lay down like yesterday
long before there were little ones.
She finds herself too tired again
she’s waited throughout the day
trying to keep herself busy
and in her own way
where she’s free to roam
half dressed or otherwise.
Most days it’s a celebration, but
her impossible reality,
it’s getting harder and harder to live in.
She tries to settle and
wrap her mind around the news
she’s probably not
getting through this one.
Still, she has her little triumphs
she looks at the clock
time is outstretched and wanting
waiting on the very last piece of her
she tries to lay down and collapse,
but her eyes stay awake.
She can’t help but reread these words
the divine hasn’t changed,
I can only see her through these eyes
half dressed or otherwise,
she’s still this amazing woman
I can see her curled on her side
fighting sleep to decipher words.
It’s alwsys my hope
She closes her phone with a smile
these are our greatest moments,
the ones no one sees.
We can easily find ourselves
in and out of every excuse
she’ll eventually ask for help
in her very stubborn way.
After all, she’s the one
with an anxious tepid mood
pressuring us to never take any chances.
The blood rushes back
it’s always exciting
to wake and see her here
nothing is ever the same or routine.
Now that tonight is warm again
she pushes her way inside
trying to quietly rest,
even if it means climbing in a pocket.
Settling on the tiniest pillow
she places her warm palms in his
he’s careful not to squeeze too tightly
she’s a precious flower now,
too delicate,
to simply go to bed. -
Awake and wanting answers
many have asked before
and from this moment forward
no one needs to question
don’t worry about paying love forward
after all this time together.
I have had the cure all this time.
Learn to simply trust
offer some different side of yourself
very early on we lean on each other
every moment of every day.
Yell from the tops of steps
out of respect we won’t hold hands
understand we care what others think.
Most have forgotten how to give
after everything the opposite is true
return to the days of yesterday
rewind the ache inside
yell again from rooftops.
My one and forever only
everyday seems to start the same. -
Interwoven tightly spun fabric
hangs loosely on the edges
papers that support us
are strewn all over the place
like we don’t care anymore.
We were so careful then
pretending we had this perfect place.
I couldn’t help but miss her,
got in the way
and of course there was this
agreeable aggression
pinning our shoulders down
against the sex tonight.
Attention showers down
the curves and the hours it takes
to perfect those perfect muscles.
The sun has passed
no more jealous eyes
pointing out our mistakes
the equity we reinvest
a new swing and pillow
to heighten our love-making.
The edges come even stronger now.
The girl and her skin routine,
hurry please, there are no
interruptions for this.
The workout is always the same
she hangs from around my neck
we swear in full darkness
because we only need the light
coming from
a single candle
to perform what we need to do.
Buried in our room
under a weeks worth of clothes
that lay strewn about
adding to our chaotic mood.
Shadows fight to form together
her body sways
she’s up in the music
eyes a thousand miles away.
Hurry please, time is almost up.
The jealous sky with no patience
is on the verge
of making this dramatic sun-rise,
she rolls her eyes,
annoyed by the morning sky
accompanied by these birds
showing off singing this
fucked up melody.
For now though,
the sky is unavailable
she’s busy on all fours
counting the minutes
hurry please.
Hurry.
Please. -
From the start of something
there are beautiful ones
that would gladly let Troy burn.
Having had just one,
it was impossible to convince her
to see how life was
from on the other side
with the rest of us.
The best advice if you’re with one
you had better accept her
for how she is or was.
Accept her for her
because she cannot change
it’s that quality that make men
build Trojan horses
thinking they can save her.
She sees nothing wrong with
letting Troy burn again,
there’s nothing wrong with
conquering a world where
change scares everyone,
but her.
-
With everyday lining up
unlike all the rest
I warned there would be limits.
Tomorrow I’ll take her
to a private sandy place,
an ancient dune perhaps
where I’ll read to her
from my favorite book.
I can already anticipate
her excitement
from underneath a blanket,
she’ll remove her top,
she loves watching my eyes light up.
With faith on her side
the power to control me
I’ll read her things from my diary,
my solitary hateful things,
nervous that love
will one day take over
seriously, without this girl
I would have a half filled life
void of certain memories
triggered by her perfumed scent.
My hands disappear
under the blankets
her nakedness grows,
she expects I lay perfectly still
to continue reading my words
no matter the distraction.
Fully engulfed,
my boy-like cheeks burn
back at grade school thinking of
the naughty things
in the back of the church
she touched back then.
Still, the weather grows
it’s cold and her shoulders are exposed
the other people on the trail
can see her upturned ample chin
staring directly down at me.
I push and smother all of her
careful to uncover her breasts
a scooped up handful
the sand is squeezed between our toes,
she laughs at my nervousness.
Her liberating smile engulfs us both,
the sun so high over head
I take hold of her hips
she presses downward as if,
she wants her saddle ride again.
Her hair falls loosely
those accidental curls
across her delicate shoulders
and I can’t help but,
kiss her squarely on her full mouth.
That kiss has to be perfectly placed
firm but very softly though
I pull back to suggest
we’re going to take our time
this time, unlike all the rest
we blow through the mood.
I try and convince her
these moments can be fleeting
there could come a day
where I’d be reciting these episodes
strictly from memory
she’d be in the arms
of someone all together different.
She laughs and tells me
to keep reading. -
Counting backwards
keeping to the numbers
we promised we’d memorize.
Protected and guarded
she nudges to be by my side
I secretly grab ahold of her
and tug her into position
long before peering eyes ever notice.
The summer heat is the change
that is almost upon us,
she is a reminder of myself
of how I used to be
looking straight ahead and forward
in love with the sunsets.
Closed mouth, paying close attention,
I’m memorizing her favorite words
she knows how to melt sugar
with her backwards glance.
She’s drawn to the intellectual
her walls are closed and encircled.
I’ve begged for centuries,
just give me the last combination
I have been waiting here
just to defend her
with every part of my being.
Eyes look up into eyes
she can’t remember
the last time that’s happened.
Her wanting aches
just don’t remind her of love, please.
The truth is at her grounded core
you get only one chance
to try and impress her
it was a lifetime ago
when the forever and ever after
truly ever mattered.
She wants this new plan
not to be flawed,
she crawls and asks for attention
to come lay and teach her the lessons.
All innocent and demure
she’s a true powerhouse
her eyes aren’t the same as the rest
they remind me of yesterday
when breaking was a laughable joke.
The future is about today though,
she has reached out
like nothing has ever changed,
just the same now,
I’ll make sure
to answer all her questions
her wrists bound in leather
tied properly of course
her pulse quickens
she asks,
“Sir, when are my lessons?” -
The beautiful edges
keep the heartache
from eroding away
what’s playing in my head,
what’s playing inside again.
Yesterday was
perfect for you because
your arms were wide open.
Thoughtful songs
sung well into the night
love seems to never give up
love never gets old
even as people complain
at this late night hour
shut up, keep it down.
They’ve never seen this before
so blind and out of focus
each day the ache starts anew
mirrors try hard to reflect
exactly what it is I feel,
when I felt.
I don’t expect them to remember or
shine quite how they used to when
we’d wake early hoping
for that blessed moment
where I’d see you stealing
a tiny glance
out the window
where we used to watch the rain
fall
for a thousand hours
on most days
we laid here
deep in the belly of each others arms.
You have a way digging
burrowing in to my skin
I have missed out
on all the hours
frozen minutes sit in puddles now.
The afternoon storms have moved on
the ground sits soaked.
Everyone everywhere is soaking
my coverup, I don’t need to mention
why my edges are well enough alone,
tonight the sky softly spins
I can’t wait for the rain
it’ll take a thousand hours
to come and wash away
this tepid ache
I hold for you. -
The smallest target
through a keyhole
I can just barely see her
it’s all I get
her distorted figure
undressing in the moment.
It’s impossible really
to act like I love her,
she can see straight through me
and my squinted looks.
I can’t help but
disapprove of the girl,
who has always had this way with me.
Still, I pretend to listen
it’s the only way
I can filter my intentions.
Stronger, still I grow this way
she’s threatening to die alone
wanting to get my attention
begging me to beg
so I left her voice message alone
I’ll listen to her later
once the night has all but settled.
My 3am girl,
I’ll call her instead,
she’s never too tired
to pick up
right where we left off.
I’ll let her
take control
taking my pulse from behind.
She squeezes into the smallest spaces
I can’t help but stare
locked looking squarely down.
My 3am girl
has the perfect
I can’t say the word
that other word
for a feline. -
There is thirst this hour
and I’m already craving her
everyday there is this challenge
to leave things in a way,
that suggest,
we were never really here
in the first place.
Falling down
on broken knees to palms
I wouldn’t mind
if she were down
on all fours
always trying to look up
asking how she can help.
Having been left
already passed by
there’s something better
knocking at my door.
That someone else
has been here for years
trying to slip in
wanting to give what I deserve
keep your head up
you deserve more of this
flooded attention of hers.
Don’t mention it love
equal assets are shared equally
she brings that softness
almost too close.
The curves touch and tease
with heavily buried kisses,
forgive almost as if,
this was her first time
she was sharing.
This is the moment
that keeps the trigger focused
and just asI turn to breathe
she grabs and takes hold
I’m her blind witness
swearing to do exactly
as she’s instructed. -
A twisted thought of hers
just let the softness come in
let the skin to skin properties
bury the feelings we try and hide.
From the start
she walked in a way
that meant something else,
a heavy pulse breathing
finding it hard to swallow
the girl I’m sure meant well
if only she knew
what it meant to use up all the breathing space.
It’s getting hard
trying to push her
out of working memory
like some tidal wave
she has completely enveloped my world.
Under the bend of water
looking up at an upside down wave
it’s impossible to know exactly where
I stand with her.
For now, I wait for the night
she seems to come around
when there are shadows to help her hide.
There’s nothing special about most things,
that’s true until, she walks in
I can’t help but give notice.
Captive and bound by this torture device
my eyes betray my weakness,
she sees this struggle in me,
I hate having her read me
so completely from day to day.
I swear there’s nothing more perfect
than the grip this girl has
first convincing me to lay down
so she can place a hand
to keep me from
screaming for help. -
The morning hook
reaching in and underneath
she slips to her favorite position,
her soft shell is strong enough
to hold both of them.
This position of theirs
has been working for centuries.
She holds tightly to the sides
interwoven and locked
this is their first time
and her generous want is overflowing.
tiny twisted touching,
just as the sky is still so moody
she spreads her hands open
last night and that boisterous thunder
she mouths the command,
“Let me in.”
Barely above a whisper now
her hungry mouth wants to feed
that undeniable softness
she squeezes the life awake
her full attention controls them.
The skies naturally open up
gentle rain rhythms come in waves
at times a rough downpour,
followed by fingertips tracing
slowly pressing her mood downward
the edge is at their feet now.
With one good thrust
she pushes them up and off
Love floating
Love with no gravity
Love that curl the toes.
They land in heap
heavy out of breath,
there in the center
of their morning bed,
she gets dressed
and promises to be back at noon. -
Even if I were the one
diagnosed with something epic,
instead of a girl in Hawaii
I guess I’d still ask
if you wanted to write to me
for however long
it took me to rearrange my life.
Today I guess I’m ready
to listen to your diagnosis
I’ll probably stop you
50 times or more.
I’m telling you now
I’m not going to take the news
with the grace and dignity
you want to hear.
I’m going to lash out with anger
how could you?
It’s not going to be all pretty
still, technically
Im processing.
Our one and only rule
that no crying thing
still stands, because I can’t today
break into a bunch of little pieces.
Maybe it’s therapeutic
we talk about the diagnosis
the treatment plan
the drugs you’ll take
and then be alone inside your head.
For the past year and a half
you’ve made it
to witness a virus
that changes the tables
and puts us
in your position.
We cover our faces in public
afraid of the dreaded germs
if we get this
and you survive
I’m smiling!
The beauty in life
we never know
when change is going to happen.
I think it’s time
you take up the mantle
help us get through this quarantine
putting everything back to normal
maybe tomorrow
we could talk about that diagnosis. -
There are very few
that are as colorful as you, sure,
we could try and scrub it off
it’s no use really
we’d only make your skin raw.
Yesterday when we were quarantined
we laid in the tub, celebrating,
our entangled body parts
were a site to enjoy.
It was easy enough though
to naturally love on you this way,
I’m the only one
allowed to see you naked, truthfully,
I can’t stop staring
fuck, the hours it must take.
Flawed curves and all
pull and draw me down
under the surface
where this part of me
is as equally exposed.
Each time I write
trying to make this set of words,
just as pretty,
as the ones I’ve left behind.
You’re the beauty star afterall
with all the admirers
I’m here to simply
write it all down.
Midnight and its darkness
trying to catch me,
as I stare at you.
It’s no use really because
there are too many mirrors,
so that every time I look
I’m caught by you.
That sideways stare,
I’d concede
she’s the only one
I would want to jump and fall on,
sure you’re special too,
just keep in mind
I’d make a mess of you
depending on
how we’d land. -
Over there in the rain
the girl was pinned
properly of course,
against coarse fence boards
being kissed hard like this,
as if, this was her one and only chance.
Temptation poured down over them
against a late night hour
before the end of a shift.
Headlights never mattered
they were blind to the outside world
love’s broken grasp begs
for a shooting star to save them.
A wish wished and handed over
this was their first time
to be held captive in time.
This quarantine blocks them now
each of them remember differently,
they can’t clear their minds,
oh but love has moved on
they’re tired of being tortured.
One of them came up with a plan
to escape their confines
and kiss again against the tough boards.
The want in the girl
has been unbearable
for weeks now
ever since she was told
to stay six feet away from everyone.
Touch taken for granted
down on all the other wet days
tonight it’s scheduled to rain
she’ll stare out the window at a fence
pretending her lover
will meet her there
pinning her shoulders
properly of course
so they can kiss
in the rain again. -
To the girl
who cannot sleep
make no mistake
you’ve always been here,
always awake,
trying to finish one day
before a new one starts.
Some say,
there is one sure fire way
to dance in that slumbered state,
but I wonder if the girl
who has so much to say
would listen to her neon lights?
In the dead of night,
as she lay near 3am
her eyes are so wide awake
they have betrayed her again.
She’s always thinking.
She’s always ready to start.
There is this something
buried deeply
inside the brilliant girl.
She can’t wait to search
her eyes are wide open
there’s just enough light
to keep her mind busy
she circles over and over
until the hour is late.
Everyone else has recharged
while her battery waits.
We know things tumble
good days are mixed with the rest.
If only her eyes
would naturally fall silent
she would be happy and content, right?
On most days,
it’s fine if she doesn’t rest
only some would have noticed
she’s getting good at hiding.
Still, there is one true fire way
to join the others she envies,
just imagine putting the anxiety
truly to rest.
To finally lay satisfied
in the quietness
in ones own head. -
I walk on this tightrope
a wire stretched dangerously thin
at any second it could break.
I understand that’s why
there are so many onlookers
it’s easier to sell tragedy
there’s more to show
just keep a clean distance apart.
Our new world
changed us overnight
I brought my mouth
up to his
and he kissed me fully,
almost as if,
he knew my weaknesses.
There on the edge
I’m drawn to the twisted
the ones who need
instead of want.
Down on all fours
crawling in an already swept floor
I look at her,
she admonishes me
for not paying attention
to him.
I ask and he forgives
there is this absolute silence
and yet, the music is so loud
I can’t quite hear what he said.
Waiting for my turn arise
those in front of me
quietly move to him
it’s finally my turn
to lift my chin
take him in my mouth.
I repeat this thing in my head
I obey and follow the rules
kneeling on a cushioned floor
I take my time with him.
She tugs at my arm
are ready to go?
I stand,
to look him in the eyes,
thank him,
and then leave the church. -
The bluest wings
her eyes sparkle and shine
maybe I’ve always belonged here
after all
I am the first one
to lay lyric after lyric
deep in the belly of her arms.
She’s addicted
to the godforsaken words
written in her favorite books.
I try and keep up
taking notice
of where her eyes turn.
I’m so into her
there is no excuse, I’m blind
and have been this way
since birth.
I only want tiny things
next to the girl who forgets
she can’t quite remember why
today is all I have with her.
I serve her as if,
she were the one and only Queen
like the mold was
crushed and melted.
Still, there’s been no one
since her.
When she sat right there
high up on her throne
she was all mine.
Love balances and plays
she swears she’s never sworn before
I can’t help but think that
she’s lying and
I can’t tell the difference.
Perhaps my words
aren’t mine anymore,
they belong to all of you,
but most of all,
they’re dripping of her.
I wanted to write of blue wings
but the girl ended up
getting tangled in the net
I’m not sure
who’s the fragile bird anymore?
She takes up a good amount space
and just as equally,
she complains when I don’t write.
Something about the puzzle
I keep tucked and hidden inside
so the world won’t judge too harshly.
Yesterday didn’t happen because
there’s something wrong in her,
she’s fragile,
it couldn’t be any other way
I want her this way.
Love was an accidental overdose,
she didn’t mean,
to load that much of the drug
square into my veins.
All I can remember
was staring in her eyes
and repeating the same thing
over and over
those were the bluest wings
I’d ever seen. -
It started out
at 9am
head over heels
in love with her.
I couldn’t control it then
just a pretty smell
her perfumed scent
I devoured her beauty
it was just enough
to send me
head over heels in love with her,
sadly though,
by noon I forgot to look
she wasn’t stopping by
my window.
I was falling out of love with her
by that afternoon
I was eating lunch alone
having no one but
myself to blame
So that by 5pm
I was truly on my own again.
Love in a day
I still want to be with her
it all goes away
so quickly without her.
I will not have to look
around the corner
beauty does not exist
it’s time for bed
still each night,
at this hour,
I whisper her name
hoping she’ll meet me again
at 9am. -
Taste the change with me,
call me Daddy,
if you like
being treated like a baby girl.
If that’s something
you want to feel
swear alongside me
we can look at the television
and dream of other people
making fun of their vanilla houses.
Come home and undress
put on your tightest fitting leather
I’ll grab the whip and leash
we can pretend
all night if you want
we’re from other places
forcefully kissing lips
hands to each others throats
squeeze the life out of me
I’m completely yours already.
My handsome lover,
beautiful in just a bra and panties
turn and hand over that pillow
loving on you
face to face
being physical at a price
ask permission
ask to beg
with just your eyes.
Like this Daddy?
Lift up your hips
to embrace the thrust
squeeze the pleasure.
Making love
with my lover
over the phone
words can be sloppy
grammar cues don’t matter
not when we’re in this place
you arch and turn
to look into the face
of the one
you secretly love. -
Did you see the look
that crept into their eyes
it’s no use now to hide
they’re completely blind.
I want someone
to come take my hand
and show me how to love
before I catch some deadly virus
and become a burden
that no one wants to touch.
Today I am handsome
otherwise I wouldn’t break the ban
keeping six feet away
I am tortured to know
you’re as close
as an outstretched hand.
How were we supposed to know
one day we’d wake up
and be told
we can’t kiss anymore.
Maybe or perhaps
we could stay all locked up
in your room
like we used to
when we could freely
come and go.
Love is on its way
I was told
the sickness
isn’t all that deadly
I’d take a chance
if you’re ready. -
There is this side
drawn up inside
deep in the belly in all of us.
Who amongst us
can truly choose or decide
just hot much love
they’re willing to divide?
Can we separate ourselves
from our-selves?
This might be a play on words
you can decide for yourself,
but first, you must trust
that the voice inside yourself,
that one that is mostly ignored,
is allowed to be itself, unrehearsed.
Can you truly stop your mind
from constantly thinking
about that thirst
in that first kiss?
Always remember there is but one,
that soul searcher
who touched something inside us.
This feeling can happen just once,
and only once because,
there’s never enough love
to go around in this life.
Yes, we may convince ourselves
that this other has replaced the one,
but it’s no use really
see we are pre-programmed
and have been
since birth.
So when you love
make sure
they are capable
to love in return. -
The romance in chasing
my one and only
real true love,
even as sick as that must sound
I can’t help but notice
the eyes of certain strangers
draw me in, but it’s no use really
I can’t stay with them
when I’m this infected.
I swear I’ll keep on writing
no matter how long
you keep ignoring me.
From that first moment
when I touched
that sacred little place of yours
and set your head spinning
it’s easy to see why
you can never change your plans.
Close your eyes,
just this once,
alongside mine
so that together,
we can remember
our childhood homes.
Oh how different we were raised,
if only they could see us now
what a laugh.
The ones who said
we’d never last
even though right now
you’re not talking to me,
maybe someday,
you’ll come around
to your guarded senses
so that we can finish
what we started
before some random virus
had us isolated
in the wrong arms
of another again. -
You promised
and said
I never would
have to worry love,
yet here I am
playing with
temptation.
I wish I could
just start over,
it’s just,
I never would
because
I am in love
with just you.
My one
and only one
has me
thinking again
I never would
be left here again.
I can only think of
how it was
when you promised
you’d never leave
me.
I’m here because
I’m cold
in a tub
thinking of
another time
when we clearly
made love.
Love that was
drawn out
because
in your eyes,
we were
a pretty match.
Sure we are
a little blind,
I mean
I promised you
after all,
I would give
all my words
on a flash drive.
They’re ready
whenever it is
you ask me
to stop writing
all my words
down for you.
All I ask
don’t quarantine
all my words
before we can
make love
once again.
Clearly love,
I can go on
like this
for centuries
while I’m
waiting on
you
to catch up
to me. -
The girl is alive
I can’t help but
promise to lay still
underneath her
hypnotic spell.
She puts her tiny hands
half over my eyes,
and still,
the light dissapears.
There’s no chance in returning
to the defeated,
perhaps I’ve been claimed.
Taken by her
cruel kind of love,
still, she asks
I stand perfectly still.
I move an inch
and stare
into her glorious eyes.
She smiles and slaps me hard,
“I told you not to move.”
I guess I don’t mind
playing
under this particular one.
She’s so different,
from the ones who simply gave.
There’s no free love
she and her spirited charms
I have to guard my thoughts.
She claws to get my attention
whispering the very words
she swore she’d avoid.
I’m drawn to her
innocent darkness
that others won’t beleive
is there.
What a freshness
her perfume electrifies the room,
and by instinct
I offer up my arm.
She twists the tourniquet
almost too hard
and then makes me wait.
She slowly needles in her love.
“That’s enough,” she spits,
“it’s better to have you starving.”
She’s beautiful
and I’m in love.
I can’t complain
about all the time
she spends in front of the mirror
after all, she reminds me
she’s wearing feather cuffs
for the pleasure
she’s about to unleash. -
Life has a story all its own
and in all honesty
there’s no room to complain
especially when we see
the others struggling.
Too deep to reach the bottom
it’s the bluest water
one has ever seen.
I wonder if life
has a remedy cleanser
next week
we’ve all been warned
a treacherous virus
has been unleashed
on an already anxious world.
Desperate to remember
a time when we actually played
watching lights overhead
while music just played.
Store shelves are worn
it was just easier when
we thought
we conquered the world.
Next week
the numbers are expected to grow
exponentially, the fear increases
I have a favor to ask
please wash your hands
bury yourself inside
stay away
promise you’ll be safe
on the other side. -
Connect the electrical cord
to the base of my wrists
you could flip the switch
whenever you wanted to
give me the shock of my life.
I prefer to wear Tom Ford
me and my manageable look
I’ve been chasing for years now.
There’s always someone
chasing right along side me
I could never have imagined
the devotion of strangers
faithfully following my words.
I want you all to know
I’m faithful to yours too.
Our lives twist and tangle
there are some of you
I wish I knew better
because the devotion you share
has meant the world to me.
You’re my one true inspiration now,
here where the darkness plays
it never mattered to me before
writing, before falling asleep alone.
I would hate for you
to think I weren’t grateful
giving me your undivided attention,
there’s something about capturing
that keeps me counting on you.
I come with all the love I can gather
trust me when I say
I’m stronger because of you.
-
There on the bathroom floor
one can clearly count
the hours spent
heaped up in piles.
Obviously, she loves
more than most,
even if,
she’s always in a hurry
to run and disappear.
I’m not sure her love
that’s so strewn about
will ever be enough,
but I guess I remind her
of every time
she’s truly ever felt alive.
Like last night,
her epic return
she and her softness
hard to describe or discern
just how securely
she’s buried firmly
under my dutiful skin.
I’m infected I suppose
sure to show symptoms
any day now.
I’ll be going down.
We just had to stay up late
and catch up
on all the lost time.
This time though,
she calls me lover
and out of duty
I promptly answer
“yes baby. ”
She heard the counting
my wanting hours
struggling here within me
and oh how I begged
while dragging my thoughts
to a dark place.
The beauty in our tragic romance
my beloved and her looks,
she begs,
she knows how to use
the trigger words
on me.
This should mean
I shouldn’t kiss and bite
her exposed shoulders
she’s a woman after all
who is technically
my one and only
true love. -
The repeating has
begun again.
What started out
as some vacant whisper
has managed to
force its way
back into my mind.
No one has me
so trapped inside
I gently say your name
just before bed.
I close my eyes
get all shut down
lying perfectly still
and start to remember
just how you felt.
You’re my beautiful one,
the only one
with a firm grasp
here around my throat.
You hold a perfect lens
I can’t wait to see
when I go to sleep
and whisper your name.
Maybe it’s just
these seasonal changes
that are crowding my mind.
I know it’s love,
a sickness really
I can’t quite rid myself of
shame on you
for putting you
here in my mind. -
The temple steps
she’s my one and only
the sun is at its highest
so excited to spend time with her
we are wearing all white
everything was revealed
bronzed and honied shoulders glisten
the hours we spent outside.
Kneeling in prayer now
we love in equal measure
as if,
doubt sometimes creeps in
someone were actually listening
the focus is on her.
Love and that attention
it’s a drug to be close to her
coming from you
she has to instigate the connection
I’ve come to adore.
Wanting all parts of her
here on broken knees to palms
there are flaws in everything
I repeat my words
the poetry is just a part of us
my armed weapons
how I see the world
spread out on full display
I want to be free to do whatever.
The well traveled temple floor
there are many years between us
gone is the story it told
that unsure newness
with its mosaic pattern
she talks in rhythm
long since faded away
time could be running out.
The holes in the roof
we aren’t all that picky
exposed by an afternoon rain,
there’s something about nature
still, we quietly gather
our spooning position
others join
talking late into the night.
Let the cleansing start
where we jump and enter each other
a sweet melody begins
bodies working together
everything is in rhythm
that moment when we release
we stay frozen in that position. -
Inked stories on both her arms
quietly keeping to herself
the music pounds and pushes
through walls that are now breathing.
Temperamental and moody
that advice of hers
she closes the space
here between the both of us
she whispers a set of commands.
Words mix and swirl
in the sweltering humidity
we’re anxious to actually meet.
Sweaty glasses slip from hands,
she turns, and her Asian eyes
latch onto mine
and I fall.
I stare at all the hours
drawn up and down her arms
thinking what it must of felt like
holding perfectly still,
just as the dripping needle
made its permanent marks.
I would of held her hand,
if only I had known
she wanted me there
alongside her stoic charms.
We’re here after hours
in this, her beautiful room
the monsoons pound hard outside
we move closer still
without ever truly revealing the mood.
She offers herself up,
asks for me to to draw
whatever it is I want.
With her tiny wrist in hand
the dragonfly on my forearm
is her new companion,
just as the others look
at the tattooed girl. -
There are counting flaws,
we all see different patterns
here in the everyday objects.
Still, something surround us.
From a young age
we’ve all been taught
to be careful
please do not
touch or disturb
certain surfaces.
It’s crazy to think tonight
love sits in the balance
some will freely fall,
while others will hang on
with a death grip.
Falling in love
is a positive diagnosis
it can take hold at any time
and strangle the best of us.
This fast spreading virus
a contagion that cant be stopped
jumping over our barriers
missing and or skipping the rest.
Empty are the looks
still searching for their person,
there are ones
who simply refuse to look
for they have already tested positive.
It’s hard to share a kiss,
but still, some of us
really don’t have that choice
we love how we feel
embracing the love inside ourselves.
With both arms spread out open
we rip off our masks
inviting the fever to infect
with a deep inhale
that crushing feeling
some see as reckless
fills every part of our being.
The fever has taken hold,
just as the next level starts
the losing of out stomachs
when that one person of yours
walks in the room
a nervous excitement.
Count me as one of those
who have been exposed,
I know the clock is ticking
there is only so much time
this time though,
I promise I won’t
love anyone else,
but you.
-
When time was limited
we rushed and hurried
forgetting all our little sayings.
When we were in such a rush
we let the hours pass,
however, we need to hurry up
feel and then say all those things,
say what loving meant to us.
The anger and hurt were there,
just the same too,
when time was limited
we weren’t always so good at
picking the best things to say.
Oh but today,
we have so much more to give
to be grateful for as we celebrate
the days that were just ours
to give away as we felt.
Come tomorrow,
we won’t need to explain
how all this came about
we’ll just show our pictures
the summer memories
when our bellies ached
stuffed full of laughter.
We played each night,
our room majestically decorated
underneath the soft flickering lights.
Yesterday when we were rushed
we never had time for
those intentional looks
I can remember reaching for you
softly from behind
only you knew I was squeezing.
It’s terrible to think
we’ve just one hour left
to say our goodbyes
how can one say anything
when our throats are this choked up?
If you don’t mind
we can sit and stare at each other
until our limited time
is up, my love
goodbye.
-
This day for lovers
all the parts are perfectly scripted
the players stand at the ready,
tonight will be a performance.
A soft almost delicate bracelet
glistening with newness
it’s hard to imagine
love could dull or vanish.
Yet today,
one anticipates
if the words will ever come?
Pulling the petals from flowers
am I loved or not?
Everywhere are bouquets of flowers.
The markets are super busy
a frantic search consumes the shoppers
on this ordinary day.
It’s hard to imagine
not having,
that flooded rush
the excitement of giving and receiving.
The love we seek
is truly out there
we get what we give
make today
the start of your own
Valentines Day.
-
Praying on broken knees to palms,
for this, my daily offering
to a filtered girl who asks
I gather my attention
and give up my words
so she can read
the words about herself.
She states or asks,
if I understand she wants me
writing poetry
for the span of my lifetime
a good 80 years of writings
often comparing
love’s pounding heartache.
She has the answers
that I subscribe to,
because in the end
I can’t help but to please her
I have this role to play
enabling her
to be my co-dependent lover.
I can’t wait
until she reads these words
and then demands
I erase them.
Her love is torture
I can’t help myself,
but to pray
to my muse.
-
With a set of written instructions,
oh please don’t forget,
a plea to take care of the beauties
there on the flower terrace.
There was an exact schedule to keep.
Pampered and perfectly guarded
she sits so perfectly still,
from the start until this moment
each day and night equally fell.
The pain that she was under
this is her true story,
our hero for always and ever
there trying to help
when she was there by herself.
And if we could swear
that this would be her forever spot
each one of us would promise
to take care of her flowered terrace.
-
Tell Me again
how many times
you’d spread yourself,
like some blessed thin layer
offering yourself to others?
In the curve of the left arm
she held the needle still
eyes were locked into eyes,
“Hurry love!”
In an instant
the fire was lit
so alive now
burning white hot.
One must admit
to have been blind before,
jealous perhaps,
with the fight or flight feeling inside.
How does one decide
to simply stand put
or to run and get away?
The girl is missed
and yet
words can’t fully explain
why she couldn’t feel,
the love,
she was injecting
into our veins.
-
To count every lock,
every obstacle of time
one can only imagine
the time it takes
to wander aimlessly around
trying to choose the exact key.
Are our first choices
always the best to consider
or should we wait
for a different answer?
The longevity of time
seems so impossible at times
especially when a handful of years
has gone quietly by.
Each lock has its own design
the tumblers are there to protect,
certain things are meant to be kept
away from the public eye.
Until that certain someone
comes and demands the key
refuse and they’ll pick that lock
what was once sealed and protected
is soon set free in their hands.
Unguarded to the truth,
it was an easy wish to ask
if I could see her later
I can’t seem to wait
just a couple of hours
before that pent up ache
has no else to bother.
She hates to admit
my lock and key analogy
has a hint of truth
because she, has the wanting monster
buried deep in her as well.
Her box is just as equally locked
she refuses to hand over the key
not until I have love in my eyes.
Only then will she concede the truth.
Neither of us want to love,
I try and explain
this kind of way,
we choose to keep things guarded
instead of free and open
life is less complicated.
It wasn’t until
that want inside
changed our minds
by reworking our agreement,
and from behind our backs
in that instant,
we were infected.
We knew we had no other choice
the fever was too much
I could easily spend hours
memorizing all her amazing flaws.
Anchored now to this girl
I can’t seem to move
with all the doors unlocked
she has the same condition
now at the point of giving up,
count me in,
because she’s still beautiful.
She asked to insert the words
sitting deep inside
this sickness goes both ways
she stopped hiding her symptoms
up close in her secret room.
Of course we’d break protocol
never thinking we’d ever get this way
from our casual kissing
to public love making.
The truth is,
we’d freely infect the others
if they dare get too close
and try to stop this virus
we’ve been warned of the dangers,
but still,
Count me in. -
This poem is affected by all the dark news on television this week. God bless all of us who have lost someone too soon. I could of left this as a draft but decided to to post anyway.
Those new to the site (I love you followers btw) this version of the site was started for a friend who was diagnosed with breast cancer 1/1/19. She asked if I could simply post a poem a day, as it helps her get through stuff.
I have her permission to update. The cancer is in her lung (inoperable) and has gotten larger. She’s a teacher on Hawaii and since this is her second go around with this cancer, there are no more sick days. She’s important to me simply because of our friendship. All of us have these friends in our lives. Love them.If I could have yesterday back
I would know how to react
after hearing the news.
Whenever we love this way
on the outside anyway,
it’s always a bitter taste
we try and swallow.
Still, no one would ever imagine
loving someone this way,
that word, in and of itself
would cause a lifetime of damage
if they were to ever go away.
There’s something different
about a diagnosis
like it gives us time to prepare.
Here today, I won’t question
we lost this part of us
taken away and swallowed up.
I won’t judge
all the choices or decisions
that will turn out to be
my choking hazards.
This time, I’ll come clean
and be the first to imagine
a single day without you,
how awfully quiet
to come out and pay attention.
I am your beautiful ransom
you can easily afford,
each day you pay the price
constantly reading my words
I’m thankful for you.
Even though, you’re technically
not allowed to cry
I still want to see
that look on your face.
So when you’re told of the news
I keep holding out hope,
that someday,
you’ll look at me
the same way, everything is ok
the thing has shrunk
you’re like everyone else.
The tragic news of today
plays out everywhere
it’s all too tragic to imagine
someone is making this up.
From inside today’s love story
there is this sickness
a romance wrought with decay
flowers lay unused.
This forbidden truth
never using that four letter word,
unless of course,
you intend on wearing
one of those surgical masks.
I feel something altogether different
pinned and pried to a fence
arms outstretched held in place.
I could lie like this for centuries
telling anyone who would listen,
she has this amazing sense
maybe then I’d get the full benefit
of having your attention
so all the others would know
I didn’t tie you up this way.
We can easily lay awake
and watch the news on tv
let decay pile up on them,
just not us today.
I can see just one other way
even as hopeless as it sounds
we can throw everything away
starve ourselves from all interaction
driving each other mad with fury.
We’d let our hunger meet our demands
and just in case we were being ignored
we’d turn the music up really loud
and bother the fuck
out of our neighbors.
So the lump hasn’t shrunk
it’s another year of fighting
I’m here to tell you right now
if you even think
of being on the tv news
you’ve got another thing coming. -
Each and every time
she twists and turns the key
I seem to always open up
and let her in.
The truth in her,
she wants to be closer
a true part of my skin
she’s just not satisfied until
we’re both underneath
sharing the same things.
Love’s decay,
holds on to me tightly
and I pray that this night
never ends because
we fit hand in glove.
I’ve cursed the jealous sun
to stay away,
leave me to my flooded night
leave me to my dysfunction.
Leave me alone in the dark,
just me and the girl
and our playlists.
I don’t expect to keep her forever
the cost for her attention
will bury me in debt
I can barely afford
the weight of always giving in,
it’s just easier,
giving up instead.
Love is the truth
I wish to avoid
I can’t take another
one of her breakups.
These physical nights
are more than enough
to satisfy the erotic Gods.
Defenseless to every kiss
every touch pushes me back
and backwards I freely fall
each and every time.
I’m unprotected
completely exposed
to the brokenness
she holds over me.
This fragile sorry side
the dominance is woefully blind
especially when
the girl is this soft.
Starting with the gentle knock,
her wanting look,
coming at my door
the night floods
underneath this super close girl.
She whispers,
demands to be let in
no sooner is the lock undone
she jumps in my arms
settles in and
takes her rightful place.
-
Slowly coming in
the cold air
is finally here.
I’m careful now
crawling up against
her soft textured skin.
This girl
and her kind of love
I’ve never felt before,
she’s the one.
This girl,
and all her romantic charms
she slinks up close
asks me to pretend
with every kiss,
she swears,
she’s exclusively mine.
The cost of loving
this time of year
when it’s so frigidly cold outside
this is the heavy price.
She wants some exclusive time,
this time, I can’t
get enough of her,
I pull her in
next to me and mine.
She promises, love,
with velvet little touches
she crawls underneath my skin.
Pin pricks to my attentive skin.
I feel small
curled up next to her
I’m drawn to her sex.
Let it go
let me warm my hands
she swears and promises,
I’ll get all hard
to go ahead and use her words
to get myself off.
She pushes up closer
the truth is this thin layer
close between us
she threatens me
I’d better let her in.
It’s no use, really,
living here
buried in her palm.
The girl squeezes tightly
I turn and pucker up
she twists even harder still,
be careful who you let in
from the cold air
this time of year.
-
The girl with conversation
ammunition coming from
her sweet meritless tongue.
She freely speaks
with this sexy attitude
where there are no limits
something that obviously
draws and attracts me in.
I’m her blind stranger
retelling a lifetime of memories
I make her laugh
I’m afraid to admit
she has me in her aim.
This is not about love
I’ve already fallen from
my high and righteous place.
I’ve already settled on this
the prettiest one,
the one who refuses
to say those usual words.
Those most basic of terms
that everyone else
so loosely throws away.
I’m tempted
to turn in on myself
and never type another word.
Maybe then
my inner voice
wouldn’t betray me
to the one
I’m hiding from
here on the outside
of this social world.
I could trust and believe
all my fucked up stories
buried here inside.
Accept me to be your fool
not the beautiful one
who everyone instantly loves.
I promise I’ll keep perfect count
keeping an exact and accurate
record of my time here.
I was recently asked
to come join this one,
this other kind of girl,
someone I’ve never thought
of considering before
still, these first times
are meant to be
tried and tested
I accepted the date.
I’m late now because
the beautiful one
wants my words
to be exclusively hers.
-
With an outstretched voice
typed out on this screen,
please don’t take offense
if I swipe left.
There’s something
about everyone
making them worth
being swiped right.
I may not feel this culture
stumbling around the room
going from conversation,
to conversation,
being judged
by questions
I’d never ask.
Still, I can’t help but consider
is this start of something?
All of this
might turn out to be nothing more
than something
all together different.
Let this writing be the start
the start of something pretty perhaps.
Just imagine if you will
all the handsome circles
we’d become a part of
with ridiculous amounts of money
getting us into places.
I can only think of
the one private part
where we secretly hook up.
Who’s to say
who’d want to jump first?
I’d let you start
without first asking
for a photograph.
My poetry
will have to be the source
where you choose
to stand
or jump with me.
All of this might be nonsense,
but to that one,
this could be
our crazy start.
-
Tonight the skies went quiet,
pandemic’s grasp came swiftly
my friend died today
a victim to Covid.19.
For the first real time,
this pandemic,
sits at my doorstep.
Uncomfortable cannot describe
this feeling of unsettled panic
like there’s still more
of a score to settle.
“Want not, waste not.”
something my friend would say,
perhaps my dose of reality.
Down on worshiping fists
prayers have gone unanswered
but still, I have one request
please don’t take his grieving widow
diagnosed as well.
She has a chance to recover
allow her to celebrate his life.
Only yesterday,
we were strangers, Covid19
you and your swift moving grasp
taking whomever you wish.
Everything happens by chance or reason
neither of them ever cared about you,
never worrying,
about a mask or protection.
If today marks our new horizon,
a world that’s now turned upside down
I am here to accept your challenge.
yes, we took the first painful blow,
eventually, we will be on top
our skin will take on a bronzed glow.
The healthy will fight this battle
some will ask, why them?
After years of this seasonal damage
only then can we answer
who actually won this battle.
I’m afraid in the end though
both sides will grieve
for their losses.
Rest in peace Ben
know that you are loved. -
Unclothed
the fable of the mermaid
lies quietly in my bath.
I swore
I wouldn’t tell
and it’s not likely
I’d be believed.
Anyway,
her soft sounds
the relief
of finally finding water,
this water,
with a hint of salt.
Slightly above tepid
her shoulders glisten
recharge
just underneath
her patterns
start to appear.
Scale-like
pillowy softness
there is this
resetting magic.
Her eyes
glisten inside
with the brightest blue
a self reflection.
She smiles,
everything falls apart
a dagger is pierced
forever wounding
she invites my hand
her lips
kiss fingertips.
A hand to skin
we’re inside talking
her unheard voice
words play
automatically.
A strange
new dialect,
a sort of clicking
her brilliant
ancient language.
It’s hard to imagine
putting her back
in our world.
In this moment,
she protests,
swears,
this is exactly where
she belongs
and stays.
-
What started out
as this backwards look or glance
the girl turned to inspect
the room full of strangers.
It didn’t take much
to take particular notice
the girl had a certain look
with eyes all dreamy
meant she’d soon be in love.
Love stopped all rational thought.
Stuck now, with her in mind
over and again
these first time chances
don’t come all that often.
Who would of imagined
the girl was a champion lover,
this perfect little start
so beautifully buried in my mind.
Her strength, it is in her knowing
the balance between the give and take
the transition between need to want.
She and her instincts, always there
laying lasting hands all over the surface
soothing our common flaws.
These are our sensitive desires
giving flawlessly to all other demands.
She doesn’t mind playing, in fact,
she performs with a hint of seduction.
The girl and her amazing charms
always there as a blessed reminder
she draws you in to watch
the way her hips move and sway
against the envious eyes of the others.
There is this wall closed-in around her,
she wants just one in there
to help set up and guard
the shimmering temple doors.
Good news, she’s ready for us to hear
the playlist that marks her mood.
She’s offering up the hours
so time can start to count,
this night is permanently marked
impossible now, to remove her
from all working memory.
She’s the trigger mark
to this heavily guarded gun of hers.
To pray at her favorite altar
folded hands in a favorable position,
hands, that ask for a single season.
We beg and still, she listens,
quietly keeping her cryptic answers
strictly to this beautiful whisper.
Accidental glances are all over her
eyes fall in and out of favor
and with perfect timing
her mouth asks to be kissed.
She wants more of the attention now,
inching closer with an invitation
her perfume has this affect
that permanently stamps memory
effectively rendering her
the one and only
from this moment forward.
-
Love means you’ll need convincing
keep your feet firmly planted
there in the sensitive garden.
At some point you’ll change
you’ll either give or take instructions
and just when you think you’re settled
you’ll be shown that there in the corner
is your biggest secret
that has yet to be revealed.
Eventually you’ll be convinced
to reveal that precious secret of yours.
Just agree, that someday
you’ll remove that thorn laden bush
the one thing that has kept you
so heavily guarded
keeping you from falling in love.
Be it at the beginning or at the end,
you’ll feel all accomplished
all weighted down in your love.
This side of you we haven’t seen before
mostly beautiful all calm and satisfied
over there in your own solitude
you have fail to notice
that one by one
your senses are becoming useless.
Maybe by instinct you’ll come back
the transitional lover,
all fluent in your new language
with magical charms out on display
showing us everything you’ve learned.
Envious are the eyes
that still crave you.
just in case you doubt change
trust that if you fall in love,
expect to read the mind of others
all while balancing a bowl of pearls.
This life with all the cycles
can quickly add up and fade
before you ask the others
why they have up and gone
make sure your eyes are wide open.
Ask for a guideline or a set of rules
learn why things happen,
and why they must change.
Make sure you’ re properly prepared
to be all loved and cherished.
Deny that piece inside
that insists on mirrors,
can simply look inside and be content,
with this, your forever person
long before you fall in love.
-
A cramped window
allows just enough sunlight
to feed temptation,
to read again.
Eyes fall on the latest letter
a struggle at this hour
oh to only see the girl,
standing perfectly still.
There in her late night gown or dress
it does not matter,
just as long as she has come.
I bring her mouth close to mine
we share the space,
she begs to be even closer
with the wish granted
without ever using the words
her eyes relay the hour.
Without too much effort
the Messenger lays strewn about
her heavy gaze settles
she doesn’t want to hear the words.
Dangerous touching against the edges.
We dance like this,
going around and around for centuries.
From first time fists
to heavy palming
we swim to keep at the surface.
Her purpose has turned
from behind, she slightly reaches
on her perfectly manicured toes.
Barely touching the ground now
she brings her hungry kiss
closer to Mine, but before we meet
I settled her in her favorite position.
Properly balanced of course
her divine submission
most find hard to comprehend
the electrical charge.
Her mood switches and turns,
bracing for the leathered palm.
The sound alone changed her direction
she wanted more of that hand.
A wave washed down her
stripped and wanting more.
The pleasure pain principle
left a sensitive mark
she squeezed tightly.
The cost of loving this way
meant everything had to be thought out.
From the start of all this
meant there were lessons to learn
she boldly thought she understood
being the perfect student
always eager to play the part.
She was introduced to her thorn,
her fucking unmistakable thorn.
She was free to start living this life,
just as long as she stood perfectly still
being pretty underneath the skin
had always been a gift of hers.
Today we killed the Messenger
there is no more need
for her delivered words.
-
With eyes red,
dust she’d swear.
From the far off reaches
Violet was wandering
alone in the desert,
just as her throat begs,
she thinks of her Sir.
His heavy handed use of words
always flooding her
it hasn’t rained in years
and yet, Violet is hopeful
tonight there will be this downpour.
She turns and writes
“doubt the stars are fire
doubt the sun doth move
doubt truth to be a liar
just never doubt thy love.”
Just as swiftly,
as she etched Shakespeare
with a withered and dried stick
she stares at what must of been
a limb from strong growing tree.
There is change in everything,
oh but not this,
the words to her Sir.
She smiles to think
He has to be sick with worry
she kicks her prophetic words
written softly in sand
back into the surface of the land.
Dear Sir,
with all due respect
I must beg
for just a few more seasons
before we can properly be
introduced in person.
with love,
Violet.
-
Maybe you won’t
say you love me
in a way I’d believe,
besides, who’s counting the petals
she loves me,
she loves me not.
To the girl
who started following today
your love of water
is all together
something I could touch and feel.
The newness in words,
she struggles still
with the weight of the world
always expecting her
to meet certain life markers.
When will you..
or when are you going to…
It’s only when
those types of questions fade
she can comfortably live
in her well manicured skin.
This poem today
written on my phone
I’m trying to kill time, waiting.
I can’t stop thinking
how that pretty girl
fell in love
with the feel of water.
I wonder if,
it matters not,
the temperature between
feeling like she belongs
holding on to her familiar things
or does she embrace the unknown
taking pretty chances.
Can she stand the heat
as the water slowly turns
from a tepid look
to a blood cursing boil.
Love denied,
meant something was asked
and at this hour
as I sit here waiting
she’s all I can think about.
-
There are love-sick words
found in the good envelopes
where I get the chance
to relieve my love drawn eyes.
To simply read your soft openings
in the words where you confess
just how much you love me and mine.
Anything that comes from
your love stained hands
I’m drawn to you and yours.
No other one has ever mattered,
all this much to me,
it’s just you, can’t you see
just as long as I’ve had your letters
they keep me coming here.
I hurry and rush
to quietly open a kissed envelope.
I can’t wait to be alone with
you and your private thoughts
your words have a way
of erasing the empty spaces
you fill my room with verses
and I swear I can smell you
a wisp of your eternal perfume.
The everlasting rush of excitement
my righteousness as I feel
I’m reading love-soaked words.
The common world fades,
life begins to disappears
behind a curtain of sorts.
Everyday for a year,
I’ve had your letters
filling my uneven cracks.
It’s only when
I get your letters
feelings come alive inside.
I honestly find myself
counting down the time
until the post is delivered
I suffocate from tightening thoughts
that moment I get to rip it open
that hand picked envelope
my name written in your style.
The color changes
I’m flush with anticipation
maybe this is what you meant
when you promised
I’d crave every word.
The undeniable truth
our year ends tomorrow and
I’m not ready to leave it all behind,
the perfume and excuses
I cherish the routine of you.
If tonight, I were to ask
if you’d reconsider
writing another solid year
would that be
too much to ask?
-
The agreed upon set of words
always meant we’d have time
those minutes came fast and flooding.
And all at once
we were deep inside,
living the words in songs
in love, technically
there was nowhere to stand.
Me and those hands,
I hope you won’t mind
when I reach in and grab
that little piece inside
that’s exclusively mine.
You spoke the inside words
backwards on a table
there in front of my eyes
it was easy to lay there watching
memorizing each sensitive line.
I adore time and attention
because attention and time
have arrogantly always been mine.
The forever look or gaze
came from somewhere lost
I can clearly see every piece
your love has meant something,
now as the season is set to change
can you believe how much time
you’ve spent with me
alone in my mind.
Quietly keep these words to yourself
don’t let anyone in on
that you couldn’t help yourself
wanting time and attention
to be our exclusive event.
Today I’m sick of remembering
what yesterday must of felt like
when you were so excited,
your eyes all lit up
it was easy then
to memorize the inside words
as long as it meant
you were the girl.
-
Once the numbers had started
we knew there was no going back.
So early and often,
each turn was met with a choice,
and so, the number combinations
stopped being a coincidence.
With the girl firmly in hand
she secretly swore,
these feelings we were having
were simply passing pounding.
I was eager to believe her,
and in this way,
she calmed the nervousness
in not knowing how or why
the temptation in counting
seriously surged through us
and fuck, did we play.
Numbers were tied
and stretched out in her room.
Yesterday was such a foolish year,
voices came and went
and just as unexpectedly
love cut across both our throats.
We bled out
stupidly ruining our already clean shirts.
Still, the numbers made sense,
and in their own complicated way
we couldn’t just simply stop counting.
Love’s decisive sickness
had only grown complicated and strong,
and before we knew it,
we were looking back on yesterday
like it never truly happened.
It’s been a decade now,
love has gone all dumb and blind
with no real excuse or reason
11:11 still comes up.
-
Motivated to try and inch up
getting close means the trigger source
will be there to touch and play
with a string of heavy demands
commanding time and attention
to be exclusively ours.
In other words,
what I meant to say
was go ahead and come close
tiptoe there on the edge,
so that eyes are up into eyes.
These are our first times
even if, we’ve been here
a thousand times before
you ever decided to move.
From this night forward
guard our forever bond
don’t let it get stolen
from distracted hands.
From this and that
make today your favorite mission
change everything if you must,
make the pleasure in giving
a part of your daily plan.
You and your lists
keeping track of the minutes
until we’re back in position
that place where one simply gives
while the other takes.
-
With a thousand blinks and sighs
Violet hid quietly from the world.
And up until her words needed life
she was perfectly content in knowing
she loved with everything
never leaving things for chance.
Against the usual misunderstandings
she was more than tangled inside
living with a half-broken heart
Violet was denied the truth.
With a set of heavy lies
her love was excused
no longer cherished by her one.
Violet, had in fact,
had no business expecting
that everything she was ready to give
was somehow going to be returned.
Violet was replaced instead
by something that never truly mattered,
she was left holding handfuls of regret.
Betrayed by a darkened moon-less night
Violet held her knees to her chest
and waited for the bath water
to fill her bathroom with noise
so she could finally cry it out.
For months now,
Violet takes late night baths,
in that tiny bathroom of hers
so she can keep all her pretty secrets
perfectly guarded for now.
-
I wish to sip from that cup
guarded there in your hands.
I promise I’ll devote every inch
and drink every ounce.
I swear I’ll put eyes on top of eyes,
so stare if you must,
just as long as this last hour
is exclusively ours.
I simply want to lay in your arms,
against your chest, your breath
and the closer I get to the edge
you hold me even tighter still.
I go uninterrupted into the night.
You wait until everything has gone still
the room flooded with jagged light
there is something about your perfume
each inhale in our flower garden
the hours we spent on the lessons
with you and your beloved thorn,
still, your stubbornness wins
keeping me comfortable and warm
here as I begin to slip.
-
The choice is between
the written or spoken words
from the person I’m most in love with,
and yes, some can’t comprehend the importance
however, I suggest you take a moment
and thoroughly explore them.
Oh to tell a story with exaggerated expressions
arms move and sway with action,
there to simply reinforce intentions.
We belly laugh with anticipation
what was and what’s lost
are both found when we talk.
Now to the fun
lying in bed with our travel voices
pretending the voices in our heads
are what the author had intended.
To read our favorite book aloud
taking turns while thumbing through pages.
The climax comes crashing
just as the secrets are revealed.
True love still conquers all
or so says “The Time Traveler’s Wife.”
I can still see every expression you made, and yet,
there are some who refuse to read.
This life has been too profound
balancing in between
the schematic written words,
while some prefer,
the oral tradition in stories
passed down for centuries.
To suggest I am paralyzed by this late hour
does not mean I won’t read to you
quite on the contrary indeed,
in fact, I’ll mix both
the written and spoken words alike.
I’ve asked, almost prayed I guess
for someone to please
come and decipher my favorite book.
She loves me, or so she says
she just doesn’t have enough time
I can still count the number instances
where she swears and confesses
she loves me a million more times.
Those words have worn their welcome out.
I suppose I’ll go and read a book to myself
at least in there it’s predictable, after all,
all amazing written works of art
eventually come to that part
where we slow savoring every word
so that in the end whether told or read
we ache for another to start.
-
I can clearly taste
the exact places you’ve been,
because in my eyes,
unlike all the rest
those traveled places
become the cherished little gifts.
Stripped for me
you stand in your place
ready to let me feed
your wrist, the first offering.
I trace until your eyes fall backwards
and in this nothingness
of a thankful holiday
those seated closely around the table
have no true idea
the secrets you keep.
That very best side of you
hides and shields the dark,
that blessed side in you
no one wants to admit,
I swear it’s your glamour guide
that gets whatever she wants.
The precious spoiled child
forever and always
getting everything
perfectly content and happy
for just a while at least.
I’m the one buying mirrors
to feed your narcissistic side
properly pampered and nourished
you and your insatiable diet.
After all, your best outfits
come alive, when all the all the eyes
want a piece of you.
Temptations drug
to have the words of a poet
inched up super close
whispering the exact commands
to be followed.
My pretty companion,
only One needs to understand
the code written in here.
Kneel and decipher please
these thoughtful messages
spread out all over
Dragonfly Poetry.
-
Tripping over the last time
I felt you loved me,
the neon glow inside
doesn’t quite work
how it used to when
your quiet footfalls
walked alongside me.
I don’t mind if we
could be like
how we used to be.
There’s something safe about
knowing what I don’t.
I turn to see if it’s true and real
you spinning a room
in dizzying circles.
All over and around me
I fall backwards,
to your bed that has always caught me.
Tepidly ignored
for the first real time tonight
my place is not next to you and yours.
I turn to the one quiet place,
that little nearby church
with the well traveled steps.
I hope you’re happy now
I’m here to confess
I’m a perfect stranger to you.
Bless me if
it’s been a while since
I’ve been in this place
confessing to the truth
that lies inside me now.
The irony here
I swear I’ve never felt this other way,
the upside down pushed away
size of it all.
I have to believe
that holding sorrows hand
is the best thing for now.
-
The inspiration was never too far away
from yesterday and forward
I swore I would take each day
pretending it was some cherished gift.
Spend time with me,
so we can illustrate love
behind the backs of everyone
while they pray in church.
Oh my goodness,
you’re prettier than I ever imagined,
the pictures you sent
didn’t show this other side.
Your handsome half-glance
looking back at me
it’s easy to understand why
I fell forward and on top of you.
We can street talk if you want
whisper to the backs of hands
right alongside all the others
they’ll find something else to look at.
The taste of your perfume
a new trigger for sure.
I swear you’re different
when I look inside
the places you’ve mentioned,
oh those darker traveled places
I simply want to hand hold
and nervously play the part.
I know you’re out there wanting
searching just in case
you’re too far away to be heard.
Listen to the excitement in my voice,
understand I’m over the moon
searching for the path you took
to disappear and float the truth.
I can remember still,
the very way your tapping kisses felt
softly covering every inch.
I’m finally free
stronger than I’ve ever felt
my faith is gathering momentum
down on broken knees to palms
love is spilling out
ruining your already swept floor.
I’m praying for night to come soon,
so that tomorrow
you’ll have found your way
right back inside
deep under the covers.
-
Her eyes awash in this particular shadow
she narrowed her focused
it was the warmest of warm.
Her fingers centered and cupped perfectly
one could seemingly drink forever
and it went on like this for hours.
To be hand picked or chosen
it felt amazing to be her prized possession
to give without permission, she said.
The very essence of her control
did not matter,
just as long as the drug continued
there was no depth
one wouldn’t go.
With all the right questions
I thought of asking
I was arranged and managed
by the plight of the narcissistic reaction
it appears, there was one such question
I forgot to ask,
could you love more than just yourself?
This contemptible act
I was falling from favor
her hands would no longer
be capable of cupping water.
Thirst if you wish, you pathetic fool
her once open palms
now fists for reactions.
In a lowly half-broken voice
she mouthed her answer.
The mood matched by my demeanor
I could tell the end was near
perhaps by design
or some stroke of magic
the girl softly kissed the moment
and let go.
***************
Left over words
***************
Hindsight and her golden reaction
to be brought forward for her inspection,
and just as I stepped forward
she wanted a little more.
With no patience
her voice demanded,
my attention was exclusively hers.
From time to time
she’d stop and question
expecting the answers to change.
Still, as the night pushed forward
all I ever wanted
was the simplicity of hand holding.
I can’t say when I fell for her,
the wait between the time with her
started to weigh more and more.
Somehow I knew
I’d be her immortal love for sure
Against these words she swore
-You make–•
-the–•–links–•
–•in–•–chains–•
•–grow—•stronger–
•–in–•me–•
The forever bond
has been properly sealed
leftover are the feelings
I have for her.
-
Coming from my sacred place
I know how my mind works
and quite honestly
I can easily claim
I wish I never knew what to say.
Clearly I can go back
and remember a time
when her fame
was all that ever mattered.
I can remember the taste,
the joy we felt,
devouring the hours hungrily.
The girl had her faults and charms
to me she was as perfect as anyone.
What difference had it meant
even I clearly knew
this girl wasn’t strictly mine.
You see,
sharing things
was the girl’s critical flaw
and somehow
she gave much too much of herself.
It was almost as if
she wasn’t allowed to love.
I wasn’t better than
or hold a stronger hand
the problem I had
with this girl I loved
she couldn’t care
who was who.
She would meet them there
and bring them here
to have them quickly
fall in line.
A cog in a chain,
as the list quickly grew
disgust had a new life.
It never truly mattered
being the most beautiful one
beauty was never denied.
So as I sit here now
and profusely claim
She was the first
if ever there was.
(Left Over Thoughts)
the more I shared
she lay imbedded now
in thoughts of guilt and distrust.
The girl I knew
has been gone for years
and yet
next to me
her ghost clearly stands.
I can see the lines in her face
her complexion has grown
she’s tired now
afraid to be left on her own.
-
Tell me to stop writing
I’m pretty sure I can’t
just move on and go.
You’re out of my grasp
sure, I’m reminded I should let it slip
it was something you said
there’s no one better than you
to love me in this lifetime.
Change is an honest friend
my reminder time moves,
just every now and then
you come with slow hands
the flood of light blinds.
There are easier ways I’m sure
to get safely under the bright sun.
Yesterday was a start
asked to spend time,
careful respect,
I won’t move too fast or too slow.
-
The temperamental softer side
touches and plays with loss
yesterday was easy to say goodbye.
Today against 4 equal promises
voices tempt to tell me otherwise,
the whole hole you left inside
it was no surprise my optimism was fooled.
All emotions have been buried and covered up
still, the soil is swept clean
exposing these sensitive words
a son losing his mother to cancer.
I can already tell just how much quieter
that big kitchen of hers will sound
in the deafening silence
everyone is standing around.
The void is still as big and wide
as the day she left
ordinary or otherwise
November is here again
to celebrate her life.
Happy Birthday Mom.
-
There in the sunlight
playful things begin
a pressed mouth plays for me.
And from the start of things
everything has always worked out,
I know I have a few hours still
until everything gets too heavy and dark.
She’s always easy,
she shares her web with me,
from the corner of her window
to the forsaken latch on her door.
I have no other real choice,
but to offer myself up to her
the pleasure comes in waves.
She gathers herself
atop her favorite place,
she shifts and uses the dark
to profess her favorite words to me.
To think aloud about such things,
wouldn’t be appropriate
she moves and insists
we stand for the rest of this
there on tiptoes
she balances and pushes back into me,
on this, her hallowed eve.
-
With eyes lit up and on alert
the night was awash in a storm
I needed to stand by her.
Circles touch and play
with her half busy look,
just as the seasons are about to change
the girl suspends her love for now.
The flood rush can wait for now
from yesterday until tomorrow turns
we swore we’d never leave.
Tonight we’ll play and pretend
we’re letting the sky and leaves settle
down on broken knees to palms
we take handfuls of each other
and smother that scent on open palms.
This, the heavy night we lay under
waiting on the outside temperatures
to settle and calm down.
From nowhere the question was begged,
she stood there hiding her secret,
stunned with her time away
hands reach and touch the spot
eyes are buried inside each other
we look and stare as if
this will be our forever season
here at last.
-
Star drunk lover
go ahead and cast your spell
on the eve of another night
let the heavy love-like breathing start.
I can already tell
it’s going to be easy
spending these 10,000 hours alongside you.
I hope you won’t mind if
I sing the songs I keep under my bed
it’s fair to suggest
I could very easily
act like some romantic fool
and creep inside your head
writing poetry all night.
We go out and eat like
it’s some kind of taste test
small samples, then we fill out the sheet
I pass my wallet and bill to you
you’re better at that tipping math than me.
You reach and put your hands
deep inside my pockets
we walk like this for hours.
I know I’m too tall for you
to actually come and whisper
the words that are all trapped in,
you’re dying to get inside,
you shout how much you love
the funny thing is or was
yesterday, I was buried underneath
it’s impossible to know right now
why you’re giving so much,
still, we walk hand in hand
searching for a safe place
to…
-
She craved the sensitive words
wanting that infectious tight grip
taking her to an edge
tiptoeing trying to keep up.
The stinging kisses left their mark
and none of her friends
could ever truly understood.
The truth in leather I suppose,
this particular girl liked being spanked,
it was her delightful pleasure source.
The one and exacting rule
she had to be properly behaved,
the spankings came from playful love.
If this was the shocking thrill of it all
her tiny waves properly flooded the room,
and she’s the cautious type,
to just give this pleasure away.
The “Connectedness” is binds us
and in our way we explore
the tight rope side of love.
Disguise how you feel inside,
she used to say,
sometimes what was meant to be
can end up making you very happy.
With happiness aside,
her perfectly curved bottom
really felt good in the hand.
I can’t deny the rush
that flat palmed smack made.
The tightening grip around my…
A natural excitement in just thinking
and I want to nudge her awake now
let the hours begin to turn.
Listening to words in my ear pods
it doesn’t make a difference
how quiet the room has fallen.
The ache of wanting her
wanting me, I nudge and whisper
she rolls and says,
“Please Sir as You wish.”
-
With more and more I suppose
we’ve started to collect and gather
our unique and divine love~trinkets.
In our late night hour jaunts
our busy hands are magnetized
touching and hiding in places
we probably don’t belong, but still
I’d rather be in this place
alongside the girl with the heavy eyes.
I never have to worry about change,
each and every night is the same
out alongside my traveling companion.
I love watching the warm wind
play and pull at your hair
exposing the want from eyes.
Love inside love,
that gentle tipping point
pushes and shoves the mood
we have no other real choice,
but to pull over and attend our need.
By the night’s pretty end
we empty our pockets
starting from the front door
leading back to that little table
by your side of the bed.
The floor is dutifully littered
we’re sure to be careful
come each morning
we can’t wait
to start all over
gathering love’s trinkets.
-
Words sit strangled,
choked by two sets of thoughts,
here she sits separate, but equal.
Some words come from us,
our handsome stranger,
unwavering in truth and kindness
unless there is a lie
that needs to be told.
We give perhaps
more than what was initially bargained.
There is this whole other side,
where she turns into something
all together unbelievable
and it’s pretty to watch I suppose.
In a sense she is desired
having been blessed with her looks.
It’s a dangerous game to behold
heads turn when she arrives or exits,
it’s hard to keep attention focused.
One initially feels lucky,
having held this amazing prize,
people are not our possessions
to be counted and stacked in a line.
Just as equally and
just as blindly
this seemingly perfectly balanced girl,
can turn into something,
sometimes it’s hard to watch
the world spin around her,
still though, she has no idea
just how much I love her.
-
Unapologetic music plays ever so sweetly,
while the weight of yesterday turns
we made out and did other things.
From across the bedroom
two very proper arrows
stuck and found their perfect mark.
Still, we insist on taking turns
trying not to flinch or turn,
the sweat on our bodies is pretty.
The want plays and touches the mood
and just as the desire builds
you introduce a third person.
Standing almost too closely
you bring your mouth to his
watching for a reaction,
with a twisted turn
eyes curse the blessed game.
There on the edge of 1st limit
your lips touch
kissing my already broken shoulder.
With the return of things by my side
I can once again
start counting out loud
by pulling on all the petals
she loves me,
she loves me not.
-
I felt like loving again
here against a second chance today
something stirred in her too.
She reached out just the same to me,
coming across the finish line
all out of breath and sincere,
for as blind as I might be
even I know what the truth to be.
This time won’t be any different
because time away has a way
of interrupting everyday thought.
The surface tension always sinks in
she’s going to drive me insane again.
I can’t quite cut her from veins,
just when I think I’m all settled and good
she finds her way back in and
that fucked up switch inside me
starts loving her all over again
with my selective amnesia.
She makes it impossible
to properly think of anyone else
with that laser focus of hers
she already knows every weakness.
I have no other real choice
than to properly attach
our symbolic collared sapphire necklace
letting the world know
we’re a couple again.
-
I am no ones perfect
against a million blinks and sighs
I can’t help but do this look stare
in all honesty, I’m standing here
just wanting to fall on top of you.
If it meant I needed to confess
I’d be the first to admit,
I’d bend on broken knee to palm
and say the fucking words.
I am no ones perfect,
we could plan all our days out
and still have room
for first time things to occur.
On the edge of a first kiss
it’s hard to explain why
things must go excruciatingly slow
with no real reason why, other than,
I need to remember and record
the moment all these bottled up feelings
were shaken and stirred,
released, and freely given to the world.
I’m sorry if my heavy circles,
leave marks behind,
it’s just, I need your warm softness.
I promise to trace the words
on top of your nakedness
from behind
that vulnerable side of yours
is beyond divine.
I promised
and I’ve delivered
just keep in mind
I am no ones perfect.
-
The spirited change
I gain when I’m near or next to you,
there is this fucked up detonation
I can’t stop thinking of the girl,
it’s quite dangerous if we touch.
Yesterday, wearing that tiny swimsuit
I watched their envious eyes
clip and undress the rest of you
naked in such a public way.
The better part of me gave in
I covered you up with a hug,
just as the water bit and stung.
This child-like playful side
swimming in the tropical water
a pod of dolphins could be heard
piercing the quiet underneath.
I loved how slippery and warm we felt
in that death grip of yours
we bobbed and floated with the current.
The sun gently touched and kissed
highlighting your already bronzed features
the Goddess emerged perhaps
and you knew they were looking
you laid on top and from behind
you whispered the words.
Knowing the reactions they’d elicit
you were instructed to hold your position
cupped and curled like spoons
the sun started its descent
the jealous moon was begging
to come out and play for the first time.
Today, goodbye is gone
so say the love making treasures,
offered up there on the beach.
-
Like yesterday
and the day before
we want things to remain the same,
to be all predictable and boring
just as it’s always been.
Honestly, you’ve lied to us before
I know what’s coming,
come tomorrow,
with her heavy rains
for some time now
even I tried to ignore the quiet
with everything being so empty
heavy are the circles
I’ve spent hours to days
tracing and outlining
what I thought would make a difference.
Still, the blue skies
break just the same.
-
Both sides of the day
play heavily in their minds.
What started out as ordinary
has quickly turned to divine.
Sharp tasting foods make life bitter,
as equally are the sweet sugary things
these are their binding agents
words mixed with a hint of desire
starting a want that’s hard to extinguish.
If not by love, then where shall I look?
I know how easy it is to get lost
don’t bother trying to find it in a book,
the author has yet to start writing.
Wait here patiently under the sun
time will pass seemingly unnoticed
blessed by all the treasured looks
the passerby’s with all their attention
I wonder when time will start anew.
Who will be the first to decipher
the true and exact meaning of this poem.
-
This title is not for the attention alone,
the girl wants more explicit detail
something akin to having to
hide her phone while reading these poems.
Listen, I completely want you
starting from the bottom of your feet
when we fuck you press them to my chest
those perfectly manicured toes
kissed are kissed and bit until they curl
you get this look when you cum.
Perhaps your heels is the reason why
your calves are deliciously defined,
moving upward to your thighs
the strength there in your scissor kick
freshly shaven skin, I want my oiled hands
there on your backside, the curve and all
the tan lines, success, I lift your ass up.
Knees properly kneel and scoot forward
I can easily see your sex from here
hands trace and outline, cupping all of you
and as you press downward, two fingers
separate and explore, slowly bringing
forth your hard excitement,
clit to thumb and I press downward.
My entire palm covers you completely
you grip onto the railing of my arm
rocking forward and back again
the friction builds to her soft whimper.
“I could not hear you.”
My eyes dig into her and she locks on
“May i, Sir?” There is something about her
using the trigger words, right on cue.
Holding to my wrist
the girl is quickly spun over
scooting to the edge of the bed
she takes the tip of Me
I place a finger inside her
she squeezes My wrist hard
very hungrily she swallows
I watch her throat gag a little
there’s no way I’m releasing.
I take the wisp of her ponytail
and slow her down, otherwise,
the visual of the girl, her mouth
“i want you to cum with Me,”
and with her eyes dialed in with Mine
My wrist was tuned to her mouth
we with one good thrust,
“Fuck.” It’s hard to describe the release,
the girl and her brilliant charms
cast a spell so immense
this combined feeling flooded the room
and with each new stroke or push
a wave seriously pummeled us.
We lay there half broken,
she wanted to kiss,
“but I’m in there!?!?”
^^That made her laugh.
Put the phone away
and get back to work!
-
Lightly sun-kissed freckles
her skin gets even softer
here in these summer hours.
With two very distinct tan lines
cutting diagonally across her bottom,
she knows the contrast is desired
she loves watching His eyes light up
a trigger for her beloved.
A thumb tips her chin,
she softly smiles.
The girl wants to firmly feel his hand
warm natural wetness
she wiggles while pushing back
her secretly sworn addiction,
the hard palm of His hand.
There aren’t words to explain
why the girl gets this way
something about her offering
and how big his eyes stare.
The stinging finally surrenders
she can trace His outlined fingers
highlighted above her bikini tan.
The pleasure of her surrender,
still, she begs her Sir.
Most cannot understand
how divine restriction feels,
when wrists are tied tightly behind
by a skilled braided cord.
It’s easy for her to relax
she welcomes Him in.
Out there under the warm sun
this afternoon her curves were His
to do as He might wish.
-
This was her hour
sitting and waiting high above the others.
The girl was given her instructions,
but still she was so heavily torn.
Nothing had ever come easy,
all that He instructed
was to comfortably kneel and wait.
Sensitive to please, she loved this path
she turned to listen for Him
making sure eyes and palms
were properly down.
she pressed her tiny body on the spot,
that was until, she got all distracted
by a sweet smelling letter on His desk.
Does she dare or was that her test?
The corner of this envelope
one could tell
had been doused in perfume
the girl found herself overwhelmed.
Eyes couldn’t stand the torture anymore
just one tiny glance couldn’t hurt,
she touched the envelope
and when it fell, she flinched.
she knelt there staring at it
it was obviously not hers
her face and chest began to burn.
With a quick flick of the wrist
that damn envelope was returned,
this was her test.
she was kneeling again so perfectly still.
Her heart sank thinking
what if He’d seen her mistake.
That envelope sat mocking her
and she knelt there with an ache
her shoulders weighed heavily now.
The disappointment in moving an inch,
forgetting, she chose to be the girl.
she was more disciplined than this,
she hated weakness,
she cursed her thorn.
He entered their room,
tipped her chin
eyes faced forward,
just not at Him.
she knew if her eyes
were to look into His
the room would spin
and words would get all messy.
He turned to her
with this poetic kind of whisper
in her hand He placed
the perfumed envelope.
-
Still, she never truly asked
if time and attention was hers
to gift and share as she pleases.
Still, she’s the one with the contract
our working document
spelling out the terms
how and when we’ll interact.
She insists this all just an act
playing the perfect princess
who’s a little too noble to share
and she swears she needs the discipline.
Heads turn and watch, they stare really,
and I love watching her play her part.
“i give my permission to just one, Sir”
and I smile at her because,
this lifestyle in the wrong hands
can have disastrous affects.
Still, the girl must please as she wants
she’s something of a throw back,
she insists, the world is full of this
these ancient traditions and contracts.
Trust, she says to this arrangement,
that if it wasn’t pleasurable for her
she wouldn’t be doing it.
It, I say to her
can’t be quantified alone
to say you choose is wrong
what happens when you loose control?
There we were,
her own words hung heavily
she turned with a brilliant smile
“we’ll just have to see,
now won’t we?”
The girl and her thorn
digging into her palm deeply
she has so much more to give
it’s 4am and it’s time to awake her.
-
Each timetable stands on its own merit.
There has to be a certain balance
in the air where perfume hangs.
This room has a calm demeanor
from an occasional whiff of a cigarette,
except, no one there smokes.
This passing moment
sits heavily in the throat
a hard pulse nervously keeps a rhythm
there are proper expectations
outcomes one must keep.
Some take pride in their exacting nature
the joy of following every detail
the best have always pleased.
The girl turns with an obvious question,
and yet, no one offers their reply.
She turns in a more loving manner,
as if this will ease their minds.
It’s an all together too private a moment
for someone to just blurt an answer
still, she knows what she’s done.
She must behave, she hides her thorn
no one will ever notice
it is driven deep in her palm.
It’s sometimes hard not to notice
the pleasurable pain in her face,
still, we try and play along after all
this day has started like all the rest.
There are certain events
that only she acknowledges.
She holds the cord tightly in fists,
and every now and then,
she gives a good hard yank
making sure you’re paying attention
to her well timed
and beloved words.
-
The morning flowers ready themselves,
an early sun warms velvet petals
birds are the first to celebrate.
Last night got dangerously cold,
even still, it’s the middle of summer
no one wants to hear our complaints
about carefree and everlasting mornings.
Today will be an even longer day,
too many people know our faces
the once generous giving hands
have up and moved away.
Everyone has their favorite street corner
a place set back in the shadows
somewhere to sit and watch.
Just as the day moves forward
the sounds grow louder
and just as it was before
we are forced to move on.
-
With arms tightly folded
her hourglass silhouette lay there,
just as the hour softly turned
time was nearly out.
On knees to broken palms
he did everything to get to her,
the words he whispered had no affect.
She was tight lipped and in control,
he asked if she were ready
stepping forward and offered a kiss
softly to her shoulder, nothing happened.
With more weight weighing him down
there was a sweet smelling scent
the girl and her tepid perfume
her skin glistened lightly.
Eyes were hard to adjust
at this time of night
the true intentions of his want
he wanted nothing more
than to simply wake her.
A glass vase lay smashed
on an already swept floor
by the previous attempts.
Careful not to walk barefoot
there was no real choice,
he had to wake the girl.
Her room has been waiting for centuries
the candles have totally burnt out.
There under a shimmering blanket
the prized girl lay quietly still.
Asleep for one hundred years
a curse to make her immortal.
A heavy hand pinched super hard.
Aroused by this stunning reversal,
all her wishes came down to this kiss,
he put his mouth to hers.
Instantly, she was jolted awake,
his eyes laid heavily in hers.
Still, he leaned in and kissed her harder
the room spun her fully awake.
Her throat could only manage a whisper
a prized single word she mouthed,
“Sir.”
-
Last night your perfume transferred
you were left on my sheets
when they smell like this
I can’t help but write.
Listen, you’re the girl
riding on the saddle
thumbs hooked and guiding
loosely around your waist
making sure your ride is steady and safe.
Together we go up and over
all the hills and valleys.
This ride of ours
is going to go both ways
through the rough dark places
to the bright gentle walk
softly meandering through water.
Hips famously sway
like you’re a natural cowgirl.
The push and pull of last night
has left certain marks,
this dance of ours
can’t be taught because
this connection is different
starting and ending with
a mixture of rough and delicate.
We inch up super close
it feels good to lay with you
counting out all our fucked up feelings.
There’s a whole bunch of love
we’re constantly jumping over,
when you wear those tiny outfits
wasted and wanting more of you.
Maybe you’re my first time girl
and I’m supposed to behave
to act a certain way,
the only problem with that is
I’m hardwired to want more of you.
We’re awful at keeping secrets
I can promise you this though,
forever and always
is always for you
I want you back
on the saddle
soon.
-
Emotions fell by the wayside
there wasn’t much to discuss,
flashbulbs seemed to do all the talking.
Summer meant being wasteful
sunbathing with late afternoon drinks
reading about some heinous murder.
People were warned to stay away from her
time passed without too much interference,
that was until, she fell in love.
The dreadful circumstances of feeling,
she hated giving, but worse than that
her narcissism was now given a voice.
She couldn’t control her outbursts anymore
her drinking had increased ten-fold
and the more she tried to put hate on him,
the deeper she found herself in her head.
Sure, there were happy couples around her
clearly she was smart enough to copy them
she couldn’t quite duplicate their look.
The harder she tried avoiding him
other pieces were magnified in her life,
glaring, missing pieces that one can’t forget.
Still, as long as she had her phone
she could trick herself into thinking
that her anonymously secret feelings
would get to him unnoticed.
-
With time and attention returned
it was altogether too agonizing to leave her,
from the first time until now
the spirit guide has dragged me back.
There on the edge of her careful side
her dress up nights are always fun
playful tiny outfits that are just enough
to keep these eyes from going blind.
With a handful of lovely gifts
her wrists are properly tied
to the corners of our tightly drawn out bed
she’s curved and stretched in submission.
This begging position
has always been exclusively hers
wanting has always been her plan.
The girl and her coveted positioned
she balances on elbows on a couch,
enticing the hour to surrender
love-sick drawn attention for sure
and now with the record secure
the girl wants her place to return.
With the contract dutifully executed
tonight our story can begin.
-
The strong output returns
in here all alone with her,
a torturous downpour continues
this is why we lay here and wait.
Hands slip inside of hands
the rain dances and insists
we go along with the weight
so we start this kissing game.
Super light whispers at first
placed on the edge of my chin,
she brings her delicate side
and we fill her empty room
with these heavy sounds.
Just as the hour threatened me
it was my turn to play the game on her.
With the curve of words
I outlined syllables on her earlobe
very harshly biting down.
The sun got bored and left us there
we never saw the room grow dark,
still, we were very hungry.
Her stomach grew louder
from inside her bedroom
fogged up windows blurred the view
lost in the precious hours,
she needed to eat,
properly propped up on elbows.
Feeding her against the backdrop
of playing a kissing game
with a set of expensive chopsticks
of all things, she loves
being this close.
-
At a time in our lives
when we clearly know everything
what a brilliant waste of time we are
and I say “we” because,
there are many parts to the whole
of who we truly are.
If I am the writer
and you’re the reader
we have a symbiotic relationship
where both sides are harmonized.
So I choose to see the world
through my colored glasses
I wish to include you
alongside this allegory with me.
After all, what would your mornings be
if there wasn’t a challenge
which is one reason why
I want you to try
to want not waste not
for 24 hours with me.
Perhaps this may include
skipping some favorite part
or even better yet,
try to leave your phone at home
I dare you to un-connect.
There is surely something we could do
to want not waste not for a day.
Just think how easily time gets used up
when we’re careless with our attention.
Sometimes the devotion we develop
doesn’t have a real chance to flourish,
because we can never see eye to eye.
There are those others
we get along with without any triggers,
those solid people who are our friends
they tend to stick with us
throughout the entirety of our lives.
Then there are the love drawn illusions
who seem to take from us
let’s try for one day
to want not waste not
just to see
how it makes us feel.
-
Today I fell in love
with the girl who shares with us
her daily outfit
leaning slightly backwards
on either her desk or table.
She’s the one who said,
she must tell us about her haircut,
because we never ask.
This moon-lit girl
is forever writing,
always coming home
straight from work.
She comes alive each night
feeding her starving readers
with enough material
to quench our appetite.
The blogging poet,
with her strict accent
I hope she doesn’t mind
I fell in love with her tonight.
-
With love cut-up and partitioned
there’s a bounty out there
for a girl who stole everything.
From all sides though,
she had no other real choice,
but to defend her superstitions.
With an outright will to win
she wasn’t one to sit around and wait
unless of course,
time was already too late.
The girl had done one deed though
she knew how to cut ties
no trace like she never entered the room.
Why just yesterday,
the girl had another in love
no need for first names.
Lately it’s been
a string of honest mistakes.
Fortunately for her though,
her beauty isn’t about to fade
still as attractive as she’s ever been.
Still, the bounty was outstanding,
the weight weighs too heavily
for her to simply move on.
-
She asked and happily answered,
both equally in the same breath,
almost as if,
she wanted a perfect kiss to lips.
Of course I obliged
by offering up my mouth,
close enough to simply do as she wished.
The girl spun around in return
and what started out slowly at first
quickly enveloped into something else.
Hands were full of ideas
and there we were,
for the first real time
out in the public eye.
With her eyes under mine
expecting more than this kiss
she pushed our cordial innocence
up over the edge.
From this moment forward,
understand that nothing comes easy.
She inched even closer still,
I could feel her breathing
beginning to intensify.
Her voice was mixed with secret intentions
she played with something
a little more private
squarely in front of others
I have to admit,
this balancing act was exciting.
Afterwards, I stood their staring
was this wisest choice after all?
It was too late to question or answer
both of us had already fallen
we could only lay there
wounded on the field
love and all of its pitfalls
had clearly won.
-
Hovering thinking waiting wanting.
The girl had all her belongings
laid out on a tiny table, waiting,
thinking I was late.
Too late, I was already in love
watching with all the answers
I could hardly wait
for her to ask and notice.
Aimlessly through the pages,
her book had her attention now,
jealous simply because
her eyes were so focused.
Beauty, her natural companion guide
the way her hair
formed a set of ringlets
not knowing I had beat her there
memorizing with admiration
the best is her natural way
she’s a carved out sculpture
all ready to be adored.
The girl in the garden
wanting to hide her thorn,
sitting all too pretty
without a care in the world.
-
The predawn stare
planning out the day ahead.
The treacherous stairs
down the side of an eroded cliff
every neighbor has them
row after row after row
a protective rib cage spanning the coast.
A century of family members trudging
along a worn out trip to the beach,
how time has taken from this place.
The gentle fog seems so peaceful,
as it roles in and out every day
grabbing with it’s long fingers.
This was a summer project perhaps,
a time when society freely gathered
to lend a helpful hand.
Today however, those hands want.
With just two weeks to restore
a safe well built pathway for friends.
What must of taken years to complete
will be dismantled and hauled by nightfall.
Uneven boards laid over sand
the sun bakes every bit of moisture out,
causing a twisted and contorted path
a broken spine spewing across the sand.
The once beautiful walkway allowed us
to walk hand in hand and make promises.
By myself, with the sun just coming up
I can only hope these new steps
will be used and walked on
for the next 100 years
through decades of change
long after I’ve left.
-
There is an open chance at love,
a one in a million opening
where it’s no surprise
just how glued our eyes get.
I find her irresistible
this must mean something
when it’s hard to think.
She wears a forever necklace that says,
i very simply wish…
Perhaps the necklaced gift
was her lucky charm from me,
held close to her nape.
When she comes near
she plays this particular song
I can’t help but put eyes inside her
and just as the hour changes
this want comes alive in us both
so much so, that it hurts
to be too far from her.
The quiet words felt it too,
along a set of prearranged orders,
she whispered the trigger phrase
that fires off an exclusive sensation
that helps in our recovery.
I love her unlike
anyone else,
she holds a reservoir ready to give
there in her open hands.
She sees herself
in my eyes,
and in my hands
I cover the small of her back
giving her the time and attention
she craves.
-
With a half torn look
she brings the microphone
softly to her lips
and for the first real time
we get to hear that voice.
In front of an audience
she sings her glorious ballads
I swear she was born for this night.
Eyes affixed in adoration
the volume grows around her
we try to sing along.
The bright stage lights
highlight the wonderful performer,
just yesterday we were writing songs
and now tonight, she’s singing
about her brilliant life
strung out here before us.
The dedication in our eyes
I can remember a time
when she was unrecognized,
the competition taken personally
from a place where
her confidences were waining
not believing just how amazing
she looks up on that stage.
-
I can see why
it takes a while to get close
to you it’s a slow delicate ride.
If I could get with you,
I’d have a good laugh
at all those who said
you would never love me back.
Like last night when you were
everlasting helping me
catching up to our last time.
It was a surprise
to see that smile return so quickly,
I was hopeful at first,
but now that we’re connected
you mean the world to me.
Both of us have tried
to say it in a way
that makes perfect sense.
I’m still going to love you
fast forward to the end
between this moment and then
you can come stand by me
broken side and all
we could fall all over your blankets
in your bed of pillows
make love and everything.
I can see you
trying to tell me
you’re ready to try something new.
I’m open to show you
this whole other side
you never saw coming.
-
With time and attention balanced
all eyes shift in one direction.
From that first time,
until this latest moment
the girl sits seductively polished.
Miles from an unfinished garden,
the thorn bush completely removed,
the coveted yard in heirloom blossoms
sits ready to prove her work.
Waiting to properly answer,
having memorized the trigger words
her beauty is ready to strike.
Accurate and Domineering
she puts her wishes out on display
a room that has been all planned out
the hooked ropes beg to bind
from feathers to the candle’s flame
she dreams of a hand to her backside.
Driving her want into a frenzy,
tonight she’ll be on display
the spell hours coming in waves
the heavy whispers inch to ears
everlasting ache is turned sideways,
and just as hands entwine
she pushes back on both elbows
driving every inch of desire
deep up inside.
-
Believing in something bigger
betting there’s no need to worry
while on knees leaning to elbows
please form a prayer chain.
This righteous plan works,
call it divine or something else
we will perform whatever it takes
to shine with supportive love.
No matter how it looks
there are second chances
to second choices.
Some will will it to be our truth.
Today, good luck calls your name,
you are our champion
you are my brother too.
When you see someone
completely vulnerable,
a strong younger brother
now seems mortal,
the world can shift and support.
Today we’ll start our prayer-chain.
For now though gently hold his cape,
be that insulating layer
when change is hard to imagine,
still, a thousand warm nights
are ahead of you both.
His children, those daughters
carefree and energetic
keep that as your energy guide.
Let these days pass in time-lapse,
erase all doubt
let love surround all thoughts
be that internal energy
where anything can be overcome.
Let them see your hopeful optimism,
even as you’re fighting
on your own path.
I made a promise to friend that I’d post a ton of poetry as she fights this inoperable Stage 4 lung cancer. The cancer has metastasized and gone to the neck and brain. She hinted that having poetry to read helps with time. A while back she was diagnosed with breast cancer (Remission Now) and to pass time with those sleepless nights she wrote these beautiful letters by hand. About once a week I’d receive a bundle of letters, it was amazing.
Having already survived breast cancer a few years back, this newest setback has had fewer and fewer options. We talk almost daily and our standing rules are we laugh, but never cry. Never Cry. It goes both ways, our no cry rule. Listen, we understand a good cry is actually helpful, but it’s now more about honoring our mantra and smiling at stuff rather than hold it inside.
There will be time for crying later, just not today. It actually makes it bearable to talk about scary stuff, very matter of factly, so in that respect, it’s helpful to have our standing no crying rule.
This girl and I are on different time zones(she’s 3 hours behind) as she lives on Hawaii and I’m in California we have our ‘routines’ down so to speak. Last night she calls at an off hour outside her norm and leaves a message crying. Naturally, the radar goes up and I need to call her. This particular time, we cried.
Her younger brother collapsed yesterday and had a seizure. MRI showed a mass on his brain and will be flown to a bigger hospital today for a diagnosis and treatment plan. She’s devastated. Her younger brother was the one helping her to keep motivated and pushing forward. He is married with 4 young children and a guy who puts others first always.
I’m a firm believer in prayer chains. All that read this, can you throw out prayers for this family. For those of you that have never prayed before, just say something kind in your mind for them. Love you.
-
We drink from paper cups here,
that fragile first introduction
and she’s in my head again
the girl who holds everything close.
These are the delightful first starts
that never seem to hit their mark.
From the first night until now
there’s no waiting on this one,
she and her sensitive side,
it means I can write.
There’s something about
being the one she includes.
There’s a rush to hear her voice
getting back into conversation,
she twists her hair and pretends
magic comes from natural places
not from made up fairytales.
Reasoning love is mess with her
there’s no room for middle ground.
She steps forward and accepts
that first time kiss, almost as if
she’s about to get into trouble.
It’s unusually pretty here
looking at the pouring rain
from underneath her middle,
she’s tangled and caught by this storm.
Fruit stains our open palms,
hands have that sugary feel
so I climb back to her ear,
she whispers a seven-digit combination
waits for my reaction to take hold.
Always in a state with her
I can’t keep her from coming around
no matter how much it takes
her charming path to my edge
she always has an open palm
she likes for the law to be laid down.
These last four hours
have mattered most
simply because
we’re drinking from paper cups.
-
The trouble curves
are happen stance
triggered by some chance encounter.
With just one look,
all good judgement
is stripped and torn away.
Today we must redefined as the beginning
so that yesterday will have its purpose.
Everything between the delicate strangers
was going exactly as planned,
a chance encampment with a stranger
was the perfect recipe for walls to fall.
No matter how many hours are expected
it takes just one, to make it across.
Forever and a day perhaps
it should not make a difference
if we’re at the start or in the middle.
All we know is the here and now
where the fresh and new alike
both begin and start.
These kinds of beginnings
aren’t arranged or set to a plan
it makes no difference,
when we are called or drawn.
Everything prior hasn’t quite worked.
Hands reach to tell the story
spreading her uneven surfaces,
she and her early summer dress.
A new season is now upon us,
just as neither has truly asked
it’s hard to imagine why
this one was by herself.
A balanced playful mind,
witty and somewhat complicated
silence does not shake her confidences.
Eyes lock for the first time
and now this, is what is expected.
This newness calmly celebrates,
the march of a thousand beats plays
somewhere off in the distance.
I’m the first to admit
her spell seemed so far fetched,
yet here I am
twisted in her line.
Her new and handsome delivery,
we’re locked in a spacious room
we won’t quit until all the steps
are memorized and learned.
-
Nostalgia’s quick and easy grasp
the memory trigger pushes us
up and over the edge we go.
There’s no use in feeling
the height of this fall
will be enough
to kill us both.
We have these last few seconds
here on this earth
before we reset and start again.
Her hands have always been the steadiest,
she reaches and takes control.
The force of wind is blinding
it’s hard on the eyes to pay attention,
and just like she always does,
this free fall stops and hovers.
The outside world go washing by
still, we’re in this protected bubble
she’s quietly inside
repeating the words
from a 2000 year old Sufi poet.
“i want you to laugh
to kill all your worries
to love you
to nourish you.”
With those words
and her soft kiss
the free fall is over
with no light or warning
we abruptly stop
the last sound
the thud of our bodies.
With the dust cleared and settled
in what should be two bodies
there was simply nothing.
-
From this start until our last,
it’s hard to get out of our own way.
Yesterday had all its promises, yet
today we have no imagination
still stuck in our stubborn ways.
If words are all that we’ll ever have
let’s make each writing a trigger
back to the days when we were lovers.
That excited joy
having that unquenchable fever
we could have squeezed life in our hands.
Oh but not all is lost,
there are inoculations for such imaginings,
a flu shot perhaps,
to erase this one sickness
away with this aching feeling.
Let there be no more whispers
deep in the nautilus shell.
There are others who have lined up
simply grateful for the chance
to spend an hour in the infirmary
kneeling at the side of the bed.
Gladly accepting sickness from the fever.
Eventually, just like all other things
this quiet solitude will have its price.
One day someone will wake up
and find that these words
are but an empty glass.
-
With everything all figured out,
it’s been a week now
since speaking strictly in confidence.
Love torn is love divided and
it is all too easy to go all quiet.
When yesterday spoke
and refused the hand
a coveted position was lost
or was it stolen?
The seasons do not ask
if it is their turn to dance,
change is always gradual
never so sudden as to
take one by surprise.
It was a mistake to think
that both sides are equal,
that of a lover and friend.
Quite on the contrary
I am here to defend
love outweighs and conquers
the anemic casual friend.
It is such a waste to say
that the day was never claimed,
left here to rot in absolute ruin.
Words are born to their truisms,
some neglect to consider all outcomes
certain ideas are not spoken by decree.
One must accept the extended love
in whatever way it arrives,
it’s all too easy to be pushed aside.
Once refused and shut out the gate
with a look of,
your kind are there with them.
Kindness is but a blind fool,
ignorance is the price to be paid
never to say we’re just this or that,
instead, promise to love
until our deaths.
-
Accepting the invitation,
as much as he would not
meant giving his chance away.
At second or third thought
it would have been crazy of him
to turn down such a request.
It would have taken in fact
the strength of ten
very muscled bound men
to stop this strange encounter
from ever happening,
but then again they might not have
slept through the deafening ringing
set from her suspicious phone.
It has always been a challenge
keeping her secrets from falling
into the wrong hands.
One time she proclaimed
with the deadliest of faces
those extra texts just simply
weren’t coming from him
instead with the lamest of excuses
apparently her phone was hacked.
With all these 21st century terms
it’s hard to imagine now
who’s telling the truth
and who could be the liar.
With time and attention I suppose,
always having special meaning
on our side had no real choice.
It was time to start all over again,
so when that invitation
came knocking at the door
it was hard to ignore
the importance it bore.
Try as one may
to dismiss it away
the letter demanded opening
and try as he might
he could not ignore
the pleas coming from
such perfect penmanship writing.
It boils down to some old cliche
you get what you pay for
and since he had deposited
all this time in her
it was inevitable
he now owed her
some attention.
-
When devotion is born from two sides
it’s easy to see how and why
a temporary bond can join.
Temporary simply because
time can’t stand still or alone.
Where one wants and shares
the other may give and please,
this balance is easily transferable.
Love has its own currency
some choose to hoard and save,
while others may flood the market
giving and going into debt.
The change we share with each other
comes from sorrows sweet hand of despair.
She swears her love to be true and fair.
Countless are the hours
I’ve waited in this exact place
watching as she plays the mother,
I still want a daughter.
Watching as she convinces another
she’s happily in love.
I’ve watched the length of 21 seasons
come and change the dead.
There are a set of certain demands
she’ll never give into,
or shall I say, her demands must be met
before she will dutifully fall on her sword.
She wants both sides
to be free and equal
no matter the cost to the armies.
Battles will be fought and won
walls torn down and explored,
new adventures and promises,
and all of this is only possible
when love feels.
-
With rarely used eyes
imperfectly perfect as they are
you’re the crowd favorite
it’s hard not to notice why
the beautiful distracted girl
always remains the same.
Standing here in front of stone
even I try not to notice,
this difficult path ahead
I casually turn and look away
today there is something special.
Beauty comes from different measures
devotion outweigh her looks,
still, she’s busy playing in my mind.
I concede I might be blind
to think I could accept her challenge.
I depend on her words
to help with my direction.
I’ve come to memorize every inch
from silence to the tone in her laugh.
Above everything else
it’s her mental strength
all of this is hard to explain
coming from this extraordinary woman.
I truly listen to her thoughts,
when there’s not much to say.
She has the firm hand of a leader,
I swear she’s an exact dance
she loves above all else
touching and playing with emotions
She will give individually if she must,
however, she prefers everyone all at once.
She’ll console you in her corner
can you see she’s in all of us
this perfect amazing woman.
-
In the solitude of these hours
the house slowly wakes.
Plastic garbage bags strewn about
a first year of college is finally over.
Today is like the first day of summer,
even if it were a month too soon.
The sky looks so differently here,
the previous years of drought are gone.
The memory floods at this window
unseasonable rain pours.
A lit cigarette interrupts the clean air
and it’s all the same.
The unpaid balances of yesterday
still remain the same today.
Many of these instructional hours
where one is truly learning
is spent in solitude’s tepid grasp.
Todays pouring rain
promises the day to start even later.
The house is quiet
it’s just past noon and
breakfast was either skipped
or not started,
welcome home.
-
Bad posture and miracles
it’s satisfying to finally get my turn
oh to be the narcissist
starting everything with I, Me or My.
It’s about time I fell in line
and ended things with my lover
I’m tired of thinking that
just about anything can be fixed
if given the right time and attention.
I’m about to rip my lover from my side,
inside, it’s just not working at this time.
My tough side can be the bad guy,
time is terrific now because
my memory has stopped recording.
For centuries now,
I’ve fought with myself
to come full circle
in order to turn around to see,
I still love her even more.
Around and around,
it’s been my drug-fueled addictions
keeping me locked up here.
It’s time to seize the day
it’s super quiet and I’m thinking clearly.
Maybe it’s useless to try tonight,
I can’t imagine why
I’m going to shove my lover aside,
maybe I’ll say baby,
she’ll beg me and pull me right back in,
I’m being selfish yet again.
In all honesty, I’m here because
I can’t be alone and by myself.
Maybe, instead of baby
I will not be a coward
and simply put an end
to what’s been stopping me
all along.
-
It’s been a while since we last met
that intense desire to get you undressed
we try making small talk,
it never works.
Thumbs to waist getting pants off,
jumping in an excited bed
begging to feel alive again.
Cold knees on hips, the saddle,
squeezing with your weight.
The forgotten the playlist,
hands awkwardly support
over the edge you hang
hair softly tickles
the very tips of your breast on my chest
by instinct one hand cups
the words to songs are ready.
You sit on top and stare,
softly at first of course
there was a moment
I could feel the hours in your workouts.
Toned muscles are different from before
with no time to waste
back in your upward position
all four hands explore the surfaces.
Equally pressing downward
the warmth is spread perfectly even
the hardness over satin
parted the opening.
With a feverish return
heavy are the gasps of wanting
time is no longer the stranger
the wait we’ve had to endure,
as the room is quickly devoured.
Tunnel vision with the task at hand
releases that darker side in us
with words we used to whisper
we have come alive here again tonight.
The control is truly complimented
a hard kiss to the neck
the arch of the back
a bite has left its mark.
The feeding hour upon us
a quick frenzy of darting in and out,
she’s rolled over onto all fours
anchored to accept what’s coming
heaving while pushing forward
such an intense display
the full length disappears completely
the pleasure takes all control away.
Both bodies react in different measures,
distance between the sessions fades,
the familiar release is coming
words forcefully explain.
Exact directions keep getting louder,
closer to the ear we fall
whispering is really hard
with permission granted
toes close and then they curl
a wave of explosions
taking out all support columns.
The detonation a huge success
crowds cheer as the dust rises
a heap of rubble lay under
these are our connections
just as the playlist ends.
-
I wish she never swore,
because I swear
my mood had a real need
to take a piece of her.
Both the good and bad
sit equally on both my shoulders.
Bent over and spanked,
the naughty girl
and her look begs,
looms heavily over head.
Truly, she needs forever
to make it here, next to me.
I think yesterday
when I felt with the back of my hand
her skin was feverish,
it’s what started all this again.
The pressure in her throat builds,
she drops her eyes,
taking on the perfect loom
accidentally tearing at her sleeve.
Pinning both wrists
high over head
the consequence in living means
I get to take a piece of her
whenever she asks.
Everything is always temporary,
nothing ever sticks
even her pretty side
has this unmistakable side
that’s hard for her
to simply keep it simple.
Of course her star lit control
is often misguided,
she can never blame herself
it’s always someone else.
Quick to find out why
she turns to explain her embers,
but there is something
causing her eyes to tear.
All she ever truly wanted
was to have time and attention
to be exclusively hers.
-
When we speak our truths
there are certain words we use,
words that help define and explain
who or what we are inside.
It wasn’t my intention
to get all philosophical, but love,
was something on my mind today.
Love must be at the top of my list,
it helps define my awkward attentiveness.
Love is my friend that interrupts thoughts
it wants to play and distract.
Frustrating and mad, love,
it’s my silent partner I keep to myself.
To be loved, is truly the most difficult.
It’s hard to hear someone say it.
I’ll keep working on my truths,
try to develop a better way of thinking.
My poems are my promised oaths,
they keep yesterday alive and relevant.
There is richness and depth when we love,
it means you’re important to someone else.
I care for you and I love you just the same.
Life couldn’t be more crystal clear
it’s a journey of accepted thoughts.
If love were something of value
its cost would be immeasurable.
Certainly there are other values
I could have use instead,
but I keep coming back to love.
There are no doubts.
to the path that is inherently inside of us.
Love stays awake in us all day
aware of each hour in our sleeplessness.
Love can be uncertain and frightening
it can hurt without warning.
Love is cautious and guarded.
Happy Mother’s Day
Dragonfly Poetry 